Interesting discussion. For me AA isn't about physical fear response anymore (which I had to take a bootcamp to get blasted away ...), instead I keep rationalising myself out of it. Basically I have a limiting belief along the lines of "a 9/10 wont be interested in me". Now consciously I realise that this is just a socially programmed response but I just cant shift it.

Anyway on the subject of desensitisation, yes it would be self defeating. I mean you only have look at people who do "exciting" jobs to realise that - racing drivers, fighter pilots, high wire acrobats etc etc. In order to be competent they have to totally desensitise themselves to the visceral thrill of what they are doing. Yes of course they all love thier jobs and are challenged by them but they wouldnt get the thrill that you an I would from doing those things. What would be the point of having dozen super model girlfriends if being with them gives you less thrill than your last modest 6/7 gf ?.

Its a difficult balancing act, I guess you want to still be aroused by hot girls but not come across as approval seeking. At the moment I'm working on suppressing my instinct to qualify myself when I talking to a hot bird.

Sapphire I think the problem is where we place the importance in having a conversation with a hot girl. I mean when talking to a hot girl im constantly thinking the only desirable outcome is that she likes me after and I get another chance to talk to her. But when I'm talking to a girl I don't really fancy I'm just my normal self and I don't really care about the outcome, I just wanna have an enjoyable conversation and this gets me a much better reception(Ironically I'm quite good getting girls I'm not attracted to attracted to me [see my graph ])

I suppose a mindset you could try is go in there thinking 'this girls personality might not be my type' then going to talk to her is just going to find out, then you can think about whether you like her or not after you have found this out.