I hope this is posted in time.

Mindset is easy if you think about it like this, (like I do in fact). A real player thinks of pussy with impermanence, what this means is you probably have frustrations about can I keep this chick or will I ever find the right woman.

For a guy who knows he can meet hot chicks whenever he wants he does not have the continual paranoia about how hard its going to be to replace a girl. There is a lot of decent pussy out there, you are moving towards a place where she could be replaced the same day, if needs be. Don’t get hung up this being the best chick I’ve had.

The other advice I can give you is if you want to fuck her tonight you have to touch her as soon as you meet not creepy touch but firmly with confidence, if you wait too long then try after you've built comfort its going to seem really weird for her.

Use the 'knave greeting hug' as soon as you see her place both hands on her hips, move your hands up her back and pull her in for a hug, let her feel being pulled in, reverse this and release from her hips. Its a very powerful hug because it trips several off her switches.

Then keep up the kino all day when you take her back to yours and she asks where we are going it will only be token resistance.

Looking back it was like an internal war against myself me telling me its no big deal and my subconsious saying it was,is there anyway to rid myself of this way of thinking that i dont want??maybe mindset is easy,i just dont know how to change mine around yet??
She flaked anyways gutted third one on the trot plus i travelled 40 miles 20 each way to meet her (told her i was in the area anyways) lost a whole nights sleep and fried my brain watching pua videos.So Then I rang another girl up,the original one i wanted when i first came on this forum,she was happy to tell me all about her amazing sex with her new fella,another kick to the balls.I didnt really want to but went out with Giant (my first night out to a club/pub situation in over 3 years.It sucked tbh i couldnt approached and i felt really really awkward ,i ended up hanging out and talking with hairy chodes all night.So this weekend has been awful im feeling pretty low.I just dont understand how ur supposed to get good at this when you start with low self esteem/confidence and ur supposed to go out and get it knocked constantly?? Its like throwing yourself at a brick wall constantly hoping it will break.

to be honest, the issue is girls flake, i get girls flake.... all it takes is a mate to go, LETS GO OUT.

i suggest fuckin some ugly women, once u have a few under your belt, move onto 6's

once u find u have a few 6's move onto 7 & 8s by this time you have an understanding of how to act with women... by the time u move to 9 & 10 ur comfortable round women.... and if you can give a little of that disregard u have for ugly women... to hot women...

ur there. u cant eat steak with baby teeth

Ill try Phil but itl be a struggle:S
Ive tried to fuck ugos before i just cant bring myself to do it man.
Thats why ive slept with so few women,my skills are so low but my standards are so high.Im only interested in specific types of women,looks even the wrong eye colour can put me off.I know its totally stupid but its almost like its pre programmed in my head.

my standards are VERY high, but they wernt

ive never shagged MUNTERS

but i used to perceive ugly girls as fit... as time progressed it changed.

U NEED TO BE SCHOOLED!!! women are easy when u know how

Like I said to you last night, you took a big step forward, you put yourself into a social situation and looked comfortable most of the time. Don't beat yourself up.
We both choded up tbh, shit happens, today is another day.

Youve got to put yourself in the mindset of someone who goes with girls this hot all the time. If she gets the vibe that shes much hotter than girls you normally date then that will be a turn off for her.

So with that in mind ... dont treat her with kid gloves: dont ask her if shes OK all the time (thats probably the most obvious chody behavious to a hot girl), dont ask her permission to say/do something/go somewhere, dont back track if you say something she disagrees with or that she finds insulting, dont follow her every move (in shops etc), dont hang on her every word as if everything she says is fascinating.

Find something to bust her on, music is always a good one because chicks generally like arse music like R&B. Go into a CD shop and give her am "OMFG! you dont really like that shit do you" as she picks up a rhianna CD.

I understand where you are coming from phil but this isn't helping him.

Possibly the worst advice I ever got was just be yourself, be confident and be funny. No shit, I would have never worked that out myself. None of this helped obviously.

Look most of us have been where you are at some stage (maybe not self esteem issues, I've always been confident) but well chordy with women.

So first thing you take away from this is most of us start at exactly the same spot you are current in, if we can agree this we are making progress.

Its very possible has to be the first realisation. Walking up to HB10 in the street or club and seeing her shaved pussy the same night is a very real possibility and eventually you will look back and think wtf.

Second thing you really need to do is, stop beating yourself up, you can start doing this today and it does have to stop today. I’ve done and I’m sure if there is honesty everyone on here has done it. If you have to analyse a situation fine but don't start down the road of ‘ I should have or could have’.

if you are going through that amount of stress prior to a meeting her I’m sorry to say this but she would have blown you out anyway, it would have been written all over you and if you add in that you wanted to fuck her you might have even been put into the creepy box.

I'm not trying to kick you here just trying to illustrate the next stage.
There are two paths luke inner game shit which is promoted quiet heavily on here it does work but it’s a long and boring path and it starts with 20 hours of intense boredom from the offset but in its defence does have the desired affect. You should familiarise yourself with Kowalski’s posts they are pretty good when he's not banging on about some profound shit or telling members what a cunt I am. Jays post are also worth a read the downside is he did tend to go on a bit.

The other path is what most PUA’s do and that is simply to do it and keep doing it, she tells you to fuck off talk to her friend (yes I’ve done this), you get flaked, ring another girl, you can’t approach go out the next night and try again, etc, etc again and again and again...

There is a very intricate psychology to this and it works. Repartition and becoming desensitised to the outcome it will become second nature. So the first time you meet a HB10 you’ll fall apart like I did, once you’ve met 50 or so she’s just another girl with tits.

Let me give a very real example which might help, one of first girls I met I arranged to meet her in a park, I was pretty nervous and I just talked comfort shit the whole time, I was too afraid to esculate, she sent me a text later saying I was ‘really lovely' fucking lovely!!!! obviously that was the last txt I got.

The second time I met a girl I was slightly less nervous, the third a little bit less nervous, 4th 5th etc eventually I was kinoing then kiss closing and now if I meet a girl in the street I'll just kiss her within the first 5 minutes.

I hope this helps and I think I can see cracks in that brick wall.

EDIT I need to tidy the links up below there is one on flaking girls which you might find useful

Thanks for all the feedback guys.especially yours Knave much appreciated.I was at a really low ebb yesterday.Like Giant said we both just had a bad night last night.Im 100% sure i would have blown it yesterday with that hot chick,i even thought about flaking her before,i was more gutted i didnt get any experience spending time with her tho.I think that sucked just as bad as her flaking.
Agreed i beat myself up way 2 much and should stop straight away its become a force of habit in my life,that is extremily detrimental.
Ive already read loadsa both of those guys posts already trust.
Ok im gona go out tonight and keep going out and try to get used to the pub/club environment ive avoided at all costs for the past 5 years just doing that to start is going to put me at ease and make approaching easier.
You get better at this despite of yourself,through taking the actions?! oohh epiphany
Ive been hanging with the ex 2 day funnily enough its been pretty good,ive just been joking around and having a laugh,were becoming good friends again and its helped lift my spirits funny huh

KISS HER at the end of the date.

Tell her out loud.. say "Wheres my end of date kiss?" be dominant but playful

Edit: didn't read page 2, sorry to hear about the flaking..

First step is to love yourself, then all the chicks will love you too..

As for your ex.. DONT GO THERE .. EVER