Fuck this fuck this shit.
Ive been blow out by text at work by both girls in the same day ffs.
I knew there was sumat up as both txt me at least once everyday neither had for 2 days.I deleted the first text in frustration but this is the second from the girl from swimming thread.

Hey hope ur ok.Ive been thinking about how to say this and figured saying it straight forward was the best way.Ive realisied that im not ready for a relationship,not even one brewing on the horizon.i really would like to be friends with you i think youre awsome.but i feel that it would be best for me to remain single for quite a long time,ive always gone from one relationship to the next,and i feel so messed up about it.i feel pretty messed up atm about everything.i cant tell my head from my arse.im sorry if you feel ive led you on,it wasnt intentional,i have just realised i need to work on my life and liking myself again before i can do anything else X

This translates to me as your a chode you got lucky you pulled me i let you lay me once now your slapped in my friends box,cos im banging the guy i keep name dropping at work now cos hes a natural and your a fucking loser.No way ul be my bf now!!
I tried to ring her but no answer so i left a chode message on her answering machine.
Im sick of this ive spent hundreds of hours watching dvds,reading going out to shit fucking pubs and clubs i hate to sarge.Doing all this crap for what 1 lay since may!! Ive never asked for more than im due over the past few years ive given away as much value as i can,dont i deserve to be happy!!.For what to finally finally get some results then boom blown out again.It hurts man ive got a knot inside and such rage.Everyone says dont be outcome orientated i defy anyone to tell me they didnt come on here for the outcome!!I wish i never got any at all then it wouldnt be like trying to hold onto water
Fuck it im gona drop pua for a bit its doing me and my furiture no good at all.I need a time out think im gona spend more time doing my aa stuff and try to do some self forgetting for a while.

Don't think this. Never ever reject yourself like that. One of my biggest problems with this community is that it gives people this illusion of total control, so they blame themselves for things they have NO control over. You have absolutely no idea what she thinks, don't insult yourself like that. You don't need it and you don't deserve it.

You talk about this like it's such a chore.You hate to sarge? I can't think of many things more fun. A night out should be a crazy fun adventure, regardless of results. Actually, it was the minute I stopped caring about about results that I started to really enjoy going out. I still have it a little bit and I think its the one big thing holding me back. Inject some fun into the whole thing. Don't worry about the top of the hill, just enjoy the ride.

second what stein said. STFU about everything in your third paragraph; it's nothing but destructive thoughts. Best thing you can do is take any emotion that you have relating to these girls and tuck it away in a little mental cardboard box. And then blast it out of a mental cannon and never let it bother you again.

It happened to me right away after I started getting with pickup, and then I quickly learned I didn't get 'good' right away, but simply understood how to pull the right things at the right time, but not how to calibrate. Your ego about pickup got too big too fast, which (likely) happens to a lot of us from what I can tell. Accept it, and move on. Don't kill yourself over it.

Remember, they're only mindless girls. Girls are emotional creatures. They don't know what they want, they simply run on impulse. What you need to understand is that you screwed up, and this is their way of showing you. It's not 'personal' against you, because... hell, they hardly know you, right? All that it means is you progressed incorrectly, and this is them telling you this. Think of it as them helping you out for every other girl that's going to come your way. They're instructing you how to act properly for the next girls.

Right now you're calibrating yourself to game, rather than a specific girl or event. Know you pushed too hard too fast, and adjust from here.

You've got the pickup technique down, but now it's time to become an artist.

Lovefish. As your friend, I am going to say this.
CMON DUDE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Things could be far worse.
Don't blame yourself.

You don't NEED these girls. There are like, what, 3 billion women on the planet?

You're putting yourself in a mindset of scarcity.. not abundance.. you sound needy in the posts, I wouldn't fuck you if I was a HB10 with your actions. Would you fuck yourself?

You're better than this Lovefish, Think of the progress from day 1.

There is no hurry, no deadline, slow down, enjoy life

Lovefish I have been playing with this in my head all day and I think you have grown too emotionally attached to what you hoped would be FB but deeper down you really wanted a relationship.

I remember you saying that you've just come out of a relationship so chances are it's hard to separate relationship behaviour with just a bit of fun and I'm sorry to hear you feel a bit upset.

I think like the others say, because you have placed so much ownus on having these 2 girls, by not getting them you have seen it as a failure. Hence why the main advice being is just to have fun.

PU is just being social but with girls. Become social with everbody then add intent with women, but most of all have fun with your interactions. Like you said the other week when you just spent time with that girl, enjoy it mate then the rest will come.

By setting a solid goal of sleeping with a certain number of people or especially 1 person in particular you can often fail or lose sight of what you really want.

What do you really want? is it just to get laid lots or do you want another relationship? I would suggest having a bit of meditation time and thinking about what you want and how you want to get it...

Hope you're ok though

Ok the dummies back in and the tables been glued back together now!!
Couldnt stay away long could I !!.Ive been reading this awsome link from Alpha D
Strength Of Reality. : Alexander~
These statements both seem to fit where i am now.

If you are a beta male or a female your reality can take any shape or form as long as it is something that is re-enforceable. The more it can be externally reinforced, the stronger your reality will be, the more you will feel like you fit in somewhere, the more secure you will feel, and from a secure reinforced feeling comes a good feeling. Although it seems like madness to think that some people will feel good from being a chode, let me explain how chodes are born. Imagine a beta male thinks that he can be a pick-up artist. He goes out and creates actions that come from a place of diminished self-esteem. He’s trying to create a strong reality of ‘pick-up artist’. But because he’s ultimately taking value by being a beta male, he won’t be attractive and girls won’t like him. So, he will have the fact that he’s a chode reinforced so many times that soon he will just think that he’s a chode. Soon, he will become frustrated with all the bad feelings associated with trying to become a pick-up artist and quit trying because his primary drive as a human to live in a strong reality won’t materialize. Instead, he will accept he is a chode and look to reinforce that by taking no more actions. When he takes no more actions, the chode reality will become reinforced, a form of reality that will at least yield some good feelings that come due to an externally reinforced reality that leads to a secure feeling.



To be the guy with the most contextual confidence is a difficult thing to do. To be the best football player, the biggest pimp, the most hardcore drug lord or the rock star is near to impossible. These guys think and act in ways that inspire attraction because everyone gave them that permission. But in the realities of the 99% of guys trying to get into their positions, they don’t have the permission from others or the contextual confidence to think and behave in ways that inspire attraction in women – so they don’t get girlfriends. Even in the case of the rock star, drug dealer, sports star or business mogul, their title and contextual confidence is a fleeting and inconsistent thing, and like beta male and female realities their’s is a reality that is essentially a bucket with a hole in it that can never be filled. This type of contextual confidence game cannot be sustained. Sooner or later, the crutch will be kicked out from under the externally-formed reality and the reality comes crashing down like a house of cards.

This is called an identity crisis. When your reality comes crashing down you can lose your girl among many other things. This is why a lot of budding pick-up artists can pick up girls inconsistently, but struggle to keep the girls when they do. Again, this is why so many people turn to drugs – to escape the seemingly insurmountable task of being internally-fulfilled and attractive to women.

Thanks for all the comments guys
tbh i couldnt give a crap about the one from the start of this thread but the girl from "swimming the waters"
Yeh Dale now you say it i need to think about my end goals?? I thought i was coming on here to learn to bang loadsa hot goth birds,but after pulling that last hot goth bird i dno.I mean ive never banged about but ive always gone for ltr`s so was it habit,fear,scarcity mindset?? though i must say i felt she would be a perfect ltr for me.Porn star looks,got on so well tons of stuff in common.Feeling a bit confused about it now??wheres my pen and paper??
i know now i also need to work on my sense of reality as well as getting better patter.I wont deny im still a bit gutted and was thinking of staying friends with this chick but im not gona hang around with my dick in my hand,so im kicking both to the curb and moving on.I spoke to my m8 about this,guess i was looking for someone to tell me there there or sumat,i showed him a picture of the girl i laid and he was like fuck man your awsome!! i was like she left me tho she was gona be my gf.He wouldnt have it tho i was awsome!! So maybe already ive moved above his reality oh i dno its been a rough week all round in the world of Lovefish.I just feel im struggling doing this shit on my own right now,wish i didnt live so far away from peeps

how forward are you with your m8 about doing PUA? I've found it's really good to have someone who isn't a wing that knows that I'm doing PUA... they kinda help anchor me every once in a while if I need it... but it can also come back to bite you in the ass if you're not careful.

Slow and steady... it's not a race. This is your life. Think of 'pickup' as just another skill set you can learn, and that this is all for a long-term concept of improving who you are, rather than just getting girls.

Birds don't bring happiness... (more often than not they bring problems). Birds are someone to share your happiness that you've already internalized. Happiness comes from a fulfilled id and ego. If you need ego boost after this, try sarging without any goals of number or f-closing. Leave them wanting you, and go home alone thinking that she's wishing she would get more of you. You'll feel a lot better about yourself and how far you've come.

Why not? Hot girls do it all the time...

I already told this guy and a few others about pua before,all the same answer "Im ok i dont need it" theyve obviously not hit the rock bottom i have to feel i need to get this shit sorted.Im looking more for guys who can teach me stuff that have experience,tho obviously all wings are welcome
Ok man good sugestions there. Ill just head out on saturday and chill with it,no motives just have fun.
Tbh ive got someone lined up for lunch on saturday so ill see how that goes.If it keeps my mind off that other chick its all good.I dont even wanna think about her anymore i just wanna move on,but my brain keeps rolling her around like weve been married 20yrs rather than seeing each other three weeks.Very wierd stuff
tbh im just going to throw myself all the harder into my mma annd weight training,as this shit really makes me feel good

For the record, the link Lovefish provided that I PM'd him, was from a post on this forum so credit is due to original poster (dno who though!)

Lovefish - See.. you've already got a date lined up. Stop being so hard on yourself.. I think you're realising there is more to life than sex.... there are blowjobs too !!!

Just thought id give a big thumbs up to all the guys who suggested just going out and having fun.I went to a one off reunion from a long dead alternative night we used to have where i live.So there was people i hadnt seen from upto 10yrs.I just decided to go to have fun wid my m8s and not even worry about pua at all tonight.I really enjoyed it chatted to a lot of people and chilled not worrying about all that pua stuff.Loads of people said id changed for the better (bearing in mind i used to always be constantly inebriated) and i got a bit of interest from girls even tho i wasnt really fussed about picking them up.So all in all a good night and maybe a view point change in the way i should be acting/thinking when im out