I'll try keep this short. I have been seeing a girl for 4-5 months and had not become official even though we practically were in a relationship. I wasnt super keen at the start but i stuck at it even with my doubts and realised she is a cool attractive and smart girl! However in this time she never made an effort to integrate with my friends and family and I haven't met her best friend once. Plus we would only catch up 1-2 times a week tops. I was getting really frustrated and was losing faith.

Over the last 2-3 weeks a girl I really really liked about 12 months ago started sending me snap chats, then started txting me and eventually we caught up for coffee. It went well but I didn't come on strong as I felt guilty as I was obviously in a semi serious relationship.

While my other relationship was slowing fading I decided to catch up with the other girl again. She was showing lots of signs (replied fast to my txts, would msg me on Friday/Saturday night asking if I'm out and to come for a dance/drink) so I went to her house during the day, brought some smoothies and had (what I thought) was a good time. It only a quick visit, didn't want to overstay my welcome.

However she has now gone cold turkey on me and my other relationship has all but ended. I'm not too worried about the girl I was dating but more about the girl I caught up with twice. I feel like now I'm ready to chase properly she has lost interest. I didn't change my txts or my get needy. Maybe she got confused and thought I was a player or couldn't read my mixed signals? Maybe she just lost interest after the second catch up?

I want to catch up again (and show me interest as I'm now single) but the txt replies are slow and I think maybe coming in strong now be a bad idea.

Also during this time I was made redundant. I'm not stressed about this and I've never had trouble find working. I'm a professional with good education and skills but maybe this could have worked against me?

Any advice on why she is cold and what to do? Cheers

The best thing to do in this situation is pursue other girls and if you still feel as much about this girl get in contact, but at least then you'll be coming from a good, positive place rather than a needy, fear based place as you'll have other options which will help with your self confidence. Good luck.

Thanks bobbyrant for the advice.
Since my post I asked her if she was free on Friday to which we she replied she is going away for the weekend with her girl friends not asking me any questions. I simply replied 'sounds awesome, have fun and party hard'.

I'll take your advice and not talk to her for a while and start meeting other girls. I don't think I'll forget about her though, for some reason I really like this girl.

Yeah, everyone goes through the "this girl is so special stage" what does that tell you?

I think Tyler from RSD has a great video somewhere where he says "I really like this one" translates to "I'm never going to have sex with her", not because you can't, but because your bias is getting in the way of your game and you can't act the same way around her as you can with girls who you're indifferent to. That's why the best advice is chase others for the time being.