My question? well its not that specific really... I need advice on 'what to do next'

So here I am at 04:32 in the fucking morning can't sleep with too much on my mind. Why? I'm not where I want to be with woman. I will tell you guys a bit about myself. I'm a 19 year old uni student, I'm a happy energetic friendly guy, I've got plenty of friends through multiple social circles, I'm a good looking chap with a good physique and I get plenty of attention from girls. However I have a constant tendancy to overthink and get stuck in my head.

Often I am stereotyped or assumed to be good with women, but if truth be told this is not really true. I wont go too much into my past but lets just say I was less fortunate looking to the point if I show you a picture of me at 15-16 you wouldnt recognise me (acne, overweight, short.. I grew a scary amount in a short time, etc.) I've never struggled to make male friends, however wasnt so good with the females as a nipper and didnt loose my virginity till I was nearlly 18.

As explained above things have changed quite dramatically for me and I have since experienced what would be considered by most 'good success' with women throughout uni so far... around 14 SNL's, around 100 kiss closes (yeah ummm i'm not so great at sealing the deal!) and an uncountable amount of random numbers/sets opened.) However I do not feel content with my success with women since it has all been fuelled by alcohol, after reading some advanced material (real social dynamics - blueprint) I realise I have been using alcohol as a shell.

I think the reason alcohol aids me so much is I am a big thinker, I'm certain I could think myself into a coma! So when around a new girl/girls I sometimes just freeze up and can't think of anything to say and just fuck it up. But the alcohol slips me out of my head so I can connect with people better and be in the moment having much more fun with a really postive energy. On a good night (when drunk) I can be the life of the party, crazy confident and close the best looking girl in the club... yet when I go out sober sometimes I can barely string up the balls to open a set of HB 5's!!!

I suppose the obvious statement is since I have always approached girls drunk I only have the ability drunk but I feel there is more to it than that. I see how my story may seem bizzare and somewhat farfetched since I dont see my situation to be a common type of issue among the PU community but believe me this is no exaggeration. I went out earlier tonight to a few bars with a friend and bumped into a girl who I saw previously last week drunk, instantly I could see she was puzzled as its as if she was speaking to a comlpetely different person tonight than she was last week. So what I'm asking is what to do? what steps can I take to get out of my head, stop worrying when approaching, and just relax!

Any help would be much Appreciated,
Regards Chris.

Your issue is simply one thing - inexperience.

The only reason to ever be "up in your head" and over-thinking situations is because either

a) you don't know how to control them or
b) you're worried about how they'll pan out.

Firstly, you need to realise that life is a ride. You just get on, hold tight and go with it. There's not really a lot of point worrying about it, because it's going to go where it wants to go, so you might as well just enjoy it.
What I mean by this, is that you're over-thinking situations because you're probably worried about how they're going to pan out, rather than adopting a "what happens, happens" attitude.

It's only when you really let go of the worrying that you can climb out of your own brain.

And by the sounds of things, you don't need to worry too much with the ladies. I guarantee that there are some good PUA's on here that haven't achieved 14 SNL's. You obviously have something that comes across naturally when you're the "life of the party"... try to find what that is and run with it.

Thanks for your reply mate, I do go out alot but as said normally under the influence of alcohol, perhaps why I'm seeing no real improvements in my game. I'll up the amount I go out each week and drink nothing and see how that goes. I also know what you mean about 'worrying how it pans out' I've read quite abit about 'outcome dependence', but I will work on it. As you said I need experience! Again thanks for your comment.

Hey guys

Although I haven't achived what Mastere has above, during uni I was pretty good with getting with girls, but not so much the big close.But that was like Mastere after a few drinks. I found that when talking to girls now I often talk quickly and do a lot of overthinking and therefore doesn't allow the mind to roam freely and project the you, that you want to project. Infact for me it lead to approach anxiety and a block of how to evne open. I think aswell though, Im quite worried about outcome dependence. I've been reading some Speed Seduction recently, but God does that seem hard to be able to chat someone up as its obvious but in many ways very out of the box and complex.

And is Ross right, that day game is actually better than night?

Sometimes you end up cock-blocking yourself. Man, I was like that when I was in uni, but you know what I did? I went out all the time. Like way too often; and a lot of the time I went out alone. That meant I was forced to start talking to new people, and slowly that got me over my AA. I knew bugger all about PUA back then, but I'd figured out that in order to stop being worried about talking to people, if I did it all the time I'd get over it, and that's what happened.

And as for day game vs night game, well i'm only just exploring day game now, and I'll be honest; I think that if you crack it, it's a goldmine - here's why:

Shock and awe.

That's it. It's that simple. You see, when a girl goes out at night, she's done up to the nine's, clothes and make-up all perfect, usually drinking and probably expecting to be hit on. They expect it a LOT less when they're just walking down the street in their tracksuit bottoms and t-shirt on the way to buy some milk.

I've actually just got back from an afternoon of day game, trying a few things to report. Look out for the field report in the next hour or so

This is your problem and I know I’m gonna sound like a hollier than thou arse, but if you’re using alcohol to prop up you game you fucked from the start.

False confidence mate you’re never going to get more confident if you rely on dutch courage. Kick those crutches away and if needs be take two steps back. That’s like saying smoking helps me deal with stress, but what about when you put the fucker out, stress comes right back at ya cos you want another.

Buy a self book on confidence, there are some good ones out there, just start talking to everyone, old ladys, the tesco’s girl, in time a HB10 will be no different to the geeky girl at the post office.

You can’t go day gaming with several pints in you, no girls gonna want to talk and if you start drinking during the day just to game well....

there is a great post BCB

http://www.puaforum.co.uk/field-repo...t-opening.html

I feel where you are coming from man. If it's anything like the uni i went to, it's safe to say that nightlife at the students union is far more high energy and alcohol fueled than the 'outside world'. And going out sober in that environment is down right fuckin hard! If you can master this, and I'm sure you can, then hats off to you

Glad to see you have your entourage sorted, I think you'll agree that is key in a uni social environment, especially in a single campus where everyone are mutual friends.Sounds like you are doing well at uni game in general, keep it up.

Check out an ebook called 'conquer your campus', I think you'll find it a good read.

Thanks for your advice guys, I definitley need to drop the alcohol, as a guy who takes his fitness very seriously and has a family history of alcoholics its for the best anyway. But as superstar mentioned the uni nights are somewhat different to 'the real world' they are incredibly high energy (and my god fun when you are drunk lol) and anything goes, which got me thinking perhaps I should start off in slightly more chilled out environments? thoughts on this? maybe avoid the student nights for a bit. You can stail out just by standing still for 5 seconds on a student night while everyone else is jumping around like lunatics.

Yeah thanks for your post knave, I'll look into self confidence books my inner game could be alot more tight, but as BCB mentioned I definitley have a 'lack of experience' especially now as I refuse to use pick-up lines anymore. A big thing I suppose I havent mentioned is my diversion from pick-up material to natural. Even sober I could pick up a HB 8 using pick-up material (and have done in the past even during day game) simply because I had a 'system' that has a good success rate with chicks.

A while a go I built a 'montage' of pick up material some my own some copied including openers, fun games, kino routines, DHV stories etc and sequenced it into a massive routine from open to close, my inner game was tempolarily solid and I was always scanning the club for the next set to bust after a month or so I could do the system without even thinking and felt like I was already a PUA master (LOL). However as I've since seen so many times before on this forum after about 2 months I couldnt get in state anymore and for a couple of weeks even got depressed which is incredibly out of character for me. I felt like this 'social robot' people often talk about and realised I had to drop the material which is what originally brought me to this site.

What I realised was the pick-up lines, the alcohol its all as knave mentioned 'crutches' and certainly isnt a cure for the problem. What is annoying is all the pua experience I have is kind of wasted because in a way im still at sqaure one. Having said that I dont feel I've had it as bad as some guys, generally I dont come across as a socially awkward person, nor am I quiet (by any means) am still pretty good at chatting around girls I know through mutual friends, or have met before. Its meeting and approaching new girls and its my own head that holds me back and the problem only persists with females! I've fucked up sets before where girls have opened me! telling me how attracted they are to me, its reasons like this why despite success with quite alot of girls, I am less than content. The big BUT is I WILL get this mastered lol... one way or another. Sorry for the ramble had to get this out I suppose I've kept my journey so far entirely to myself!

Very honest stuff here.

You've understand and that's what seperates you from the AFC, as you've said your journey is just beginning, kinda feels like two steps back one step forward doesn't it. Its crap, I know.

Don't worry about fucking up sets up I do it all the time and will continue to do it and I wonder sometimes why the fuck I hit a club stone cold sober when everyone is getting pissed, then I take a HB10 from her drunk boyfriend and take her to my mates party, while i'm getting pissed my mates spend all night drooling.

Thats why we do it

Respect man, with your determination you'll be amazingly.