I have a friend who is really funny and a great person, however they completely lack confidence in themselves and have this limiting belief hanging over them that they are never good enough.

From an unbiased perspective, they aren't bad looking, well-dressed and when not worried, generally a good social person.

The question I have is how do I get them to realize this and get them to be all they can be?

The question is, does this person wish to change, and are they then willing to take the necessary steps to change themselves?

I have a couple of friends who I've offered to 'help' or 'show them the way'. Unfortunately they either mock or reject it, one even actually admitting he was too narrow minded to change his ways.

Well they want to be better and more confident, but I guess you can never tell until it comes to the crunch...

It's often a very slow path. It's really slow, because you can't just tell them straight and let them bite. I think you'll have to somehow bring them to the realisation that although they like to think they don't have a problem and they're 'OK' with girls, they're actually a social brick in the pond of opposite-sex social interaction. Sorta like breaking them down before you build them back up - just make sure you do a good job of building them back up.

I have a friend like that (who am I kidding, we've all got shit loads of these) and up until a few weeks ago was terrible. He actually has a sort of alter ego to protect himself from talking to girls on a serious level. To pass off like he doesn't care. Not exactly Pierce Brosnan with the ladies.

What I found works well, is to get them to the point they literally don't give a shit about talking to girls. They almost have the sole intention of getting rejected. Tell your friend that it doesn't matter, and the only person that will care or even remember if they get blown out is themselves.

Then, get them as your wing. Once they get rid of any AA they can get familiar with talking to girls. Then the confidence will come later.

I think this is working for my friend, he certainly seems a little more outgoing with at least talking to girls. Only time will tell I guess.

A friend once summed it up. You get guys that are good with girls, and guys that aren't. Although this goes against PU beliefs, for 95% of guys it's true. If you're shit with girls you'll probably marry the one you loose it to. Unless of course, you actively do something about it.

Confidence to most guys is synonymous with roughly eight pints.

Cheers for the answers. I was thinking of confidence as a general quality as opposed to particularly seducing womens, though to me they are now synonymous...

Confidence as a general quality can't be achieved in a specific non-generalised way. Shit get's pretty complicated. A general rule of thumb for confidence in whatever you're doing is even if you don't feel confident MTFU and act like a confident person would. As time goes along with you doing this you'll get reference experiences for doing that and the confident behaviour will start to feel more natural.

Confidence is just being your self in an unfamiliar situation.

Its not a feeling but a lack of one. It's you but one that isnt caught up the situation.

It's saying without censor all the things on you mind. Its accepting adrenaline and what ever your feeling yet still expressing yourself. Courage comes from the root heart, to express your heart no matter the moment is true courage.

We see other peoples confidence and think it would be easy if we had that. We dont realise they have the same feelings of doubt and butterfiles as the rest of us. They just took action inspite of it.

Confidence is just accepting the situation and how you feel and doing shit anyway.

We all have our own ideas about what confidence is from our own experiences and where we are now.

For me it was realising that when I make a mistake or fail, it doesn't matter. It's totally insignificant. I realised that in the course of trying to improve myself, it's inevitable that I will fail or be rejected and I have get used to it. So, I did.

Don't be scared of small failures as they are gone so quickly that immediately after failing it is of no significance whatsoever.

There will be areas where other people's ideas about what confidence means to them will overlap, so maybe finding some small area where you and your mate both agree where confidence comes from and then take it from there and help him to reinforce this.

success in a specific area = Confidence.