The term "oneitis" (which is a stupid phrase) is generally used when someone meets a girl they like enough to want to be with for more than just sex. When this happens and it's not perfect everyone seems to default to the advice that there are thousands of girls out there so stop getting caught up with one, which may be the case for some guys but not for me from my experience. The original post was about a girl he wants a relationship with, hence my comment.

Abundance is abundant, there are thousands and thousands of them. Loads.

The lower your standards are the more abundance there is, the higher they are the lower the abundance is, surely this is not too hard to understand. My standards are just that, mine, I have very specific things I look for in a long term partner which differ hugely from other peoples and the specific things I look for happen to not be particularly abundant.

...and so by definition, the more that a guy is very fussy about who he has a relationship with (rather than just having her as a FB), the more that that relationship means to him!

ye there are, thousands... a good few thousand at least

this is true of what women call players....

men who wander throo women appreciate one they find that make them wanna stop

women dont see it like tha tho

infact, i wonder if the same is of promiscuous women??

Update: since Sunday, I have refrained from initiating any conversation with her, and up until my post yesterday, I hadn't heard anything from her. So I started to wonder if there was some truth in what Sapphire was saying.
However, last night she text me just to see how my day went etc - I kept my responses quite closed, and we exchanged a few texts. At one point, she asked what I was up to, which I know now is a signal for her wanting to talk on the phone, but I text back saying I was out having a drink with a friend of mine, then left it at that. She has now been texting me quite a bit today, and there seems to be a bit more involvement from her already - I haven't been falling for her 'woe-is-me, work is so hard' bullshit either. (I fucking hate playing mind-games, but sometimes you just have to in order to know where you stand)


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being intimate and emotionally involved with me has freaked her out. Much like Rebus' recent holiday hassle, this girl seems to have made a rule in her mind not to get too involved again for fear of being hurt, but has found herself breaking that rule with me (different rule, same concept - thanks Rebus for pointing out the similarities in that PM ).

So what am I going to do?

I'm gonna chill the fuck out.
She'll figure out what she wants in her own time.

And in the meantime, summer is almost here; girls are wearing less and less clothes by the day; we are about to embark on a 4-day weekend double-header; and to all intents and purposes, I am a single man.

Sometimes you just have to look at things from a different angle to realise that the glass is indeed half full, and not half empty.

Much love,

Craigus

thats better pal,

my advice wouldnt be to totally distance yourself but to throw her a bone now and again to show her you care and you are awesome, but dont get sucked into her drama
get out there and fuck some other girls

let her know if she pulls that shit again u will distance again

Of course.