sorry that post was a bit rude. My view is your caring a little to much about the outcome, and stop making excuses why you didnt act when you should have. This is totally normal though i do it alot, but if you can just think "fuckit" and do what is natural.... let go dont worry what she thinks of you and follow your instinct, not your logic. Only analyse what you did good, and give yourself a pat on the bak for it, it puts a downer on your emotional state when you think "dam i should i have done that, should have done this" bla bla bla. Never doubt yourself your always on top!

AJay

Eureka, I've got it!

Gather a crowd round and get them to chant "Nok Su Kow, Nok Su Kow, Nok Su Kow" until you escalate. Bound to work, but you may have to beat up Tong Po first.

PS

approaching from behind only counts when opening. Plus you should ALWAYS walk in front or by her side unless she's showing you something and you can't walk beside her.

Lead mother fucker lead!!

another problem is you'll now have to switch frames

if you'd been in the frame of the hands-on kino and cocky-funny guy from the start, then much easier to escalate on subsequent date

but from the sounds of your date write-ups (I may be wrong) it has been the "nice guy" frame. No!

Now she may feel an disconnect by noticing a switch to a radically different frame of hands-on kino and kissing lover. No! From the start, go kino, kino, kino where possible. Even just occasional hand briefly on her shoulder to lead her to walk in opposite direction (to follow YOU) as you choose venue to go to! High-five her. Take her salsa dancing or whatever funky dance they do in China. Kino, kino, kino!

Refl3x & Nova - The cultural thing doesn't make much difference, especially in Shanghai which is very westernised. Maybe Beijing, Hangzhou is different, but being fun out here makes all the ladies want to know you because it stands out so much from the miserable males. Chinese people don't smile much, I'm definately sitting on a gold mine. After the previous responses I texted her last night, I'm seeing her saturday and after kissing I'm going to bring her back to the flat. Movie. Shag. Nice.

AJay - Nice post. (the 2nd one) Though the 1st post made a pretty good point.

Chops - Lol, funnily enough her walking in front was what made me think to hold hands. I make sure she's always beside or behind me, that I make the decision where we go, what we do, when we meet...

Rebus - I noticed I was being too nice guyish so on the last date I said people are different around different people and that she could be a bitch when we're not alone. She knew what I meant but pretended to be offended, I didn't back down and just explained what I meant then said I would never apologise for who I am. I read the reason nice guys finish last is because women are worried they're just being nice to get into the panties so I showed a small amount of the asshole side. We kino a lot, couple of massages, I did modern jive dance classes in England so i've swung her about a few times (for the alpha kino thing) the occasional neck smell. Maybe it's because I'm so new to pua that it all seems stifled. Or maybe it really is because she's Chinese and I'm Awesome, I mean English.

Once again thanks for the advice, I'll let you guys know what happens on the weekend.

One more note - I can't remember which date but I told her she had to pick me up in a taxi instead of me picking her up. She said no. I said why not? She said Why are you doing this to me? I said I was testing her, that i'd pick her up in the taxi but she had to take me to a restaurant and buy me flowers and chocolates. Then I picked her up on a motorbike that I'd bought a few days earlier. I'm spontaneous, random, fun and I enjoy messing with her head. Things are going well but I'm just pussing out over the first kiss maybe? Ugh.

OK, I was wrong with my assumption -- as you're already doing great kino. Keep it going. Great stuff.

So really, you just needed to be bolder in moving it towards kissing her then fucking her.

FYI don't subsequently veer to the opposite extreme of being a total brusque dick who also constantly negs her (but by sounds of your posts you are unlikely to make that mistake).

that's a sweet move

Concur, motorbike was obv a hella cool move. No doubt. If the next time u see her ur thinking 'how can I get her naked?' kissing will seem so much more easy than if youre thinking 'great we held hands now how do I kiss her?' Kissing is much easier than fucking. Its just an action. Kino kino kino, indicate ur going to kiss her somehow so she doesnt miss it and cause embarissment then shove her on a wall.

seriously cant believe you didnt even kiss her on the FIRST date
why do people make such a big deal out of kissing somone

Because some people don't have the experience, the bollocks, etc and in this case, he's over-analysing the whole situation and I say lack of exprience too.

who gives a fuck if you get rejected, she doesnt mean anything. but if you get certain IOIs there is no reason not to go for it.
If she is kinoing you, leaning into you-- if you walk somwhere and grab her hand and she doesnt pull away etc
Just DO IT