Good morning gentlemen. At 63 I am afraid I have been slow to learn, but I believe I have finally gained some insight. What I can offer you is a free t-shirt design, the name of the best book to carry around, and detailed instructions for handling the initial encounter. From there on out you are on your own ... but it should be plain sailing by then -- trust me. Enlist today, and you will have made real progress as early as tomorrow morning.

The essence is putting women in their place, and this is what the t-shirt and book do for you. Women will descend on you from all directions to argue about it, and it is then up to you to defend yourself as best you can. For a start, please follow my instructions to the letter. After you have developed the right gait, posture, and eye contact you might consider dispensing with the t-shirt and book ... but please proceed with care: caution is the better part of valour. Only abandon the weapons when you are really, really sure you can face at least a single woman (or young girl) all on your own. They are incredibly clever, especially with words, and the slightest error on your part can cause you to lose confidence.

The artwork, book reference and instructions are all on my website (there’s a link in my profile), but wait: before you visit I must warn you. My recent past has been very murky, and I have confessed it all on the website -- I would otherwise risk seriously misleading you. So please brace yourself to learn about my imprisonment for threatening my wife, and my certification as a lunatic -- all on my home page. I apologise if this offends you, but it would be wrong of me to hide the truth.

With that, tally-ho and good hunting -- and please get married as soon as possible. Those who are already married should only use these techniques under the strict supervision of your wife.

May i offer my opinion here.

WHAT THE F*CK??

Dude you cant be f*cking serious.

Hahaha.....tell me this is a joke!

mate , is he off his rocker ? lmao !!!

o duncan wat else are u on apart from crack i mean u cant be serious dude surely.

63... experienced then?

lol, ??

Hello Jaz,

I am so glad you picked up on my strange attitude towards pornography. It all sounds so simple to me, but nowhere can I find anyone who agrees! I have searched the Internet, contacted several feminist sites, written to three UK government ministries, visited the three leading family organisations in London, contacted my local MP, one other MP, the House of Commons, the leading author on the subject in the US ... all to no avail.

The fundamental problem is that women do not want any restrictions placed on their freedom to display sexually, in whatever way they please -- the ladies in Toronto have recently established their right to go topless down the main street! -- and so the so-called anti-porn feminists organisations are really a sham. They have no intention of using force, and so allow the anti-censorship feminists like Nadine Strossen and Camille Paglia to have their wicked way. The real clue is the fact that this is the one major feminist campaign that has failed. Think about it.

Number one, pornography exploits men to the tune of $2 billion every year; number two, it cripples them, so that they are unable to discipline those around them, sometimes for days afterwards -- particularly the girls. It is a grotesque descending spiral: the more flesh you see, the less able you are to get the girls to cover it up! We have no natural defences, because the Internet allows private consumption of a public display -- meaning one woman can seduce many men. Each porn actress in California’s San Fernando Valley now controls roughly 40,000 men to masturbate to orgasm every night! What power.

The only solution is regulation on a global scale, but it is men who will have to do it -- you cannot expect women to put limits on their own freedom -- and here in lies the problem. Even the rather modest idea of an individual man controlling an individual woman has become rather unfashionable these days -- a bride no longer promises to obey -- so the idea of men clubbing together to restrict women’s freedom on a grander scale sounds utterly absurd. In fact men clubbing together for pretty much anything, other than sport, is virtually illegal, since women will break it up, claiming equal rights.

Do you get the measure of the problem? As a consequence I see no clear way forward, and would very much appreciate any suggestions you might make.

Duncan, I take it all back - welcome friend.

Hello Dolphin,

No problem, and thank you very much for bothering to update!

Duncan like i told u over pm i read through ur page and im sorry man i shouldn't of judged u from the first messege hope u forgive and forget.

welcome 2 the forum brother.