Yeah, these are kinda my thoughts too Blanca. That's why I held off.

I disagree with you about shagging girls with boyfriends but I do understand where you're coming from. The majority of my more attractive girl mates all have boyfriends and don't stay single very long. One actually has an absolute cunt of a boyfriend who's relationship has been on and off for the last year or so. There have been times where I've briefly thought 'fuck it, she's fair game'

It's true that desirable women don't have a very long shelf life, but that's why we study PU, so that we can get in there before the next man!

way I see it is. if not me then some other guy. She made the promise not. me she's at fault. boyfriend that's life. mates sister not worth the friendship loss.

I went to college with this guy and then ended up dating his sister for near on 3 years. If he's grown up about it he'll appreciate someone he can trust making his sister happy.

I have a sister; I'd be fine with one of my friends dating her, as they are all great guys. She always goes out with musicians, artists and DJs (wild creative types). I'd rather her go out with someone interesting not boring, as I think it's better life experience for her.

She's an adult, so I respect her to make her own decisions. She seems to have the upper hand in most of her relationships anyway so I would just say, "Okay, dude if you think you can handle it."

Morals sometimes appear to hold you back but are extremely attractive to the right women. Generally speaking the most of the things they hold you back from are well worth being held back from but not always. Your mate's siste I reckon was fine; if he had a problem then that's his problem not yours. The lone girls is the middle ground because she was clearly alone and confused. I don't think there's a right or wrong answer except trying your luck probably wouldn't have done much harm whichever way it went. The Goth girl is the easy one.

Loosten up a bit but not too much.

Fair comment K. I was using the most convenient example to demonstrate my point.

My view on going for girls with boyfs stems from my experiences at uni, where almost every single fit girl I knew had a long-term chode boyf, leaving me frustrated. I've written in depth on the subject of the mentality of these people and how it affected me, and it undoubtedly changed my view of girls (because they are most definitely girls, not women) of my age (I'm 22 for anyone who is unaware).

To an extent I wish I didn't have this mindset. It's mostly laziness on my part - it is easier to just go "oh I can't be fucking arsed, let's just pull whoever and if she's taken tough shit" than to sit tight and chat up the ones who are actually single. It became almost laughably predictable that, when I enquired about a fit friend of one of my friends, that she "had a boyfriend", and 3 years of this rather warped my mindset. It seems easier to not give a shit about whether she's taken or not.

It's something I'd like to change, but we'll see.

But you are from Nottingham! Are there not 2 women to every man there? That's what they keep telling me.

My tuppence worth on an interesting thread:

The lone girl - The dynamic of your approach from the off was not 'pick her up', but rather 'save her from that potential rapist'. Therefore there was an inevitable conflict when you then decided you'd like to kiss her yourself, as you felt this would have made your intentions appear insincere. In the event, I don't think she would have felt this and you probably played it too safe.

The girl with the boyfriend - this is a complex area, but ultimately I take the approach that, as long as I don't know the guy involved, I will offer myself to girls regardless of whether they have fellers or not. It is then up to the girl to decide whether or not she takes the offer up. I see no problem with this. On this occasion, if the boyfriend is around, perhaps bear in mind you might ket a kicking for it. If he isn't - well, let it ride.

The mate's sister - there is no one-size-fits-all solution to this, and it all hangs on how close you are to the mate in question. If you firmly value that friendship, then you'd be well advised to not try and pork his sister. If you wanted something a little more long term then there's no problem with that, but I can appreciate that having one-off fun with a friend's sister probably isn't the best idea. I value friends more than I value girls, and wouldn't like any girl to come between me and any of my friends. That said, I also don't have a sister of my own, and so can't really comment on the emotions involved. On this occasion, I think you did the right thing.


These are complicated areas though, and different variables in each will produce different results.

I hadn't thought about it like that. You're spot on CO!