joe the junior member makes a definitive entrance

WELCOME

lol!! dave has clearly learnt from the master

cheers philipe!!

Camarda

What advice would you give to some guy that came on here for the first time, Someone thats been quiet and shy all of there adult life.

He just wants a better life.

Shyness behavioral characteristic,habit that can be overcome, sounds about right.

yeah some people are introvert don't need as much social interaction as others.

I no what your saying, but is natural quietness really what you think it is, some people just lack social skills, and there fore keep quiet, with better social skills, i bet most people you would consider to be naturally quiet would become far more outgoing. How can you differentiate between the two, everybody introvert/extrovert, still enjoys social interaction, i would consider myself to be introvert, don't need company as much as most. Quietness like shyness can just be habit, brought on by a wide variety of reasons,that can be overcome.

I think almost everybody on here would agree.

Is your judgment with regards to forcing behavior characteristics correct, are you accusing people of doing this, when in fact there not, maybe your right but maybe your interpretation of certain information is wrong.

Tell me what people do not get this, new comers to the community?,In which case they will probably learn this all by themselfs, with time and understanding.

No, I think your bang on the money there mate!

I dont think I have ever met anyone who comes from being quiet (naturally) to being a sociable person and regretting it. He wont be saying this isnt me (sociable) and let me revert to being quiet because that is the "real" me.

I sometimes wonder if changing one's behaviour is a matter of decision. E.g. If you are lazy by nature, I wonder if you can just decide that enough is enough and I want to stop being lazy and indiscipline.

After all the shit that I have learnt since getting into pu, what have I actually learn? Just chill the fuck out, and stop going inside your head all the time so you can be in the present moment, and value your own existence as much as everyone elses. Doesn't take a year of approaching countless amounts of people to learn that, it doesn't take some meaningless sex with some pissed up bird to learn that shit, it just takes you to have the ability to accept who you are, no matter what the situation, and accept that you have just as much right to be enjoying your life as the next man, or woman. It just takes some mind relaxation practice, and perhaps some knowledge of how to be a more chilled out person in general. "Oh, but I hate who I am, and if I just accept who i am i'm gonna get what I always have got!" NO! WRONG! You only hate who you are because you haven't accepted who you are, and your character traits. You're always looking at other people and wanting to be more like them. You want a new identity for yourself, and you think by looking elsewhere you're gonna find it. This is pretty fucked up way of thinking in my opinion, and believe me I've been there! If this is your mind set, you are wasting your time going out trying to find this new identity through chatting up women. If you don't like yourself, if you don't LOVE yourself, then this is all a waste of time. If you can't see your flaws as just silly quirks, then you are taking life too seriously!

Learn to be your best self.

This comment isint about changing who your are, its about learning more about yourself,discovering more about yourself, being able to show your best qualities,discovering new qualities about yourself, learning how to better control negative,and destructive elements of your personality.

Learn to be your best self first, opportunities will come later.






How can people just accept themselfs when most don't even know themselfs,

Thats good, but that alone wont improve social skills.

I think you have to believe there are improvements that can be made in your life, be it socially or the kind of girls you aspire to. Just accepting things as genetic is not good enough if you want to improve your whole self.