So not quite a field report per se but something I thought I'd post. I'd noticed the other day that it had been exactly a year since I split up with my long term girlfriend (of around four years), it was a meagre relationship that we were still in mainly because of comfort, the thought occurred after pondering how quickly ones lifestyle and situation can change drastically in such a small time scale.

So anyway, I've been up here for about 6 months, and working in my current position to which at the moment I'm pretty integral (not trying to boast, it's just the company has me doing the job of about 4 people). And now I'm finding that I've made friends, contacts and have had new experiences, and that a new opportunity has made itself available. It's yet to be confirmed, but I would be involved with going on tour with bands and whatnot, learning new shit and getting paid generously, I'd be stupid not to take it up right?

But the usual fear of change is kicking in, what if this, what if that, I mean I know that I should be willing to take risks and what not, but still. And it would require me devoting a lot of my time towards it, in that I'd have fuck all of a social life for about 3 months, which would seriously hurt my ability to go out and practice socialising, something I've grown pretty fond of doing lately.

You'd be touring with bands which would seriously damage your social life?

It's 3 months, best case scenario you absolutely love it and have the time of your life
worst case scenario it sucks after one week but you have skype and phone to chat to your friends family and you are generously paid for 3 months

I've just upped sticks a week ago and moved to Montreal.
No job or anything and everybody speaks French as their first language (most people also speak English as their second)
If it's fear I can tell you that no matter what it will work out ok in the end!

If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always got

Good stuff, I'd feel really bad about leaving my current place since were mid-project and I wouldn't be leaving them in a good way, guess it's just business though.

Was out with XFC and Shahansha, Dave and Shaun in 5th after Improv, and to say the least I thoroughly enjoyed the night, mainly because I had stopped worrying about any pressure on approaching or 'sarging', and just set out to have a decent night.

I had a few brews, but I wasn't drunk, actually I was fairly lucid and very aware of my body language, which makes quite a change since historically I've gotten absolutely slaughtered, and pulled ... somehow, with no memory of how I did it (and I'm often quite curious as to how?). It was pretty enlightening to observe my own behaviour when reasonably drunk but still lucid enough as not to be talking like a stammering idiot!

Two thing's I learnt from last night, and one thing enforced...

1. Enjoy yourself
At the end of the day, your out to have fun, there's no need in going out with the pure intention of 'pulling', be willing to go home alone.

2. Social Proof
I hate using pua terms, but this one served a purpose last night, as I spent the first few hours just wandering around talking to people and introducing myself, developing a bit of a friendly environment. This then came into use later on when approaching groups, as one or two of the group already knew me and were quite happy to introduce me to the group making it a lot easier to get comfortable.

3. Kino
Escalation has always been difficult for me unless inebriated, as I was always unsure whether or not to attempt it. This is nothing new, and I'm sure you guys are all aware of it, I'm just starting to get a bit more practice with it. Just picking up on the little signs, innocent but contacting gestures, eye contact, touching hair, looking at lips then eyes etc, etc building up intimacy and contact with her. Of course on occasion she will be a bit more drunk than you so the little signs are pretty damn obvious, so its almost impossible to not pick up on it.

So that's it for last night! Might be out again tonight depending on how the night goes, I want to get the hang on drinking the right amount, feeling a buzz and getting comfortable, without overstepping to the point of slurring or acting like a dick (which I have done on occasion!).

Went out to the old home town stomping grounds last night, was kind of a good night, met up with some old mates and then out meeting folk! Went to a bar with shishe pipes, and had a conversation with a few folk at the bar, nice girls.

Anyhow's started talking to somebody at the other side of the club, she looked about late twenties to early thirties, turns out she was 42! I made a few jokes about women around her age know their way around the bed posts after she commented that maybe I should be trying to hit on somebody my own age, but I don't know there's something about 'cougars' that's inherently sexy. So anyway, we end up kissing, she was pretty coming on pretty strong to be fair, but then her friend dragged her away, I laughed and moved on.

So I went to the bar to get a drink, and without thinking I said hi! to the first person besides me, and before I even realised I turned around and it was my ex whom I've not spoken to in months! Awkwardness aside we started talking and catching up, one thing led to another and we head back to hers. Kinda feels like this was a bit of a cop out though, but there you have it, there was my Saturday!

So weird one yesterday, I'm down to Oxford for a conference and I'm surrounded by like minded geeky people (yes acne problems where quite prevalant). Great conference a lot of very intelligent speakers,but I found myself as shy as I used to be, literally couldn't speak to a soul. That is of course until the after party, after only one ale (those who know me know that I can drink a lot more that one ale) I knew everybody, shaking hands, forgetting names, playing games (not metaphorically, they actually had multiplayer retro games consoles, I was playing bomberman for hours), got offered yet another job, you get the picture. Suffice to say I didn't stop at one, I mean come on free booze, wouldn't you take your fill?

But I'm thinking now, that my social inadequacy isn't overcome by a little social lubrication, but maybe the frame set that merely the introduction of alcohol presents? One step closer I guess...

But anyhow, that was my Friday!
Stay classy San Diego.

You out tonight?

And to top it off I found myself drunk off my ass in the middle of Oxford with no idea where I was, a blocked card, no phone or tablet, and two guys following me, not pleasant at all. Managed to get a taxi and pay via offset card transaction, though I was hoping for a bumming, oh well... Hah!

Yeah man, think I'm meeting a mate at NQLive but I'll be out after that, give us a text fella

Out again last night with XFC and Shahansha, great night as always with those guys, I always love going out after improv since your already in the banter mood and you tend to have a right laugh while doing it.

We start getting into the swing of things, a few approaches, here and there but the focus seemed to be more on just having a bit of a fuck about and enjoying the night. So you don't really care if you get blown out or rejected, plus being with the guys is a reassuring return, even if things go tits up you know you've got a mate there giving you a pat on the back "good try mate", it sounds a bit too needy or requiring of approval but it tends to keep your spirits up.

Anyway! Shahansha cottoned on to a few lair guys floating about, I didn't pay them much attention until he mentioned them to be honest, but after he noted it I couldn't help but laugh at them, they looked like weird creepy people hanging around the bar waiting for the end of the night to pounce on some drunk girl. Being stone cold sober (which from other threads works fine for some people) and not showing even the slightest hint of a smile or even that your having fun, then I mean seriously, what is the point of you even being there?

So closing the near of the end of the night, XFC and Shahansha shoot off and I'm left with a girl on the side and here comes my dilemma, I seem to be completely inept in sealing the deal so to speak, numbers and saliva were exchanged but my nights invariably end with a girls friends stealing her away, me losing her, or on occasion me just losing interest and forgetting (that one can't be helped!).

Ah well, time to practice a bit of text game!