I had a girl stay over on Saturday night.. We've been friends on facebook for over a year, and since I turned single I started chatting to her. I turned the chat flirty and sexual and then on Sat night she was bored, I was bored so I invited her over.

I picked her up, we got chatting, put a film on, had a couple shots of absinthe..

The sexual heat kept building up, Eventually she was just in her pants and tshirt, we were kissing, She was quite resistive for anything to happen.. She let my hands slip under her pants and I felt how wet she was, but after like 10 seconds she moved my hand away and said "shady". I think every time she was nervous/self conscious/embarassed, she would say "shady" as like, some form of shield.

So thats it. Things kept getting heated in the night, but I couldn't escalate further. I've never really had this problem. Although this was the first time I'd ever met her, she might have felt slutty? Cos earlier in the night she was asking me if I do this regularly (meet chicks off FB) which tbh, I don't.

Any thoughts?

maybe she just thought you only wanted her for a shag, maybe she didnt want to feel used.

Did you make your intentions clear when you invited her round?

Ive learned in these situations when i am going for a fuck with a girl and she starts LMRing me i`ll just back right off and show her that im actually not that arsed about sex

another thing i do which has turned LMR girls into fuckfests is to whip my cock out and start playing with it while they watch--that converts a lot of non believers--then put their hand on it.

I would have just tried it on with her and then backed well off, another good one is having them sleep at yours its surprising how many girls you can turn into sex in the middle of the night when your both half asleep and you and spooned behind them.

every date i would go on i would go for the kill on the 1st date and i would very often get it, but ive backed off now because its detrimental to seeing them again.

I must have missed that bit in mystery's book

That ones all mine baby!

LOL! Thanks for the words of wisdom Refl3x..

To be honest I didn't really state my intentions. BUT I have made her aware I don't want a relationship..

Perhaps I could have got some sex in the middle of the night, but I was out cold all night when we fell asleep..

I did start backing off and it did start to escalate a bit more, but I guess I didn't do it enough.

To be honest I wasn't THAT assed about sex, I enjoyed the company and it was a nice night. I just need to NOT get attached, considering I've just got out of that two and a half year relationship and my 21st birthday is next month!

Got two more dates with different girls this week, so it's all good

just be more dominant! simple

I'm impressed you've managed to get out of friend zone that can be a challenge in itself. Well done, that's even hard for the the best of us most of the time the effort required does not usually warrant the result. I would take take a different view to refl3x.

You've been very good at stating that you're not interested in a relationship, the girl will admire you're honesty and confidence, woman are so used to AFC's promissing all kinds of shit to get her pants off.

Without knowing the situation, I think the only thing you didn't do is suggest that the sex has no consequence. Women want sex just as much as men, in fact no even more so, (proved in this case by the fact she was turned on) but what they fear is the consequences of such action. Will he tell all his mates, or my friends, what if he makes me feel like a slut tommorrow, this and a 100 other questions run through her head.

I always make a point of telling a girl when I first meet her I don't kiss and tell, it implants the idea in her head straight away that if she wanted she could have sex and no one need know. Its a great thing for same night sex.

Its a relief to read that you've two more dates set up and are not focusing all your effort on this one.

Phil, yeah your post made me realise, I wasn't being dominant enough really. I should have just had her pants down and had my way with her.

Knave - I wasn't really in "friend zone" because we never really used to chat. I used to comment every now and again on her statuses but never really chatted. And yeah you're right, I didn't mention the fact I don't kiss and tell, I will try this next time. She enjoyed the night and is going to come stay over again next weekend depending on circumstances. Something funny I realised last night, She got changed in the morning in my bed, and forgot to take her panties home !!! They were under my duvet cover. I told her and she was so embarassed ha!

Since I turned single we've been chatting and yeah I made sure she knows that I've just turned single and don't want to be tied down yet. I do feel a slight voice in my head saying, don't fuck her because she will just fall in love with you. And thats annoying? Has anyone had that?

I'm trying not to get too close and to keep seeing other girls so I don't wind up hurting anybody..

Also, theres one girl I'm chatting to who wants to meet me, I told her I want to stay single, she still wants to meet, but she said outright last night that she will not have sex unless she is in a relationship? Anyone forsee a way around this obstacle?

So you must have some indication that she might be heading that way-- if so then that confirms what i origionally said

Mr Lova Lova? Shaggy!

Just stick to your guns and say ok we wont have sex then, and see her anyway, chances are she`ll fall into line


reading posts like this has made me realise - im so bored of all this shit, i just want to settle down now and make babies.
but she needs to be a hot lesbian pornstar or else i`ll get bored

Well I appreciate the comments, I'm just guna keep having fun and see what happens..

I'm still young, like I said 21 next month, definitely not ready to settle down yet.

Oh and by the way, my ex hasn't spoke to me since the breakup.. She did text me once saying she put the £80 she owed me in my bank, I replied "Thanks" and thats it. She's also made her FB profile not viewable by me. And she can't see mine.

Edit:

I've been eating a lot more healthy, and hitting the gym 3 or 4 times a week, and I'm loving it. My body is slowly becoming more muscular, the fat on my belly is slowly reducing. Next step on pay day is to get some protein powder for shakes! And by doing weights in the gym, it has made me feel a lot more confident and stronger in myself.