Ok here goes (deep breath) Geez where do i start.Right this could be a little long winded im gona try and put as much info down and be as honest as possible,in the hope that i might get better help, advice.
Not to be self depreciating ive been at a pretty low ebb these past few months.A few things have happened to change things in my head.First off i was given a copy of "The Game" which just blew me away (i particularly identified with Extra Mask and his story) but wow!!! I turned 29 and i dont know whether ive had a moment of clarity looking at my life or what but ever since my birthday ive been feeling restless and unfulfilled with where my life has gone and where it may continue to go.Thirdly my best friend who lives in Brighton has an uncanny ability to talk to women which makes me green with envy:s i want to mimic that.
Since getting the Game ive got hold of Vin Dicarlos "Pandoras Box" Various David Deangelo publications,Styles life challenge,How to be an alpha male etc many many books,dvds im currently working my way through.Ive not got through many but i like Deangelos perfect 10 idea and trying not to be a wussy which at mo i absolutely am:s
I am currently in a relationship and have been for 3 years that i am pretty unhappy in,i care deeply for this girl but she aint the one and have known this pretty much from the start.I got with her cos i knew she liked me and had very low self esteem,plus my parents were moving away and i was 2 chicken to live on my own.Why then you say am i still with her?? mainly because id rather have sex with someone im not into 2 or 3 times a month than not at all for 2 years like i did at one stage in my life.Im scared no one else will want me.Ive put weight on,im always broke cos of her debt so i cant buy any nice clothes i barely even shave anymore,i just think whats the point.To be totally honest im unhappy in every area of my life and have been for so long i havent realized till recently.
There is one other major thing i met another girl someone i met and liked years ago and lost touch,through the magic of facebook we have been reaquainted.Yep you guessed it i really like her, shes fun and quite fit well for me anyways lol. I think she is or was into me.But if i havent already im gona hit the nice guy box any minute now:S we talk everyday she txts me and rings me 2 sometimes we txt 60 times a day.She lost her job and home in the same week recently and ive been helping her sort things out.I hang out with her when i can get to where she lives every few weeks,but when im with her i talk and i can hear the words and i know im talking shit and its boring her but i dont seem to have interesting stuff to get her going,i know once i hook her i could be good ive got personality but my dating technique seems to be like flailing in the dark with a blindfold.Ive always has been very hit and miss at picking women up.I used to just aim for drunk womenAnyway now shes started calling me m8 gah and shes always with some guy called Adam,probs a damn natural who knows what he is doing snaffling another one from under my nose:'( which i pretty much knew would happen eventually.
I need help and advice i dont know what im doing i could watch videos and read books till the cows come home but ive no idea how to impliment these things into my life.I wouldnt mind meeting up with an experienced guy or 2 from this forum for a chat im based in the Northants area?? I just want a chance before its 2 late and im to old to meet and have fun with women like i want.Im not after 1000 notches on the bed post,if i meet someone whos fit with a great personality i want to be able to have fun with them instead of just settling for what i can scramble around for or worse have nobody for year after year again:'(

lose contact with that girl, be rid

why do u need to speak, dont make an effort, if u have nothin to say, dont

say to them... entertain me. ur over interested in her opinion, learn to be a cunt.

be that quiet cool guy, speak when spoken too.... then you can calmly think of what u want to say, in ur own time.... being queit around a girl takes BALLS, but not shy quiet... confident quiet, learn it

Thanks for the advice Phil you are obviously a guy who knows what your talking about by the amount of posts sent.But i do have questions
1. why lose this girl i like??the idea is i learn this stuff to pick her up!!
2. ok i get it nice guy=nowhere, cunt=everywhere
How do i get there Phil?? Thats my problem?? i want to be calm,confortable in my own skin and cool.The problem is im not and never have been especially around women i like

Suggestions for material,things that really set you in the right direction would be great also.Theres so much material out there i cant tell the difference between whats useful and useless

u dont have to be a cunt.... being a cunt would be going out of ur way to be nasty, or just being nasty..

u just need to not be assed about peoples view of you, or at least not show them your assed.

arrogance ... women love it.

and also, let her go, its going on a steady path to nowhere, u cant chase it, u wont catch it,

let her go mate, go get more, u have to go SUPER arrogant or a while, even go out ur way to offend girls for a few months... then you have been both end of the scale, and u can make yourself a nice persona somewere inbetween..

remember ur not gonna wind up a cunt, just a temporary one.

i did it for a while OFFEND OFFEND OFFEND, eventually the cold shoulder from girls becomes ammusing

you then start to realise girls opinions dont matter to you

once they begin to smell that, they will want to know u.

take women from a pedestal.... spend the next 4 weeks, when ur out on a night out, talking to girls and offending them but with a MASSIVE smile on ure face, then just turn away from them

DO NOT APOLOGISE OR BE SORRY... after 4 weeks, just start being urself again.

if it works, u will be urself, but more confident, cheekier & less assed about women.... u need to get over the fear of offending them...

just try it, let me know how u get on

Ok Phil i will do that.
Ill just accept i fudged this one with that girl and move on.
Night out lol ive barely gone out in three years as i dont drink or do anything anymore.Still what better excuse than this
I will try and be more arrogant with women.I will do to the best of my ability what you suggest.I have already had a message from someone in my area who can meet me so im getting offered help already.Big thanks ill deffo keep you posted on my progress with this
Ive also spoken to a personal trainer i know losing some weight will boost my confidence levels up 2.
If you or anyone else have further to add please feel free good or bad comments,i just want to give myself as much chance to change my life for the better.

good lad

I agree with Phil all the way on this..

My two cents:
Get fit. No excuses. Eat right, exercise more, do it for YOU not for other people. You got to love yourself man.
Sort out your relationship. Either end it, or make it work. Talk to her about things, she might feel the same way.
Stop worrying about things like your age and running out of time and going through a dry patch. Sex isn't everything in life. Get single, n if ur struggling, get help on this site

Yeh your right man i need to do it for me.Cos i dont like me.If you dont love yourself how can anyone love you!! (eerr did i just write that)
I will see if i can sort this relationship out one way or the other,ill do my best im not much good at talking anout emotions yet lol
Ok ill try not to worry about my age,it just sort of feels like im nearly 30 and ive wasted it all right now:S
I know sex isnt everything,but like i said previously, its tough when you seem to spend year after year with no interest or attention from anyone.I just dont want to do that again,spending long nights wondering what the hell is wrong with you.Why doesnt any girl even want to hang with me.Im sure you catch my drift
Im very hopeful and thankful already that i am getting help on this site
Cheers Al_phaD

The question is, do you WANT to sort out the relationship? If you want it to work, talk to her and discuss the issues (not emotions, just whats bothering you, im sure you could tell us so you could easily tell her that..), if you do NOT want it to last, end it ASAP in any way shape or form.

Why is it wasted? You must have MANY good memories of good times, from childhood, teen years, then in your 20s, think of the good times.. Write about them if it helps..

Its hard to offer advice if we don't know much about your current relationship/friends/career etc..

There are ways to fix the problem of no attention or interest, but cross that bridge if you turn single! If NOT, then focus on your relationship and make it work..