That's one of the problems with the whole "PUA" concept.. there is so much contradicting information out there. "Talk about her interests" vs. "Have passion in your life and be an interesting person, talk about your passions, people will find you interesting.."

My successes are rare.. if I act like a normal person it will happen maybe once a year. If I go on an "approaching mission" and hit on every girl in the bar I'll get maybe 2-3 phone numbers, maybe 1 date, and every once in a while a date will go well. For reference, last time around I got about 3 lays after about 1000 approaches. Eventually it got to where the probability was so low I couldn't be bothered to keep trying anymore, so I settled for a relationship. (Bad idea in retrospect.)

What sort of commitment are we talking about, with your idea of "just going out socializing with friends"? How many times do you go out a week, and how long do you stay out?

No, it's both. One of my big problems is not having anything to say. I simply just can't think. I've had wing men that can talk the hind legs off a donkey, and they always seem to do really well for themselves.

I heard a theory once that all a conversation is made out of is "I statements and you questions" I think it was from a guy called Juggler. and one should just learn to balance between the two.

I've also had a wing man from France who could barely speak english. All he would do was stand there and ask question after question. Like some sort of crazy interrogation. He did alright for himself.

What do you think is your main problem? are you standing there with nothing to say or what you are saying is just boring?

Your friend seems to be breaking a lot of rules and still doing OK, although you can get away with a lot of bad game if you're foreign/exotic or extremely good looking.

I think I stand around without saying much, or when I do speak they tend to give 1-word responses so it's hard to engage them.

You may just want to question your general approach of doing things. If you're going up to as many girls as possible trying to get their phone numbers it's unlikely that you'll get into a long interaction, simply due to the fact that you're deliberately going up with the need to make something happen.

It's a bit hard to explain, but there's a million variables when you're interacting with people other than just the content of 'what you say'. Body language, the context of when you go up, your vibe, general random shit you can't know. This is why you hear contradicting information about the content of what works. Some guy might do awesome being high energy jumping around the place, some people might be super articulate. Personally my game is very chill and non committal. Different things work for different people and that's something you figure out through trying different shit until you relax into your own natural way of behaving.

A big issue with PUA people and the whole 'I don't know what to say' thing, is that they set the bar way too high, both in what they feel they should say and in the reactions they think they should be getting. There's this preconception that if you flip all the right switches by being super cool and interesting you'll get super positive feed back and everything will move forward super quick, like if you did everything by the PUA book she'd just drop trou and fuck you right there. At first guys go in, don't get a quick positive reaction so they bail early. Then after a while they go in, get an okay reaction, try to move shit along to quick and either bail too early or freak people out.

This mentality can manifest itself in subtle ways, like you give off this odd sense of thirsty urgency that people can sense and it makes them feel uncomfortable talking to you. If you've ever been out in a club with a group of girls and seen guys hitting on them you'll know what I mean, and what a relief it is when people just act normal.

The reality is, long interactions are what you want to be getting. They have peaks and troughs. You won't always be interesting, she won't necessarily be super interested the whole time. That's alright. Practise staying in conversations for longer without feeling the need for something to happen. Practise lowering the bar for what you feel you need to say. Hit up groups multiple times. Above all, take your time and chill.

I think Stein hit the nail on the head.

When I first started out I'd go out 2-3 times per week for a reasonable but cheap night out and I'd flirt with people who came across my path - more importantly I'd enjoy the experience of meeting new people. Guys and girls. It was interesting. Sometimes I was open, sometimes I was very judgmental.
I'm still much the same but without the devotion to going out.

I didn't necessarily go out with wings, just friends with a similar interest of having fun and pulling girls. That really worked for me because they'd tell me if I was "being weird" which was very very rarely