Saturday 10 May

Went out daygaming today. Stupidly I hadn't charged the battery on my phone and it went flat so I went home (joke).

As it turns out I didn't need it for any numbers. I did some approaches, nothing really worthy of note apart from two. One was an italian chick who I creeped out. This was an indirect approach. I don't seem to get away with trying to be smooth and indirect. It might work for me when I get better but at the moment they see right through me. I get rumbled easily, they get creeped and leave.

On the other hand I can say "stop there just a second..now you are absolutely gorgeous". It sounds corny, but when I say it they love it. I guess because I actually mean it and that comes across...authentic.

I'm just doing the process to see what works for me.

The other one worth mentioning (for the wrong reasons) was a younger girl, she only looked about 20, who was standing and gave me some eye contact as I passed her. I said 'hi' and she said 'hi' back quite enthusiatically, with a smile. With hindsight I can't understand why I didn't approach. I guess I had the 'too young' excuse in my head. I need to work on this hesitation problem a lot more.

markuk was out with me. He went on an instant date with the first girl he spoke to and they didn't come back...she was hot too. It's the first time I've seen a cold approach to instant date happen in front of my eyes. Cool.

EDIT: just remembered another approach worth mentioning - added

It's a learning process. You're gunna fail loads before you start getting more confidence & congruence.

The more you do it, you eventually feel these attributes growing.

Yeah, what I'm most aware of at this stage is I'm not completely in the moment when I'm interacting. I think that's just basically nerves. I can feel the real me is just under the surface though trying to get through but it's masked by nerves. Even though some of the women have tried to help me along I'm still desperate to bail.

As you say repitition and failure is the only way to reduce the anxiety and start to allow your personality to shine through.

For the first.......well, LOADS of them, your initial feelings will be one of crapping yourself with AA.

But yeah through time & more approaches you become less & less bothered by it.

Those who say my diary is just approaching & nothing else, that's fair enough but it's getting me better & building my confidence. In fact I've done very little compared to what I should be doing & I'm gunna pick it up again & step it up.

It's like learning to ride a bike; you'll fall quite a lot at first and even when you can ride the bike you'll still fall, just less often.

@Barney - The bike riding analogy is a good one. What I've been told is with the natural method the early learning is harder because you won't get much in the way of results for quite a long time and you'll get a lot of failure. So in the bike riding analogy it's like trying to first learn to ride on a unicycle instead of a bicycle. But in the long term it's better for self-development.

Everybody got hooked on lines and routines in the beginning because they did tend to give half decent results. But if you recall Tyler totally restructured RSD when he realised the lines and routines weren't working anymore. They had a shelf life.

@dan300 - I've noticed two things happening now: 1) Women aren't being as nice to me as they were when I was just starting off, especially in night game. I'm getting the cold shoulder a lot of the time. I remember Tyler saying this will happen as they sense you're more confident, they just 'kick the tyres' a bit harder.

And 2) I've noticed I'm already getting bored with giving a direct complement and walking away. So next step is to start hanging in there until rejection. I know there will be a higher failure rate as I do that. As you said, the more you do it, the more desensitized you become to it.

And you should step it up as much as you can. I had a thought tonight sitting in a cafe looking out the window onto the main street near my house. I didn't count but lets say 50 lone women passed by there in a couple of hours. If I was approaching a large percentage of them how long would it be before I got dates / lays?

Obviously it would happen much quicker than if I was going to a 'special' location and just approaching a few women. It's a no brainer. But I need to overcome some crap I have in my head that people are all watching me doing this and I need to stay under the radar. TBH I don't think they either notice nor care.

Catch up on the last few days.

11/5/2014

Went to a seminar on dating principles. Went for a beer with some guys I met there and two of us went on to do some street game then ended up in a night club. It got a bit messy and got home about 5am.

He was doing well with two girls he approached who were waiting to get into a club. They were bitchy at first but he hung in there and then they started to warm up to us. A wino appeared and tried to wreck it. I managed to distract him and he eventually went away. The girls didn't want to come with us so we bailed. In the night club there weren't many women and it was a case of titanium bitch shields all round.

However one girl I put my arm around at the bar was compliant and I could feel some chemistry going on, through the boooze haze. But there was a guy hanging around her who didn't look pleased. I think they were on a first date but it wasn't going well. I decided to back off. There were dodgy characters around that club. Some guys come in with no money and just steal any drinks they can get their hands on. Mine got taken when I turned my back on it for about 30 seconds.

12/5/14

Tired and a bit hungover next day but met up in town with the guy I had gone clubbing with the previous night. We did a few approaches but we didn't have the energy. One woman who I helped to light her cigarette was attracted but she was just in london for the day with her kids (3 I think) so I didn't pursue that one.

13/5/14

Coaching session in town with JB. Out of about 20 approaches the best two responses were when I was the most 'alpha'. One of those was a yad stop. Though an indirect approach on a norwegian woman went well too.

There was a comical one where a woman randomely got in the way of a woman I was about to stop. In the confusion, the one I was going for slipped passed me so I stopped the other one instead. Just gave her a compliment.

The last one of the day was interesting. Good stop from the front and she liked it. All the signs of attraction were there but when I asked her out she was reluctant to give me her number. I was getting quite tired by then so just let her go. She seemed dissapointed that I didn't push her to give the number. I'm not over-analyse these. Single interactions aren't really that important at this stage.

14/5/14

In the morning I got EC from a woman with her freind in the coffee shop. When they left and went there seperate ways I got after her and stopped her. Complimented her and she was attracted but I fell into the trap of boring conversation. I wasn't feeling it and didn't close.

Stopped a cute girl in leathers and told her she was cute. She said she was off to a job interview so I wished her luck.

Went into town and did 5 approaches.
- 2 were just direct compliment and leave.
- 3 were direct compliments, long interactions, then asking them out.

Of those three, two were leaving town that day or the next day.

Longest interaction was a cute chinese-american girl on holiday from LA who was sitting in the sun. I told her she looked lovely and eventually sat down next to her. We had about a 40 minute convo that went quite deep. We took selfie pictures of us and she gave me a hug. She was going to catch a plane to Paris then. I got the impression she was from a rich family as she was very confident and touring Europe on her own. When I said I wished we were as open and social in britain as they are in california she high fived me. She was high quality.

The third had a boyfriend of 5 years. This girl was a tall german girl with incredibly long slender legs and gorgeous brown eyes. I told her she was lovely. We talked for about 20 minutes I think. When I aksed her out she said unfortunately she had a boyfriend of 5 years. She was attracted and enjoyed the interaction.

On the way home I asked a Finnish girl wallking behind me for directions. There was attraction and it turned into a 10 minute conversation. I asked her out but she said she couldn't for logistical reasons and she was leaving town day after tomorrow.

As my last one for the day I told an american girl her hair was lovely. She thanked me and I went to have a beer outside a bar. She seemed to have gone up the road a bit crossed over and came back on my side. It could have been a coincidence. As she passed she didn't make eye contact so I took it that was the case but maybe I was wrong.

15/5/14

Up town again today on my own. I felt the grind as they weren't stopping for me. But kept going. Stopped a blonde dutch girl who looked like a model and complemented her. She said thanks but wasn't for stopping either.

I approached a Greek woman who I thought told me to get lost. But she clarified her GPS gets her lost, haha. She was fine but not for chatting.

The last approach was a lovely dark haired russian girl who was quite shy. I came alongside and said hi, asking if I could walk and talk with her for a bit because I thought she was really nice. She agreed and we walked and talked for about 10 minutes until we got to where she was going.

Before we parted I asked her out and she got her phone out to take my number. After a bit of discussion she finally gave me hers.

16/5/14

No response yet from the russian girl.

Went to gym in morning then headed up town again.

There was a lot of indifference from the women I approached. Maybe because it was friday and they couldn't be arsed. But I couldn't get to excited either so that was part of it I think (they just reflect your mood back at you). I think I just need a rest from it.

Three approaches worth mentioning:

1) Approached a hot polish girl who was walking behind me. Gave the compliment and she responded with "thank you but I don't want any company today", fair enough I bid her a good day.

2) Approached a dark skinned woman wearing a heavy woolen overcoat, even though it was 22 degrees. Told her I stopped her because she was very attractive and I wanted to say hi. She was speechless for a while. The she said "But I thought you were going to ask me for directions, what should I say now?". I said "you say thank you then tell me your name". We shook hands and chatted a bit. She was actually really nice and there was something very sexual about her but I noticed the ring while we were talking so I sent her back to her workplace as she might be late. She was still in shock as she walked away.

3) Got a few looks from a good looking woman with green eyes on the tube on the way home. I got off when she got off (the stop before mine) and did a yad stop when she was away from the station. I told her I saw her looking at me on the tube and that I thought she was lovely as well. She giggled and said 'sankyue' in a strong french accent. Then curtly stepped around me and went on her way.

I saw another daygamer yad stop a cute chinese girl who was walking in front of me in town. That's the second daygamer I've seen in two days. It's because it's summer I guess.

weekend starting 17/5

It's been a bit of a blur. Met up with markuk and Stein on Friday night. Then I got caught up in the FA cup final celebrations as the local team here won it. Thursday night turned into Friday night which turned into Saturday night which became Sunday night. Fuck, I need to calm down. I've not eaten or slept much. A crazy bender. Not a good idea but it happened.

Friday morning I went out locally and didn't intend to approach women but I saw such a hot girl soon after leaving the house I just stopped and told her she was absolutely gorgeous. She said thank you. Got a bit of social momentum going from that and just kept going with the approaches. I think I approached about 8 women in total. Told an irish woman who was with her husband I loved her accent. There was a moment of eye contact between us where I know she wanted to fuck me but it wasn't going to happen.

In the evening the bars were rammed with testoterone & booze fuelled football supporters. But it was good natured fun and I just joined in. I felt confident.

There was one nice woman I missed but saw her again later. She looked italian and was very very tidy. I stopped her in the street and told her that I had to tell her she was absolutely bueatiful. She really appreciated it, I can see it in the eyes now. She said "I think that's very nice of you to say that to me". then I spotted the wedding ring. I said "it's a pleasure, you have a great day".

I approached a gorgeous chinese girl and complimented her. We shook hands and then she asked me for directions to get somewhere. I though wtf is that about.

Yesterday I asked two girls out. One sat down next to me in the coffee shop. She was very atrractive, intelligent and had a career. She was Dutch. I had initiated the convo. She was nice in every possible way. After she left I went after her, told her she was very nice, asked her name and asked her out but she had a bf. She said it was very flattering what I had said to her.

The other one was a barmaid in a bar I've never been in before. She was an egyptian girl with cute dimples on her cheeks. When I had eye contact with her I started to get a boner so I chatted her up a bit then asked her out. She said she had a boyfreind on the other side of the world. I forced the issue by giving her my phone to put her number in but she refused. But she was attracted so I might give that another go another time.

I ended up getting shit faced dancing in a bar with some football supporters, got chucked out of a club for doing something stupid (because I'm more confident now drink makes me arrogant. I don't like that and it gets me bad reactions).I ended the night in a brothel. But I fell asleep while the hooker was trying to wank me off. What a waste of money.

It's been wicked but I need to eat, sleep and just have a boring day.