• Alliances, competencies, role-plays, core value.

Blueprint Part 11. Day Two.

Left out – State issue. Focus on state too much can cause you not to go into it. 1. Don’t resist it. 2. Take right action. Your mind may try to block you from the nimbus, how do we shock our way out of that?

You are not your mind – it’s social conditioning, memory, labels etc, you can take over.

Force it – flying an aeroplane story. You know how to talk, you know how to be confident.

Math homework – procrastinate; after you have done a few problems you’ve accessed that part of your brain and you begin to flow. Access that part of your brain – force it. Trust yourself.

1st guy – approaches goes badly – procrastinates and feels bad

2nd guy – just keeps going, keeps getting blown out till he accesses that part of his brain.

Don’t sit and hope something is going to happen. Do it till your mind goes ‘ok, here’s the manual, god this guy is obnoxious!’

How do you go into the ocean? You Jump in!

Conflicting reality

People have their own sense of reality. I’m a hot girl, guys want me, guys chase me – when that breaks down – heroin dealer story.

Women have a simultaneously strong and weak reality. It may seem a woman is very centred but if you haven’t studied it you aren’t going to be centred – unconscious competence get a bit un-centred and don’t know how to react.

How does a girl show strong polarity (draw of attraction/magnet) vs a guy. When you have a strong polarity the girl will feel it standing next to you.

(Be naturally screening, get in touch with what your natural 10 is rather than trying to hook up with every girl.)

Congruence tests – So the girl can trust you if shit gets crazy.

A woman can’t freely express her feminine side if a guy can’t be masculine. 1. She wants to feel the strength of your reality. Prodding you to justify yourself, saying obnoxious things to make you jealous or insecure, being cranky or throwing tantrums to see if you’ll be dragged into it, calling you out on your worst features to see if you’re insecure about them, trying to get you to qualify yourself to her so she can have to selector role, accusing you of things.

Advanced supplication – acting indifferent to make her like you. But you have to do this at the start to learn how to do it.

She wants to feel you’re centred in your reality.

Are you dictating the energy or are you falling into it?

Man Action, Girl Reaction.

Stay positive, stay upbeat and act through your own intentions. Tap into something inside yourself for your mood.

Acting through your own intentions – not neediness, lack, programming. Something you come to over years, peeling back the layers of programming and social conditioning.

In state – take the drink attraction goes up. Another occasion you’re acting like a chode and you try and use that as a move or a trick.

Pua’s - they tried something and liked it and worked but it worked because they were acting through their own intentions.

Own everything you do.

Polarity “I’ve got to act through my own intentions, I can’t react” Negative affirmation, bizarre thought loop to get caught in. Have fun. Be authentic.

Chaos vs Grounding Energy

Girls Polarity :

• Being totally fulfilled and enraptured by the energy of the environment.
• Dressing and walking in a way that gets attention
• Enjoying whatever she’s doing and not scanning the room for people to meet
• Being in touch with your feminine side = being well rounded.
• Letting the energy of the environment flow through her and even dancing on the same spot for hours. Even playing mock bi sexual with her friends.
• Rarely being the one to call, ask out or re initiate the conversation. Her unconsciously learned behaviour is be the prize.
• Losing interest in sex if she comes out of a happy emotional state.
• Only being moved by the energy that she likes the most – better than the one she’s already experiencing. Where the social energy is the woman goes. Why looks have so little to do with this
• Rewarding good behaviour with little bits of attention.


When our brains think we’re getting value our brains will stick there. If she’s n the warm end of the pool she can stay there for hours – dance on same spot etc. If you’re shopping for groceries with tom cruise it’s the warm end of the pool. Hot party people stay, not they leave.

Guys think it plays like - So you wanna get out of here? And it’s on for sex immediately. No - When you get her out of the club she’s in the warm end of the pool – she just wants to stay in the party. She’s just responding to her emotions.

If you don’t keep her in a good state she will flutter off it gets you very reactive. The more you invest. Girl with a very strong reality – she’s totally fine without you. Totally happy with the environment etc.


Typical date – I have to take her to the restaurant, flowers etc keep her in a good emotional state.

How can a guy do this in return? Part 12.

Blueprint part 12

Does a girl want a guy who is that affected? - American pie finishing in a few seconds.

She wants they guy who’s attracted but she wants to play the game of trying to get the attention / make him respond. Be centred.

Flipping the script – you are using feminine polarity s you can get asked if you’re gay.

What can a guy do without flipping the script to assert masculine polarity?

• Being at home in the environment / My House / Everyone here is my friend. When you don’t woman can sense it, it is written all over you.
• Carrying yourself with total confidence and even a playful cockiness: subtle level, not exaggerated.
• Being the source of grounding energy and asserting that what you have to say is funny (self amusing), interesting and worth being heard
• Leading the conversation in the fun / whatever direction you want it to go in: If you are interested in the convo you don’t have to change it.
• Not taking orders, justifying yourself or responding to nonsense
• Positioning yourself as already chosen by every girl in the environment and you are choosing the girl that you like – I see what I want I take it – if you don’t how can she trust you?

The only guy in the world who wants validation even from a girl he’s not interested in at all is a pick up artist. A real man isn’t going up to a woman trying to get validated he’s just being the selector.

She’s feeling that you’re the chooser and you will do whatever you want.

She feels protected and fun in your presence but if she doesn’t hold your attention you may stray.

Women want to feel a range of emotions.

Guys – happy , chill, adrenaline, getting off – sweet spot.

We think women are crazy she thinks we’re rigid/confined/restricted.

The environment is always changing - men need to draw state from within. Women can draw state from the environment because they want to experience all their emotions.

State is more self generated than externally generated for a guy, drawn from yourself not from the environment.

Slow down, dilate perception; you can feel good within yourself. That centeredness comes from within, you’reonnected to your masculine power. Won’t be naturally qualifying yourself or doing little jittery things.

Slow down the scatterd min, be conscious but don’t be self conscious.

Smooth eye contact, not flinching, she’ll feel it she’ll say ‘I like that guy, I don’t know why’

Change how you feel tell yourself to ‘be happy!’. Pump your own state at will, choose to feel good at will.

Slow down, stop thinking of all the petty me problems just be conscious of it and aware of it around you. Be conscious not self conscious.

Are you connected to your primitive wild man? Can you scream ‘yee ha!’, like a cowboy? You’re not going to find that by trying to feed off other people’s reactions you bring it from within yourself.

You don’t think about going and approaching her you just go and do it.

Social conditioning disconnects you from the depth and only makes you see the surface of things – what do people think of me etc.

You can not be the source of grounding energy if you’re drawing state off your environment.

You can draw state from the environment but you always have the ability to go back to drawing it from within.

Sex is an outpouring of energy it’s an expression.

Tyler still helps the guys put the chairs out at seminars ants to be apart of it can draw state from within

Stop trying to chase high status people, people are just people, it’s just an expression it’s an outpouring. All people are equal to you. Experience the depth of the girl rather than the surface level.

Why do women want their hair pulled / spanked? Want to feel a range of emotion. Huge expression of emotion for them.

Guys try and draw state from the girls reaction.

If you naturally draw state from your environment you’re not going to be able to draw it from within when you approach that girl.

If you use a bunch of tactics and get a good result you’ll think it’s the tactics but it was probably just that your state was always pumped and it’s your state that gets her, you could be saying anything, if you’re connected to that masculine polarity you find success.

You’re totally in the zone – then you start to think, is this cool etc then the attraction goes down. As soon as you let it affect you – you lose.

Don’t teach indicators of interest because don’t want your state to be coming from that.

Your state must hold.

Two button pushes: 1. Entertainment – if you can entertain her she’ll be drawn towards you. 2. Pushing away / disrupting her reality so she has to re assert it by getting you to act the way she wants. Easy make out – get away from me, your crazy, go go, come here come here . . . Pitfall – you feel like you’re this attractive guy but you don’t have the masculine polarity so when you stop she leaves.

When you have the polarity a different set of rules apply to you.

The surface layer of the conversation may be generic, but the depth. . .

Blueprint part 13

People like authenticity. Don’t change who you are to accommodate someone else. 90% of the time people will appreciate it. Don’t care what everyone thinks of you.

Pro active: a series of habits that when they come together handle your problems automatically. If you have the habit of going out all the time that would handle the problem of getting girls for you.

Reactive – this girl ill act like this, this girl ill do this. Constantly trying to react to her standards. If you live up to the standards of society you’re constantly living in reaction.

Acting through your own intentions is like a magnet she’s drawn in when you’re not she’s pushed away.

Most guys overestimate what they have to say – it has to be great. Don’t be afraid of being entertaining but you have to be entertaining yourself.

Thoughts.

Knowledge – understand that it works. Approach a woman with nothing in your mind, just feel good.
If you fumble your words she’ll sense you’re scattered. Lower your standards, you don’t have to have the perfect thing to say. What you have to say is valuable purely because it comes from you. What you have to say is interesting not because of the content but because you find it interesting.

You only run out of things to say when you want something.

Trust in yourself.

When you’re walking up just think ‘oh lets expand out the party, let’s see if she’s cool, let’s ask this question’.

When she can sense you’re feeling good in your own body and not thinking a step ahead she’ll think who is this guy – it’s playfully cocky. Staying with it – not trying to diffuse the tension, not going into your head.

Childlike I see I take attitude.

Notice when a girl is being needy how unattractive that is. Taking value – also an icky feeling.

Don’t think of how she’s going to respond, have fun with her, challenge her. Let her find out what will hold your attention and where your personal boundaries are.

Don’t judge, interpret, compare or label her words. You’re not in a business meeting, trying to cure a disease, just enjoy the moment. Rip down the opaque wall and just hear the resonation in her voice, the words she’s saying, her vibe, her energy. Don’t resist the awkwardness, don’t look for the next thing to say, stay with the tension; while she’s waiting anticipation is building, don’t flinch and retreat into your mind, your shelter of judgements, interpretations etc.

Sasha Barron Cohen – funny because he can stay with the tension, create chaos and stay with it.

Trust – be able to trust yourself.

As a grown man – you are responsible for you. If you get in a car crash, plane accident no one will bat an eyelid.

Main responsibility is holding your awareness where it counts.

Most people are playing out imaginary scenarios in their minds but don’t know how to be present. I can’t be happy right now – maybe I can find a happy ending in the future. Hollywood enforces misery – it’s ok you’ll reach your happy ending.

Your awareness can only go where is useful.

You can think about the future but don’t obsess about it. That is not acting through your own intentions that is acting to escape, mentally.

As long as you stay in the moment everything is fine. You can drive without driving into the oncoming traffic as long as you staying in the moment. The moment itself is just fine.

I don’t like this situation – whine – someone comes and fixes it. Kid has toy he like that reality, toy breaks he cries, parents fix the toy. If you just complain that will fix the problem, ultimately that won’t fix anything.

You can’t be a guy who can’t handle what is in front of him.

Stop getting in your own way – don’t allow your awareness to go into some stupid future situation.

In the moment, present.
1. Focus is on the moment that you’re in and what’s going on in the moment / what’s unfolding
2. You faculties are not being spread too thin by focussing on past or future events
3. You melt into the moment rather than struggling against it
4. Full trust in your faculties to carry you forward as issues come up

Strength of presence is like a muscle.

How many of your thoughts are useless and repetitive?

Be present - Take things as they come.

Blueprint part 14.

Your faculties – you’re autopilot responses. They can only give you what you need to where your awareness is.

Creative from yourself. Do things that you enjoy

Create the reality that you want.

Ayn Rand - John Galt – wears his clothes with integrity. Other character has art in his attick for him.

You can merge into the environment. High society or having a blast in a dive bar.

Trust in your own faculties.

When you get nervous trust in your faculties, if you’re in the moment your faculties will take care of it.

If you’re in a fun environment merge into that don’t resist it.

Walking through the world with ease. Core confidence, masculine polarity.

Move with the current of the world not against it.

You are not above or below - you are a part of the whole. You can be dressed formally/casually and having fun.

Show anger when its time to show anger, grief when grief, fun when fun.

The guy who’s having the most fun has the attraction from women.

People build their confidence from external factors – clothes, friends wtc. But you don’t need to you can just be a guy. Not moving against the world going with the current.

Being successful with women is an after thought when you are the fun sociable guy.

Caveman – How can a girl tell that that’s the good caveman? He walks through the world with ease, he knows his ease. Most people try to surround themselves with material goods and superficial things / don’t know how to melt into the moment.

Most people are ‘wilted’ they see the girl then try and snap into the cool guy persona. You have to be it – being not doing.

Inner game – biggest excuse not to approach. Chodes.

Jus be cool, chill, make a connection, move venues, go home together. When you get good at this you’ll realise it’s this easy.

Guys will talk about getting good with women all day but when it comes to doing something about it they’d rather sit on the sidelines.

As far as your mind is concerned you perception of reality does not have to be objective it just has to bee enough to keep you going. Our mind only perceives what is useful

If you’re reality has kept you going so far it’s easier to bury yourself in that reality than think through the headaches of something new. Your mind will say ‘’screw off man were doing fine with this reality.’’

A sort of instinct that some people will not accept the new you.

Blueprint Part 15


Strength of reality – how firm you are in your beliefs. How much that rock solid fixed level of certainty draws others in. Web reality – knock one line out it’s going to fuck the whole deal; links one belief to another belief. Hard not to do this, what creates very difficult people.

Delusional confidence guy – doesn’t see negative feedback. Has a dominant reality – sucks her into his state.

Response Junkie – see every little response, get shy or creative, perfect line for every response. State drops if he doesn’t get the reaction.

3rd guy – can see the negative feedback but it’s irrelevant you’ve made the distinction it doesn’t matter.

Be water don’t be rigid. Have a flexible belief system.

Re ordering perception to preserve the map.

See yourself in others, be a part of the whole vs the selfish gene. Dawkins seems very rigid.

The map is not the territory. Every concept we have is just a concept, it’s just a label on the reality.

It didn’t work

Let’s get to the future. Happiness is not right now. A lot of people get in to success with women and it turns out not what they expected.

Learnt to get into state by controlling the social feedback vs just talking and feeling good in your own body.

Your mind is inherently a lazy mind. It tries to conserve energy – you have to snap your mind into it. If you don’t read for a couple of years you get tired when you finally pick a book up.

Your mind doesn’t care if you hate your life.

Women will date a jerk guy but as long as he has high value the mind doesn’t care.

Who wants to uproot themselves and go looking around when they might not find what they’re looking for.

Wolf pack – everyone wants to be the alpha male but it’s a lot easier to be the beta. You have to expend more energy, someone might step up / haters.

To become this new guy to get there there’s an expenditure of energy.

Two types of guys that get laid a lot – leader of men and wandering nomad.

What you think of other people is often what you think of yourself.

A guy that has the right mindset – two good approaches just focuses on them

A guy who has 9 great approaches and then one bad one has a success barrier will focus on that one bad set.

Only give positive feedback. Negative feedback kills state and puts someone further into their head.

Most guys go out they get a negative approach and then they focus on it. Forgetting about all the positive ones. Open your mind up; allow yourself to focus on the positives.

Real Social Dynamics Nation / Real Social Dynamics Wiki - Main Page

FBI training people don’t do this don’t do that etc a big difference when they took someone and gave them the three positives do this and do that.

Success barriers – people will focus on the approaches that enforces their reality.

If you have an empowering self concept you’re gonna focus on the positive. If you’re a chode you’re going to focus on the negative.

What your reality is and how that draws people in. Also how your reality can hold you back or empower you. See the best in yourself and see the best in others. Cut yourself a ton of slack. If you see the best in others you’ll believe they want to see the best in you.

Blueprint part 16. Day four.

This is not ego based learning: needing to know every piece of info before being able to go out.

Social conditioning ---- Self esteem and authenticity.

The program is designed as signposts to move over.

Draw state from within and see the depth of things.

Internalisation - When you have something on a level where you never have to think about it again.

RSD = Deep Identity Level Change.

When you move up on the totem pole you have to think more.

Success barriers, why would the mind have this? Mind may not be able to handle something – may be put in paralysis.

Obama – his mind has to be set up a certain way to handle all the social, political etc pressure.

You – get the harem? Can your mind handle it – congruence tests – are you centred enough in your reality?

When you’re in a higher status you’re world is going to go into disarray. Using the blueprint you can be comfortable.

Ok I want the perfect 10 – but can I emotionally handle it.

Screw things up – learn from it. Make a jackass out of yourself with women and then you learn to just chill. Put yourself in a position where mistakes might occur.

Life is about moving to your centre – the journey is meant to be enjoyed and is your life.

Anticipated responses = assumptions

1 whether a person of your status can be expected to be treated badly or well.
2. whether people are trustworthy or manipulative - friendly or mean
3. whether there’s an abundance or scarcity of people in the world who could like you

Do I like myself? Would I hang out with someone like me? If I saw a guy that looked like me with a hot girl would I think it worked or not.


Believing a girl can like you just for you. This is the whole deal.

Having general social skills will instantly help with attractive women.

Vibing is cool, trying to show off – approval seeking isn’t. When a guy walks up and anticipates she won’t like him just for him he’s inside his head.

Un enlightened level – check out this watch girl then – look at this routine – let me show you this about you.

A guy doing it just for fun rather than coming from a place of lack. Improve the vibe and make it fun.

If you approach a girl who does not believe herself to be attractive – she thinks you’re toying with her, patronising her. This maintains her reality that guys are big jerks etc.

Better to approach the hot girl she’ll think it’s genuine.

If you have a girl back to your place and you don’t act on it the window will close.

Make the party, make everyone have fun and naturally hook up.

All the ‘respect’ stuff girls put up is for guys because were stupidly judgemental. The best of the best – no judgements, they know the deal, girls can have fun around them.

Someone who assumes everyone in the world is his friend. He’s going to have all these behaviours.

People are always trying to maintain their reality – they are trying to make there world make sense. Most people are not willing to shake up their reality – take on new bearings. When things conflict with the blueprint you have to take that on board as well. People are seeing the world through a lens take off the lens – deal with reality head on.

Self fulfilling prophesies – by the strength of your beliefs the reality in your head becomes the reality of your life. Your mind is always seeking out evidence to support your existing beliefs.

If you believe people are out to get you – the person with the strongest reality wins – you will suck people in to do that to you. You have to assume the best in people. The guys who are great at this he knows how to make a self fulfilling prophesy that girls are well into him. A guy who’s great with women it’s like he’s walking up talking to a friend; he’s assuming she’s friendly.

When you’re girlfriend acts like a bitch – you say, ‘I love it when you’re really friendly’ etc; people want to be congruent to their reality. Shape the identity you want for her. Sometimes you have to call out her bad behaviours, it’s a mix.

If you get insulted when someone tries to tool you they go ‘got him’ - if you laugh it off in his mind he’s going to think he was joking. Stronger reality wins. The woman is looking at whose reality is gong to win out. As long as there is no shift in state there’s no need to win the verbal sparring match - Un-reactive.

Don’t be a frame control addict where you think everything is a shit test.

You only acknowledge the reality you want.

Blueprint part 17

Micro behaviors. Sub communication.

Pupils dilate – when you can look a girl in the eyes and your eyes hold steady its showing you’re not going into your head.

If she moves one way are you a little too eager to follow? Or are you just chill.

If you doubt yourself in any way she’ll say no.

“here, come on lets go” lead.

Self fulfilling prophesies and anticipated positive response.

“Could I have it?” no.

You can make a girl laugh just at the spots you believe it, just by creating that vibe. Same anticipated response.

Being in the moment is the mastery level of this. Don’t go into your head at all.

Flinching or retreating into your mind – opposite of anticipated responses.. Doubting yourself. If you retreat into your head or flinch anticipated responses don’t work.

The simplest way to not think about this stuff is to just have fun. When you’re in the science lab be a scientist when you’re out be a person. If you think about this stuff you could become less sociably savvy when you’re focused on it too much. You have to disconnect yourself from it when you go out.

Offering value - If you don’t believe women enjoy sex as much if not more than you do when you invite the girl over you’re going to be taking value. Offer value to everybody!

The closer you can get to your integrity the bigger the payoff – stop taking value from people. Sex is as valuable to the woman as it is to you.

Take a deep breath, slow down and feel good.

Fully trust in a foreign set of bearings. Learn to walk – fall get up fall get up, trial and error till you create an assumption where you never have to think about it again.

It’s ok to approach strangers, you’re not going to go tap tap and you’re hand is going to blow off.

If you’re going to sit on a chair you’re not thinking ‘ok, like I learned in the seminar, here we go, total belief!’

When learning to be a leader you’re not going to do it straight away and you may make a jackass out of yourself but you have to learn the process before you internalize it.

Are we taught to speak to strangers? No. But this is second hand knowledge.

You don’t know you can’t be a big pimp because you never tried. You just listen to the social conditioning that tells you you can’t but , you never tried so how do you know?

Putting in a contact lens at first you flinch till your mind gets reference experiences that its ok then you stop flinching.

To get unwavering belief you have to totally assume it’s going to work and have no reaction on the odd time it doesn’t.

It’s no big deal – when you get good it’s just some cool thing you can do if anyone who doesn’t know wanted to learn it they could as well.

The halfway point is indifference – you cannot cultivate total belief.

Go out. You can gather references that it doesn’t matter what people think of you. Go out and out and then you cross the indifference threshold. When you’ve let go of the outcome it’s like a loss of neediness.

The system is designed that if you’re not good with girls you won’t get them. You cannot get confident unless you have what women want. You have to pummel you’re brain with so many references that you scramble your brain. Eventually you’re mind goes – it doesn’t matter what anyone thinks of you. Then you become indifferent and then the groups open.

Stifling – being out of your head vs inside your head. Hi my name is … when you have the richness – the unstifledness that’s what she’s relating to.

When out by yourself just try and cross the indifference threshold as quickly as possible. Don’t try and be confident just try and cross the indifference threshold and confidence will then flow through. When you cross it you’ll see that this is a better personality to have.

The same way a nerd can become a goth is the same way you become a champ. Slow progression

Once you’ve had the click when you see it’s better to be gregarious than to avoid people your mind starts RASing on the super micro behaviors of really cool guys.

There is no magic pill. It’s a process you go through. That’s why when you learn this there can be such a massive shift in who you are and your personality.

Blueprint part 18

How do we pass the indifference threshold quickly?

You want to get great results, you want to get reference experiences so you can internalise this new sense of reality .

How do we get unstifled quickly?

How you’re not in the mood to do a math problem you want to quickly shift your state as fast as possible to wanting to do it.

You want to go chat to a group of girls but you have no momentum, at the same time you’re fine where you are – inertia – objects in motion or at rest stay that way unless acted on by an outside force. You have to be the outside force – your bran says I’m fine right here you say no! We’re going to move!

Methods – imitation game, singing happy birthday every 5 mins pass the indifference threshold quickly. To unstifle yourself you have to do something out of character and expand out the energy and time and space you are taking up.

The number one driver of human nature is to be persistant to your identity. “I’ve found out that when I act like this I fit into the group.”

Does this game involve more like being manly or more like humiliation in the beginning?

We are all confined by our ego’s and when one person can get unstifled they can lead a crowd into being unstifled. When you’re totally unstifled and you walk up and introduce yourself she’ll just be like ‘whoah,’

Guys triained off pick up lines is like a bandade over a gaping wound – stifled trying to use a these lines would work much better if you could just get unstifled.

The club can get on top of you or you can get on top of the club. If you let it it will get on top of you.

Quickly unstifle yourself then get reference experiences then you can see your new personality.

Break--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Eye contact
Vibing – cleansing yourself out and being in the moment, being present - a non linear conversation.
Logic is the opposite of emotion, Vibing is an end all of its self. If you feel like you have to prove yourself that’s not vibing.
The more you access an emotional state the more synaptic pathways that your mind creates in order to access it again and again. If you’re negative the more negative you’ll be.

Memory is state access dependant. If you’re in a negative state you remember all the other negative times – when you’re having a great night you remember all the great ones.

Logical state of mind – computer programmer – you feel alienated in a social scenario.

Logical conversation is linear.

Vibing - when you’re relaxed little fun images pop into your head.

Value in a nightclub = FUN! No qualifyinig.

You don’t need to qualify yourself
Condition yourself towards positivity
Understand what VIBING is.

Two most important bearings you have to trust – girls can like you just for you – be in the moment, don’t stretch or strive for an outcome. Belief and total internalisation that sex is natural and inevitable.

Sex isn’t a big deal it’s just a way to cement a moment or blow off steam.

The guys who have internalised that sex isn’t a big deal – part of your life – not saying “wow I hooked up with this girl” trying to fit it into your ego.

Yeah of course – girls – guys – sex – whatever.

You start to do this and other guys can’t – you start to view yourself as being superior in a way and you start to search out more reference experiences to prove you can live in this new reality.

Its good to have pick up buddies – you need to be around people with the same mindset. It’s a good and bad thing.

You have un hitched form your old identity and the easiness of social conditioning.

Newbie – hole in personality don’t know who you are anymore.

Want to get good with women but you have to be centred to be good,.

You want to live the new reality but you need constant reference experiences to be able to live it.

You get addicted to pickup – you feel better after getting in state and validation so you’re always chasing. Your mind says how do I keep pulling girls like this? I must just be the shit. A false self gets created.

The nice shores of social conditioning. Being a chode is easy. Herd mentality, limiting, so you break off and look for the island, forge a new identity. All the friends stil on the shore you wave bye bye. Some people go away for a bit, it gets too scary and they go back to the shore. Some people get lost, they don’t know who they are anymore, looking for reference experiences for years – validation becomes an addiction and can consume you. Some people find the island and fugure out who they are - get to their core self. Become centered, a deluge of reference experiences and great social calibration.

If you’re pissed off change your conditions or change your focus.

The it didn’t work concept

Two ways to be really pissed off – one is to not get what you want the other is to get what you want. Celebrities, all the fame all the women and they’re unhappy – can drive them nuts.

You get a pimp image you get love off it but is that really you ? no. So you then think you have to keep proving yourself to get love. You’re telling yourself you have no value.

Striving to be better and better, feeds the ego but starves out real self esteem. The more love and accolades you get for this character that you are the more distanced you are from that person., from accepting you can get love for the real self.

Here’s the normal me now I’m out at the club and I’m going to put on my song and dance and the girls will be into me. People who have been doing this a long time, have a lot of shells to their personality – they always feel like they have to be doing something, controlling the frame hard time just chilling out. There whole concept of why people will like them is based on them showing there super cool selves to people. The same way a chode shows off his watch, you do the same with your gregarious self. You get to the chilled restaurant and you’re like ok now I need to be doing something, you’re not doing it because you’re acting through your own intentions you’re doing it because you need to do it. When you feel the need to show that to someone you give your power away you view yourself as lower than that person.

Blueprint part 19.

More valuable – “being here and doing this or the profits?”

Society has us so scattered running around when confidence and feeling good about yourself is a default state.

Self esteem – you’re born with is its in describable like the word mojo or soul. Its self sustaining

Ego – rational construct as a substitute for self esteem.

Self esteem you have it as a kid but then get wounded – social conditioning, parents tell you to be seen and not heard anything like that. You see some guy with sunglasses or a certain drink telling you how to be. Something happens and it makes you feel bad – you feel disconnected from the tribe, your mind then says no! lets come up with logical reasons for how I can feel good.

Ego - separateness and differentness. Comparisons – Wants to kick the next man down, you can show why you’re better. Rather than saying I want to meet my potential you want to say I’m the best.


Ego tries to shelter us from the unknown – I know the environment I know the truth of my ienvironment but life is the unknown?

The more personal the wound the more universal the wound.

To get really good with women you have to eradicate all neediness.

Are we doing it because of a state of lack or are we doing it because of right action?

Are we feeling the flow of creativity or are we doing it to deny the unknown.

The now is all there is. The way you feel now, this is it. Do not seek happiness in the future. When you just feel so good ther is no need for time apart from to co ordinate things. The now is all there is – you can feel good on your own, independently. You stop reaching for an outcome.

The enjoyment of offering value can never be matched up by the result.

Concept – The result is anti climatic.

The result can never be as good as the doing. The now. It’s all the same. Happiness is all there is.

Whenever you’re operating from the ego and you’re trying to get someone to react to you you’re seeking a reaction, to self seek, that’s taking value.

When you’re just offering value that’s an attractant when you’re taking that’s a repellent.

Self amusement.

Most guys go up – she’ll like this etc trying to get her to respond.

Do self amusement instead. Say things that pump your own state.

She likes fashion. You don’t have to go up and talk about fashion. She wants to know whats interesting to you she wants to know what’s funny to you.

When you’re bringing the party she’s interested when you’re trying to wedge your way in to her party, she’s repelled.

Being authentic is so much better than trying to think and be a social chameleon.

Integrity and centeredness will always be stronger than social chameleon.

Approaching with a full cup vs an empty one. Emotional state is the full cup.

You

Presense is contagious – you’re providing the centredness that keeps her feeling good herself. That’s the value you offer as a man. If her mind is chaotic your presence is the oak tree where she is the squirrel running around. Your value as a man is very much connected to you being connected to your power as a man. Being present, knowing who you are and not self seeking in other peoples responses to you.

The more personnel wound the more universal you can’t make a personality out of it because you don’t make a personality out of having a hand.

Get rid of the ego – accept your good and your bad. Accept yourself bith for your positive side and for your flaws. When you can look past the surface of were all human beings. You get comfortable in your own skin. That’s when you can walk up to a girl

Ego based confidence – I opened this set it reacted well, I approached this set it went well. It tires you out because it is clasping and reaching. You can get in state but its not permanent.

Celebrities that lose it – have sympathy – if you have all that attention thrown at you your mind will play crazy games with you.

Create just to create – for the sake of it.

You were born happy, something happened, you lost it and created an ego but, you can find it again.

Rather than seeing someone as ‘the other’. You see yourself in all people. If they act bad they’re caught up in the ego but you don’t make an identity out of it for them or for yourself.

The self is always coming through. When you re connect with your self esteem you can be dorky and still be cool.

Anything that you feel bad about are flaws without self esteem. Dorky things about you make you awesome.

Rock star level of success they are naturally great with people in general

Getting over comparing yourself to others. Getting over finding your identity based on where you are on the totem pole.

Realise:
you can feel good, independently from other peoples reactions.
You can generate your own state
All of these things people chase in order to get themselves to feel good – ultimately its not what they really want because they’re not seeing the depth theyre only seeing the surface.