Abundance - cutting down?

[anthony]

Hey people,

since I started this journey off here, I thought I'd add this to this forum. Basically about how its tough to find a balance, and how 'abundance' is more complex than you might think.

I'd like to add however that I've had some incredible times through all this, sexually and none.

thoughts welcome, especially from those with experience (and those who I know).


the journey never ends, but the interest in PU-specific stuff does I suspect


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Hey people

A while ago I got into game - in March/April. I got results pretty quickly - numbers, contacts, dates, mLTRs. (I was social before game - I would speak to people randomly etc...). I pretty much use natural content, but I have learned some stuff through reading, then doing.

And then pretty much I've been in continual abundance since about 2 months starting it. I'm now seeing around 5 women regularly (with around 3-4 I could see if I wanted to, or have frozen the relationship etc).

About 6 weeks ago, when seeing around 4ish girls a week, I realised my life was massively out of balance. Instead of going out and doing fun things, reading, or playing music, I was removing the condoms from around my bed, continually being on dates, or cleaning female hairs from my bed. It kind of clicked to me that this was a life out of balance, and it was time to try and slow things down.

Thing is, it’s really tough to slow things down. If I see/meet a girl I like, it’s so tough to stop yourself, that I end up getting back into this bizarre/ironic predicament! Too many women, I really want to see them all, and then I stop doing other things (logistically, working full time, it’s impossible to fit all my interests in).

Anyways, I wanted to air my opinion on this. From what I’ve read on *this forum! *, is its mostly sex-obsessed people, or people who want to get there. Is continually ‘sarging’ (from what I’ve read, some don’t ‘grow out’ of it) the sign of a happy, well-balanced individual? I don’t think so.

People often get into this community wanting to find some kind of happiness, but this might be a bit of a rabbit hole. I think I might have been more balanced before all of this!!!

AnthonyD

[Simply David]

Sometimes I wish there were more hours in the day, or the week, or the year to fit it all in...

Unfortunately it is limited and I've struggled to get the balance right. I'm moving away from the idea of mLTR's as a viable concept cos I've failed with them. Doesnt stop me number closing a lady if I like her, just think twice about calling her later.

For me personally its been a journey of improving the quality of women I get involved with. I.e. Quality vs quantity. But gosh - I just love women.

I also think Im growing out of the idea that my happiness should come from another person.

I think its a dangerous idea!!! (Beware people!!)

Much love.

Xxx

[nova]

Interesting post anthony. I have currently got one girl on the go and it is clear to both of us that she is just a f*ck buddy, which is ideal for me. I have been pretty happy plodding along with this for the past month and been totally lazy about hitting on any other girls at all.

However I am now wondering about expanding on this a little and seeing what it might be like to get another girl or two on the go, so it's interesting to read your thoughts on this. This is arising as I kind of miss the whole excitement of chatting up girls and want to see how much more I am capable of. I feel I have a hell of a lot more to learn.

Like Tyler said in The Blueprint, he is in a healthy relationship because he picked his girlfriend from literally thousands of girls.

[anthony]

dolphin - interesting stuff, especially "moving away from the idea of mLTR's as a viable concept". When I read The Game, I thought that would be the pinnacle of lifestyle! I too am moving away from it slightly. A good friend of mine, previous PU-man, and now natural social guy, has for a while stopped seeing women at all for a while, so he can concentrate on other things! I admire his self-discipline if nothing else! I find it tough to do that, maybe because I don’t want to ! Sometimes I think to continue the mLTR thing you need to control both the girls’ and your own emotions. This isn’t always easy.

nova - explore at will, this is your journey!!! “I feel I have a hell of a lot more to learn” - damn right, there probably is - tough to know when to stop though! I used to think of Mystery – he once talked about 5-for-5 – when you open 5-sets, you close 5-times. This gives a tangible end-point to ‘mastery’. 5 make-outs, numbers etc. Actually I don’t think too much of Mystery (especially in terms of his goals) any more.

I think it’s interesting how many PU guys (including many experienced and capable guys) have posted about becoming sick of multiple girls etc. Maybe it’s a period of men’s lives people go through – to play the field a certain amount. I’m certainly still going through it. Some start the other way around – committed relationship go savagely in seek of sex (read Sapmi! )

Adam - I've read some of his stuff. quick definition: "self actualization - the achievement of one's full potential through creativity, independence, spontaneity, and a grasp of the real world." ~Good stuff, I'm always working on this! I really liked the blueprint, in a social sense many things made sense (and I kind of knew before in many cases due to natural learning). I've read many religious and spiritual writings, and there is no 'easy fix' for me. But continual learning is a good thing I'm always working on my life to try and improve etc.


Anthony

[TheRegulator88]

Im like nova in this respect but having less success. I simply havnt gone out there and approached women recently. Im training 5 days a week and doing my job, but i know i have loads of spare time. I was really positive since joining the forum but since ive built up a few hrs with my job and saving some nice cash for once (instead of being stoney broke!) my balance has totally gone out of sync. Downloading the blueprint (video version) as we speak so im hoping that and jonny soporno's stuff will kick me back into shape!

I would go out tomorrow and do some solo game in the day but i feel like i would if i was walking into an exam room without revising. I've lost my confidence and become frustrated about it at the moment. Any tips for knocking some much needed balance into my life!?

[nova]

Originally Posted by TheRegulator88

I would go out tomorrow and do some solo game in the day but i feel like i would if i was walking into an exam room without revising. I've lost my confidence and become frustrated about it at the moment. Any tips for knocking some much needed balance into my life!?

I can only suggest getting straight out there as soon as you can mate. Starting is the hardest part. Once you do it a few times you'll be back in the zone.

Start nice n slow with simple stuff like asking for directions. The first hurdle is realising strangers are more approachable than they first look.

[Shark]

Firstly TheRegulator88 I am totally with Nova - I spent weeks reading up on theories, openers, routines, trying to devour all the knowledge there was until I realised I was in danger of becoming someone who never got out there as there was always a new theory to learn...go out tomorrow armed with what you've got and if you run dry open with anything; 'Hey i am new in the area - what's the coolest thing to do around here?' or something - with this line you can open solo girls or guys as well as very large groups of girls/guys too. (I say guys too because if you are starting out at opening the AA is usually about talking to strangers not just girls...by talking to guys too it will speed up your progress and also make you comfortable talking to random guys for when you have to get them on board during mixed sets)

Anthony - I am comfortable admitting to you guys (love you guys!) that like a lot of people I guess, I got into Game and it was so inviting and exciting to me because I was shit with girls before. I can see why so many Guys go into overload with this material and then realise their life was out of balence! lol I 'gave up' for about 3months when I found myself in London 4 or 5 nighhts a week Sarging and Gaming...I was doing nothing else and blowing all my cash on bars/clubs/cabs and resturants. I too like you Anthony am slowing down a little and looking for a bit more of a balence in life. It is interesting to hear everyone else's take on this thread...good post Brother!