so funny story was out the other night and well i was pretty drunk, it was a female friend of mines b day, i was having a great time talking to all my girl m8s and my two male friends recently got gfs, anyway they told me to go approach a few girls. I was having such a great time with all the girls and didnt feel like it, i was thinkin this is doin wonders for my social proofing; im having a great time and with lots of girls. anyway i was hesitant to approach for watever reason, prob because i was having a good time already and didnt want to leave all my girl m8s, but i realised i was just talking shit. so i went to get a drink and there was two girls with a space in between them, i moved in.. now i was pretty fuking drunk, and i have no idea wtf i was saying, but my friend said he was watching for like 5 mins and it looked amazing, i had all this awesome body language, the girl was loving me and she was 'smoking hot', now the interaction was going great, then she turned and said i have to go out for a smoke.. now me being a drunken idiot thought, " hm smoker oh neg neg neg her", so my neg was this, " omg u smoke fuk off it aint going to work out between us now.." it was said playfully.. but still

i returned to my m8 and he was like dude wtf wen i left u were golden wat did u do..
"well bascially i told her to go fuk herself cos she smoked and got a jeirgerbomb", my m8 was just in shock..

anyway i prob shud of just grabbed her number as she was walking off? i didnt want to leave with her obvisouly cos i was about to get served a drink.. and wud have felt a bit needy following her to the smokin area.. any ideas on wat to say to a girl if she smokes?

cheers

interesting point...


....if you dont smoke, like myself, following a girl to the smoking area is deffo needy in appearance!

i think you had a good opportunity to neg. however, a neg is a backhanded compliment, so you have to make it mildly inulting-with a bit of fun int here too... yours was veyr strong, very direct!

i would have said... 'ooh you smoke? you know, smokers are jokers! your a joker now, i dont think i can take u seriously y'know!' said with a smile, maybe a breif sticking-out of the tongue, then smile and say, you'll see her in a bit...

Or if you really want to go out, just say that you dont smoke but its hot in the bar and u wana go outside for some fresh air!

Simples...

Picard

What's with all the Mystery Method style negs here fellas?? It all sounds so contrived. Personally if a girl smokes I don't like to make a song and dance about it, there's no need. Smokers get so much jip from all angles these days that if you have a pop at them about it they will more than likely think 'Here we go, another one of those kill joy wet flannels'.

If a girl says 'Im going outside for a smoke' whats wrong with just saying 'ok, I'll catch you in abit'. Instead of possibly making her feel guilty about her choice to smoke. If you want to continue the interaction outside and you don't smoke yourself just say 'I'll join you I could use some air'.

Hustler is right fellas. No point negging a smoker. In fact, do a search about negs, negging, dhv, dlv on this forum. It has been discussed so many times. There's a different between being playful and negging. I remember a few months back in a bar, there was a hen party with loads of women around. When I saw the bride-to-be on her own, I went up to her and playfully said "dont do it"...! And we ended up having a fab chat because she wanted to know why I said that, then her HB8 friend joined in...!

personally im not bothered if i girl smokes thats a way of starting a conversation in my eyes id go and ask them for a lighter and then its on, I personally like negging but you got to know who will take it and who wont some girls get offended by negs.

i use the smokeing area as a pulling place girls that on there own or a way to get girls to slip away from a group its the best thing since slice breed smokeing areas well it works for me ....

I agree with Hustler - no good can come from stripping away a girl's value just because of one minor indiscrepancy. I personally find girls who smoke to be more attractive - it shows me they're more easy going and open minded and this is a BIG thing for me (bearing in mind I'm at a uni full of narrow minded uptight individuals). Now I'm not saying for a moment "change your view towards smoking...ya prick!" - you're against it and that's fair enough. By all means oppose it, it's a nasty habit, but try not to hold it against people. Like Hustler said, just say "oh that's fine, I'm going to be hanging out with these girls over here if you need me later", just as you would if she'd announced a toilet visit.

But still, kudos for 90% of the interaction Bushido. Being in the moment and feeling rather than thinking is the biggest thing you learn. It's what you do when you're "in state" and the chicks love it. As for the smoking area, some of the best interactions I've had have been whilst having a cheeky ciggy on a night out. Obviously you're against smoking, but hang out with one of your friends who does when they go outside. It's spectacularly easy to get a conversation going.

Well said blanca i agree totally your dead right mate.

indeed good advice bro cheers

Its all been good advice fair play to the lads.