Hey guys, - am really new to all this so am just looking for some pointers to try & develop my own material. I have trawled forums & other places for some cool openers etc. & a lot of them are quite good, but a lot of the story material seems quite far removed from me, so I was going to use a few of them as boiler plates to develop my own ones, which will be easier to tell for me as they're true (if a bit embellished at times) and they'll be easier for me to remember / improv if necessary. This seems more real to me than just memorizing a bunch of stuff & repeating it verbatim over & over like a social robot


The possibly negative point to this is that I've really had some hurdles in my life & just by running through the stories here quickly I was hoping if you could steer as to whether these would be viewed as DHV or DLV, as I think in some ways they could be both, but as they talk about 'bad' stuff which I suppose happened to me they might do more damage than good ( the possible DHV element could come out of my triumphs through adversity)

OK.

#1 (& part of the main reason for my struggle for validation from people):

I'm disabled.

Not in a wheelchair, but I do have a limp & only partial use of my left hand. This occurred after an injury at school, it doesn't hamper me in any way really (for example I'm just about to embark on a RTW trip) but i'm not sure if talking about a childhood accident might make me seem like a whiner, when I'm just trying to make conversation & talk about stuff.
The up-side of this story was once when I started a new job, at a night out, I was explaining what had happened to me, including the accident / injury / hospitalization etc, in the same fashion that I'd told a thousand times before, however as I looked up towards the end of the story, I noticed that all 6 of my work colleages ( guys & girls) were completely captivated by my story & were hanging on my every word (which made me feel good) - but conversely I've also told the same story & been told "Wow, you know how to bring down the mood huh?!" - so I'm just wondering what views are, - should I find a way to tell it that has DHV spikes (if that's possible) - or avoid entirely? - at least IMO addressing it clears away any questions that the target might have about my limp etc. and should hopefuilly create a situation of ease(?)

#2 my childhood/adolescence Best friend killed himself when we were both 22!
(I'm not sure how I'd put a +EV spin on this one) - it might be more of a wait until we're opening up to each other - and only if the situation is right - type story.

#3 My wife left me for another woman(!).
- Not the cheeriest of topics either, but it does leave itself open to some humorous 'Ross from Friends' type analogies, which could be a stepping stone to other topics, - and as I understand these 'chains' can be vital in connecting together several pieces of material.

So yeah, - thoughts & views welcomed, please don't pull your punches, I'm a big boy & am happy reshape my ideas if your suggestions are good.

cheers,

- Andy

Mate, you sound interesting as fuck. You've had some crazy shit happen to you and I bet the emotional roller coasters and trials and tribulations you've gone through are off the charts compared to most people.

Relish in the glory that you've faced adversity and come out on the other side. Embrace the hurt and the pain and don't ever blame him or her or them or YOU. Accept the hand (no pun intended) life has dealt you and play it accordingly. And again do not blame anyone for anything that's happened, life owes you nothing and everything is circumstantial.

Its all about the connotation to which you relate your stories. I remember once a year ago telling some chick about when my cat died. I loved that cat, I had her from being 8-24. Her passing signified the end of my childhood. It was really raw when I told the story and right in front of me this girl started crying, I was embarrassed, I never expected such a reaction. When I asked her about it she said the emotion that came through when I told my story hit her hard.

I'l also add that never once in my retelling her did I want her to feel sorry for me or anything like that, I couldn't have cared less about her reaction I just replayed my emotion and was true to it.

Your stories are cool mate, don't ever ever ever sell yourself short and give a fuck whether someone thinks there boring or not.

So long as you don't tell them to gain sympathy or because you think you'l elicit an emotional response from someone you'l be fine. Tell them with conviction and tell them from a place of authenticity and I guarantee people with shut the fuck up and listen to what you have to say. Good luck my friend.

Ps - You said +EV, you must play poker?

^ this ^


Don't need Sympathy, - don't want it, just want to feel like I have something meaningful to contribute

^ very astute, - Nice spot! I wondered when I wrote that if anyone would get the reference!^

Thanks for your advice buddy, - much appreciated, I'll start work on my material tonight.