There's been a lot mentioned that you should have hobbies and a life outside pickup. Now obviously this is true, and if you needed telling it then seriously, fuck off! Come back to pickup when you're content in the other areas, confident in yourself and have things you're passionate about. But why, and how does this actually translate into me getting laid? I hear you ask. Fuck off again, because you're still not getting it.

During last nights date, she said one of the things that really stood out about me was that I have goals. Achievements in life and I was passionate about them.

Girls love guys with substance, because most of the time they don't get hit on by them. They get hit on by the boring 'lads' that are out on the piss every night, spend their weekends hungover to fuck and have dead-end jobs with no goals.

The thing is, it doesn't matter if you're stacking shelves at your local co-op, or your only hobby is fishing (LOL) - if you can talk about where you want to go in life, and what you enjoy doing, you'll come across as someone with substance.

When a girl asks you what you enjoy doing, or what you do for fun, saying you go out, get pissed with the lads and fuck about with your life basically means "I was hoping we could fuck? Cos you'd be the most interesting thing this week. Please?".

Tease her about how good your world is, dangle the carrot of your exciting, involving life in front of her. Absorb her into the things you enjoy doing and she'll be hooked.

So if you don't have your life in order, and a radiating sense of self importance then fuck off. Stop learning pick-up 'tricks' and go and spend your time doing fun stuff other than trying to get laid. When you've got so much on each week that you have to question whether it's worth dating a girl on Thursday, then you're in the right frame of mind.

Life is for living.

So what you're saying is fuck off & go fishing? Though I do like the word substance.

Why not learn this stuff along with getting a life.

It confuses me when people say "Don't learn this until all your other areas in life are handled" type stuff because being with a girl is a reasonably large part of your life.

I say; learn it along with getting your life together. And it all works together - as you learn about growing and developing habits/learning things you can implement that mindset into other areas.

Let's not lie here; this area of life is probably the second biggest thing behind your career/passions in life.

I'd agree, it's probably the 3rd biggest in my life right now. The first two are big though.

What I'm trying to say is you should aim to make your life great from the mindsets of pickup, not primarily to get better at pick up, but to live a more fulfilling life.

Getting a better life is the crucial backbone of the self improvement, all other areas in your life will improve once you've got the core sorted out.

Getting better at pickup will become a side effect of this.

So is death, but you dont spend every waking hour trying to make it happen.

I'm one of them

Methods etc are apart of it all but I meant the core foundation of PU; to go out and speak to girls, chat them up, not supplicate etc.

In fact most players I know don't have anything too great (if anything)going in their lives. Its not a life anybody would want to go for but they do get with a lot of girls.

By nothing I mean no job, real hobbies or interests, they just socialise a lot.

No but I prepare for it by doing the things I want to do in life

Also bad analogy/comparison as its not really a part of life more the end of it.

Look K, eventually a girl is going to give me her dirty laundry to smell and wear, it's just a matter of the right method and time...

Here's what nobody tells ya...

Every chick wants a guy with goals.
But no chick wants to make the sacrifces that dating a man with goals entails...

...They want the money and the glory that your passions and pursuits will/might eventually yield but don't expect any bitch to actually get in the trenches with you and help you make it happen. That's not how they roll.

I want to date girls that are really fucking dirty in bed, but I don't want them as my GF. Well, depends. But you get the idea - no sluts for LTRs.


This is a load of shit. That's why nobody tells you it. Sure, some women just want money (often crudely used to measure 'success') but most don't care about money, at all.

It's just a common misconception that girls want guys with money. They don't, they want guys that will give them a good time, in every sense of the phrase.