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Shes shagging someone else (or at least wants to)

Womens brains have a simple prioritisation system:

first priority: interacting with bloke she most wants to shag / scrounge off of / have babies with (or some mix thereof).
second priority: everything else.

I'm afraid youve been relegated to "everything else" status.

Wow. You don't pull any punches, do you fella!

I guess its a fair point though, and certainly a possibility that you are right. However, I don't think that it is the case somehow, and I'm not just in denial.

She did say to me last week that she's having a really tough time at work at the moment and really stressed out - she said she feels like she needs to concentrate all her efforts on finding a new job atm. To which I offered to give her some space, seeing as she had suddenly gone a bit cold with me, and I took her words to mean that didn't have time for me. She immediately said she didn't want that.

Again, I know i'm sort of answering my own questions here, but I do feel like i need to talk about it and get some people's thoughts on the situation: maybe someone has been in a similar situation themselves?

Ignore the above post and take a chill pill, she just needs a bit of space. Let her contact you and be more casual. Your being too easy and too pushy.
Don't try and think about getting her into relationship or even talk about it being relationship (labelling it just confuses it) just enjoy spending time together when you can and make sure she enjoys it and your not too full on. I'm in similar situation with the girl I'm with at the moment, only I'm the one who comes across as needing a bit more space.

I used to get it the wrong way round where I'd think she was cheating but actually she was stressed about something and probably needed someone to lean on and talk it through. Could also be something like she loves you too much and its made her shut the whole thing down. Be the oak tree, stay rooted and strong, let her have some space but also try to get her to meet you somewhere during the day where u can spend 'quality time'.

my opinion.

it got a bit full on too quickly. I think shes getting bored.

you should absolutely get out there and see other chicks and maybe ease of the communiation with this girl for a bit. cause when a girls starts talking about how her life is busy with works and that shit... its basically bullshit (most of the time). i'm almost feeling frustrated on your behalf. Hang in there man!

Remember you're adding value to her, not the other way around!


Peace
Y45

We have all been here, its shite and there is a real danger of you now slipping into friend zone.

I kind of got a dose of oneitis a few weeks ago met this girl with a 'deep mistrust of men', she'd also been used as punch bag. seriously hot I found myself putting in so much effort to bed her, I broke countless personal rules, I invested so much time in her, I hate myself she continued to gave me mixed signals, but I still failed to bed her. I eventually came to my senses and she's been ignored since, she might come to her senses but if she doesn't so what.

I see nothing positive coming from your situation (sure I'd love to wrong), all thats going to happen is you're going to become more and more needy, she will become less less interested by this and in few months you'll be a mess.

cut her loose, ignore her requests, you're now the one busy, its time to change your facebook profile pic to you with your arms around a 10 in a nightclub your going to get this saturday.

1: get used to the idea it may be over

2: when people talk about their issues often it's an attempt to control you (concisely or subconsciously) by making you feel guilty.

3: If she said she loves you and you haven't said it back (say it back after she says it a couple of times not right away and only if you mean it) she may think you don't care and be moving on/gaming you to get you to say it.

Thanks for the wealth of advice fellas - I'd thank all of you twice if I could.

You have made me realise that this is easily the most chodey thread or post of mine ever! For which I apologise - I have just bitch slapped myself for being such a cunt.

Breaker: you are right - I have started to push too much, and I am verging on becoming needy (which girls can smell a mile off - it's like blood to a shark!). Also, good point about not calling it a relationship or whatever - it just puts too much pressure on things.

Carmada: spot-on: it is hard not to ruin things just because of the way I feel or because I'm frustrated about things. But I just have to take a chill pill and let things happen naturally.

Maxemillion: sound advice - I need to be the rock, not the needy fool looking for validation through her texts and phone calls: if she needs to talk then great, I'm there. If not, then who gives a shit - I got other stuff to do anyway.

Y45: I'm definitely gonna continue sarging: as I have said before, there is nuthin else gets your mind off a girl, like another girl's titties. That's what I need. Titties. (Plus, we need to get out soon brother - we keep missing each other!)

Knave: thanks for sharing your similar experience - I agree that continuing down this path of mine is just going to lead nowhere. I have to change tact
(oh and btw, I'm afraid I am a part of the "facebook is for cunts" brigade - but I understand the sentiment)

Kowalski: I sneakily read that post on my phone while in a meeting with my bosses, and I lol'd - you got me in trouble, you fucker!

Thanks again and much love,

Craigus

ye but he is right! maybe not put like tha, but if ur meetin a girl & she likes someone more, u get dicked around, or dropped...

not ness ur fault, they cuda known eachother for ages!