Anybody know any funny openers or ridiculous ways to start conversations?

Anythin random.

Do you think its unethical to carry a goldfish in ur pocket.

Hi whats your name ??? ... and do you have any form of ID to prove that is in fact your real name

Excuse me, can u just hold this shoe for a min.

Excuse me, did you used to play barry from eastenders?

Im pretty sure i had a Wank over you in a porno last night.

Any chance you want to give me a fake telephone number??

You have such beautiful elbows.

just whatever random shit u can think of... they just came to me then... it just needs to be something to make them go huh?

Hahaha! fucking love that one!

Haha yes Ill try Jaz's poo one and the "I had a wank over you last night" one too. Those will be field reported!

Im glad no one started telling me the opener isn't important haha!

Trying to get into more self-amusement whilst talking to girls rather than 'trying to get her' if that even makes any sense.

I wanted to try these:

Fall over next to a girl, call her for help and say "I've fallen in love with you".

Go up and cold read her entire life, name, personality, however ridiculous for agggess, like 3 minutes. Just spouting nonsense to her, pause and be like "So how's it going?".

"I got bad news from the doctors, if I don't have sex in the next ten minutes Im going to die"

"i bet you a blowjob you wont have sex with me"

Gangnam style over to her

Facebook like and dislike stamping girls.

Walk over and talk about the plot of a Hollywood film, as if it just happened to you.

Love this.

Best way to do it is create it so it is ambiguous first, as if its a real life story. I.e.

The madest thing just happened.... i was adopted in and raised by a couple in kansas in america...

so i just been outside and these 2 guys and a girl start trying to fight with me....

so anyway, i check and dont have my mobile, i looked over the road and i see a phone box thought, i need to get to that.

So i run over to the phone box, put on a blue suit and my red cape... and i just flew around fighting these 3 people.... was really mad...

Im Superman by the way, whats your name.

U can do this with ANYTHIN!!!! gonna do this on holiday for a laff.

I open with funny shit all the time..

Sorry I'm late, I promise I won't keep you waiting so long next time

And the same the other way round.....you're late, I've been waiting ages for you

Girl has shopping bags.....so did you buy me anything nice? Fluffy handcuffs?

Go right up to a girl & have about 10 cheesy obvious pickup lines memorized & start spitting them one after another

Girl is lying down in the park, jump on the ground beside her.....holy shit I just fell out of that tree & landed here beside you, what's your name? (seen vitaly do this on a video today, can't wait to try it)

Haha yes, love them.

I think this should be retitled how to make your interactions fun and never run out of anything to do. I think that's an SP of mine; thinking there's a set thing to do or not to do, linear execution of talking to girls, when really its about messing around, having a laugh until you're alone.

I'll field report as many of these as I can this Friday, would be great if anyone else could too!

Some of these openers are amazing, can't wait to read field reports about them, or actually sod that I want to try a few myself, bout time I grew a pair!

The whole thing with trying/delivering these opener lines is that self amusement is paramount, rather than hoping for a particular reaction from the girl.