Ssshh - Don't use my name, it's a secret you'll blow my cover!!

New people and new experiences
 

Just been reflecting on my experiences since doing all this day game malarkey. In particular I think of some of the cool girls I've met the past few months, some of which I have become good friends with also. I have girls in China and South Korea who are going to show me round their cities when I finally get my arse over there. I also went on a trip to Taiwan as a result of meeting my last girlfriend doing day game, one of the best trips I've ever been on.

Some of the cool people I've met, and experiences I've had, would not have come about if I hadn't got myself out there meeting new people in the streets. I'd recommend it to anyone.

Is this you about to break the news telling us you've accepted a job with daygame.com lol

Man this is awesome, its just amazing what you can/you have achieved through Day Game!

I've got to the stage where I'm just talking to people better but not actually hot woman, seems like I back out of approaching them and if they open me I don't really let the self come through, as preached by Tyler. I think the best way to describe it is I switch to chode auto-pilot. I'm still battling through AA even after the interview realisation.

See guys! creeping out girls in supermarkets does pay!

I had a two week break and resisted approaching any girls, and cleared my head of all the noise. Upon stepping out the door to game once more, I had no expectations and no agenda, except... to meet and talk to girls and people in general. I had no intention to get a number or 'try' for a date. I had realised how outcome dependent I had been, well, all my life.

As a result, I had some fucking awesome interactions last weekend, and now some dates for the weekend (which is nice). I need to just allow things to happen, rather than pushing 'the close' all the damn time.

freedom from outcome & ego
 

This realisation that I was being far too dependent on results has ended up being a huge turning point in my game. Everything feels more real now. Having written down thoughts relating to this I have seen how much this affected what I was doing, and who I am. A couple of examples:

Kino. I was touching girls in order to attain a result. Logically this might make sense, you escalate towards the goal of a lay. However I was doing it more out of fear of being friend-zoned. Now, I am conscious that I will do it because it feels good to do so. Self amusement if you will.

Getting the lay. I was pushing and pushing to get logistics just right before, girls could feel this and resisted. Now, I have stopped forcing things, all a sudden I got laid twice over the wkd. The key, I thought to myself, 'if I get laid cool, if not it'll happen sooner or later. This is a tricky mindset if you are desperate to get laid in the first place though.

There are other areas that are affected, and a lot of it is related to ego and fear of rejection. Now I am beginning to identify with this, I can start to really act through my own intentions and not allow the ego to fuck me up.

Trying to kiss girls 3-4 times when you have literally only met was a bit forward haha. Especially since I remember you saying to me something similar that putting my arm around a girl's neck when we've just met was forward. But this is something you've already reviewed about your interactions anyways, I'm just saying.

I've neglected my daygame, gunna go out tomorrow in fucking beast mode.

It's all about calibrating to each scenario. I was attempting to kiss them for the sake of it and rushing things. Now I am more patient and allow things to happen, as opposed to forcing it. It's never really too soon to do anything, it all depends.

Hit the streets for the Sat Sarge, nice sunny sat afternoon. Was a pretty rough day with none of girls really stopping to chat to me. I ended up at Picc train station, and saw a cute well dressed girl in the concourse. I went over and started chatting out how cool I thought her style was. I took her hand and we carried on chatting. After a while I took her other hand and the sexual tension started to build. After 5-10 mins of fun chat she needed to get her train, so I grabbed her number telling her to come back to Manchester (as she lives in Leeds). I hugged her and then stood there with her my arms looking into each others eyes, we then made out. She then needed to dash for the train so hand in hand I dashed her to the train. She just made it. It was all like a film.

kino on a quick date
 

Today on my lunch break I met up with one of my girls for lunch for a second date. Grabbed a sandwich then sat in her uni canteen. As we chatted away I ended up stroking her hand, her leg and her hair, at different stages of the interaction. We departed after a fairly unatmospheric but enjoyable lunch.

Then, an hour later she texts me to tell me how much she enjoyed me stroking her hair. This is a first, and a very interesting bit of feedback for me. If any of you have read the struggle I have had on dates in the past on this thread, with me creeping girls out with my ill judged kino moves, you will understand the significance of this.

Today, the difference between then and now is clear. I touch her because I want to and am inspired to, not because i feel I need to (in order to get something).

Yep. You're getting smoother.

Actually, I see the act of being smooth as detrimental to me expressing my true self, as I would be trying too hard to gain approval. The very fact I was touching her, spontaneously, for my own enjoyment meant she enjoyed it. You're right though, I'm a right smoothie now :hihi:

Day Game: Instant date/make-out/near lay
 

So, I’m hanging out with Riz in town. I was hungover, looked a right state, and already had 3 girls tell me I scared them while talking to them. The only way I was gonna feel any better was to crack on talking to more girls… what better cure is there for feeling rough?

So, after a few decent interactions, I see this girl dressed in a crazy Japanese style walk out of Selfridges. I walk over and introduce myself, and she is instantly in a trance as I hold her eye contact. She is from Hong Kong tells me she has just arrived in Manchester that morning to visit her boyfriend. There is something about the way she looked at me that kept me there and we continue to flirt. I take her hand, then after a while the other one. After a while we embrace and hold her in my arms. I think about making out with her, but don't. I tell her we should go grab a coffee. She accepts my invite and we walk hand in hand into the quiet shopping mall.

While on the escalator I put my arm around her, lean in, and we start making out. We grab a brew and settle down on the sofa. She tells me her boyfriend is on the train so on the way to meet her. We chat and make out a few more times… her lips were amazing. We were both starting to get pretty turned on and I started thinking about how I could fuck her. If we were all alone at that moment we would have fucked. I tell her we should go somewhere cool. She then tells me her boyfriend has arrived at the train station so has to go. I walk her to the door and we exchange numbers. I tell her to let me know when she’s free.

I haven't heard from her since, fair enough. It was a little adventure and she'll prob want to leave it at that. I should have just fucked her in the mall toilets in all honesty. Either way, was a pretty funny experience. Girls with boyfriends never fail to amaze me.

Nova, do you do the yad/tom/andy stop where you run around the front of a moving girl to face her head on effectively carrying out the "attention snap" from the daygame blueprint?

No, I stop them how I wish to stop them, so it's always quite spontaneous in nature. I don't follow any format. So, I see a girl I like and I go over to talk to them. For me, it's all about expressing myself 100% and being completely present. When they look into my eyes they will see I want to fuck them then and there.

The last month or so I’ve chilled into a sweet spot of regular sex with a rotation of 3 or 4 girls. As a result I’ve become pretty lazy with meeting new girls. This is obviously no bad thing, it’s been nice to have a break from the relentlessness of meeting new girls and dating.

So, yesterday I was chilling at home and suddenly felt pretty horny, but didn’t want to over-do it with the girls I’d been seeing, so headed out into the summer sun to see if I could meet someone new. I was pretty ropey and after a few ok interactions I had a decent interaction with a Korean girl. We go for a beer, check out some architecture, then I take her back to my neighbourhood. It suddenly became a little uncomfortable as I think I was trying to push things forward when it blatantly wasn’t going to happen. I also hesitated quite a bit in moving things forward. Reflecting, I had fallen back into old habbits somewhat, especially with the hesitancy, i.e. overthinking if I should make out, if I should hold her hand, if I should touch her hair, etc.

So, this wkd I realised it wasn’t as straight forward as just suddenly changing. It’s going to take consistent practice, reference experiences and persistently pushing my comfort zone to move things forward. There's value in going out a lot and staying on the ball.

EDIT: Thinking back, the big downfall of the date with the girl yesterday, was being more focused on the outcome, than enjoying the moment with her in the bar. I have noticed the difference in this over the past few months, and it is pretty massive. Being present is killer.

Two different conversations
 

After work last night I ended up nipping to the shopping mall to pick up my contact lenses. As usual there are girls knocking about. Something that struck me looking back at the two interactions I had was what made them so different.

Girl 1: I found out she studies law. From here the conversation went nowhere in particular and she left.

Girl 2: I found out she studies some strange course that to do with social attitudes. This got me particularly intrigued and the conversation got quite deep with me sharing my own experiences and finding out more about her. She prolonged the interaction as much as she could.

On the surface level, the difference is quite obvious in that one girl I found more interesting from what she studies. This has got me thinking that I could make more effort with girl 1 though. Looking back with girls who might study boring courses I have been just finding out, and then going 'Oh so what do you want to be after you graduate?' This is quite a nothing question and on my part I am making no genuine effort to get to know them or connect on a deeper level than the surface level pleasantries. So, I need to think more about what I want to know about them, and how to get that information. Then, if I like it, the excitement begins.

Back on it... once more
 

Today I felt like I had woken up again after drifting along in my content bubble of getting laid. Upon the lunch hour arriving I got straight out in the sun to talk to some girls. I felt awesome and wanted to share this with them!

Girl 1: Girl struts across the road wearing hotpants. I told her she looked sexy. She was a bit shy though, talked for a minute and then escaped getting on the bus.

Girl 2: I told her how sexy she looked all smiles. She went 'Oh my god', then took her sunglasses off before telling me she was married. I liked her reaction, sheer shock and that feeling of me sweeping her off her feet.

Girl 3: I saw this girl coming a mile off and we walked right at each other. I turned around in pursuit. I stop her and tell her how amazing she looked when I saw her walking towards me. This one was trying to escape, I told her to stay a minute as I wanted to get to know her. She obliged. She then looked rushed. I tell her I'll walk with her, she seemed comfortable enough and we did. I uncovered her passion for architecture and we vibed well. Then we reached the gate of her halls firt some more, and I go for her number...

Girl: maybe we'd just see each other about again
Me: no we won't. I'll get your number now
Girl: What If I don't give it you, will you kidnap me?
Me: Yes, I'll hold you captive

Girl gives me her phone. Later this girl is flirting away with me by text and assisting me in arranging our first date. This really showed me the value in a little persistence. She kept trying to walk off, but I kept squaring up to her and getting in her space. Eventually my reality dictated. I particularly like the little fantasy suggestion she had of being kidnapped.

date
 

Something I left out of yesterday’s report was another girl I met / Girl 4. This approach went well, and she responded well to me invading her personal space and kinoing her etc. We arranged to meet up at 6pm that evening.

We met, and I hugged her. I grabbed her hand to lead her to the bar. She found this too much, so whatever. We grabbed a drink, and she is very relaxed with me touching her. I end up playing with her hair. Then, after a while I decide to ask her if she has had boyfriends before. Then, she reveals she HAS a boyfriend back in her hometown.

This pissed me off. As much as this is potentially a good thing, i.e. you can be her ‘no strings bit on the side’, I just got annoyed and started grilling her, particularly as she started saying how nothing could happen and she was strict. The bit thing that really made me mad was she pretended it was innocent, despite me telling her how sexy she looked as soon as I met her.

At the end of the day I got all logical on her, when I could have let it slide and maybe something could of just happened. Maybe that’s what she wanted, but I really I am getting pissed off at the amount of girls I’m meeting who have boyfriends, and only let slip after a couple of drinks or 2 hours later.

I am not in the mood for wasting time on girls who are not up for it, I need to get better at screening this nonsense out early, that is if she wasn’t up for it. Either way, she's out the picture for good.

How well does it go down asking outright pretty early into the conversation? Seems like it would be something you would want to know about sooner than after you've wasted 2 hours

The boyfriend isn’t all that important to me really, I guess the reason I got so wound up was because that's the second girl in a row I’d been on a date with, and she didn't let it slip til the last minute either... they just lap up the attention.

For me it is a simple question. Is she willing to fuck or not? I think I need to communication this more clearly to the girl, rather than tip-toeing into it and then getting stung. If she’s not down with the program she can then make that clear, early.

I think a lot of girls like playing the game to make themselves feel wanted, I guess its a bit of a compliment or rush for them, but still being able to withhold dignity by declining at the last minute. Cock teasers.

My first thinking on reading the last few post is that if she's willing to dish her number out and have flirty text with you the boyfriend is irrelevant. I think she would have put out depending on how much time you invested in her! The question is... Is she worth the time it would take to get into her pants? If she can give her number out and flirt and go on a date with you she obviously doesn't care about her boyfriend to much! She's just testing you to see what you intentions really are. I don't think there is any easy way around this other than cut the tie if she's not worth the hassle. I know you are wasting you time by going on the date with her but you will learn something everytime this happens.

I agree. There does seem to be a pattern here. I need to nip this in the bud early enough with any given situation. I am expecting to escalate things to sex quickly within a couple of dates, or less... or else.

It ended with me telling her she could leave, with no pleasantries. Looking back I should have made it worse for her. It was obvious to me whilst sitting there hearing all her nonsense that she was taking full advantage of my feeding her attention, hence I got pissed off.

Perhaps I do need to spell it out more literally, that I am in no mood for wasting time being some sort of temporary 'provider'.

A Touching Story
 

So last night I banged my second Korean chick. This is all thanks to a dude I know who rocks the streets in London doing day game, and who laid the foundations for me hooking up with this girl. Last Saturday he rang me up on the said girls phone, and told me he’d just approached her, and that she was visiting Manchester the following wkd, and if I would like to show her round. Naturally I said yes and fired over a few texts to build up the excitement.

Saturday evening I tell her I’m free to meet up and we go straight to my favourite bar so she can taste genuine English ale. We sit down and I’m there playing with hair and building the sexual tension. She tells me she has to leave for the airport at 4am, so I had to work fast. After 15 mins I make out with her, and chat some more. I bounce her to the second bar and we grab a cosy corner and sample some more ales. After some more kissing I tell her we should grab some food back near my house, ‘as it has the best food in my area’. We grab the tram back to mine and get straight into my bedroom. I stick on some music and get her to take shoes off. The idea of food is a distant memory as we knew why we were both there, and I bang her. She was fun, and Sid is a gent.

I'd been considering going longterm with one of my girls, but this has reminded me what I'd be missing. The excitement, the adventure, the fact that this girl is totally different to the others. There's so many girls out there to meet. Be good to meet some more.

Bars I educated this girl in:

Bar 1: Common
Bar 2: Port Street

Preference in no particular order, but both with an awesome range of ales and cosy booth seating for the ladies. In Port Street I have also found the perfect descret spot for getting your hands down a girl's pants fast :)

After a mini break...
 

And so after a 4 month-ish exclusive relationship with a girl I am back on it once more, and very excited.

Yesterday I thus hit the streets once again. Did a couple of approaches and the second girl really got me into the swing of things again. She was very cold, and wouldn't give anything away upon me asking questions. I managed to plough through this and the interaction lasted a couple of minutes before she asked me if she could leave. I said 'yes', why?

Had a few other ok stops, got a couple of numbers, and then started to really amp up the sexual presence. One girl in Selfridges I really got nice and close to and we flirted like mad. Another girl in Aldi was similar, and I was holding her hand for 5 minutes while she giggled all shy. When telling me what she did for fun she revealed she hung out with her boyfriend. I then mentioned he wouldn't like he holding her hand. This then forced her to rationalise it all and the whole adventure was over as she pulled her hand away and we said farewell.

Today I had to go to the office to do some work, on the way there I clock and approach a nice German girl. Funny one this. She's happy with me getting right up in her face and is qualifying the hell out of herself, but her eye contact is all over the show. Perhaps she's shy in this respect, but warm to the physical stuff. Anyway, she told me to text her... I will.

What was her response?

Were you out for the whole purpose of running daygame, or other than having to work were you just going about your business doing other stuff as well?

She walked off, as I had given her permission to. Next time I come across this situation I will say no.

It kind of relates to today with the German girl, as I told her/stated that we would go for coffee. She then asked, 'are you asking me or telling me?' I told her the later, then proceeded to get her number.

Saturday I was out for strictly day game, and ended up doing 6 hours solid. Learnt a lot. Today was just a girl passing on the way to work. She had a cheeky look on her face, so I had to approach.

Nova's back!

Wed after hours

I finished work and left the office around 8pm, was a chaotic day, but felt good. I had got back on the exercise, cleaner diet, no beer and started meditation over the past few days, so probably beginning to see some of the benefits.

I left work in a decent enough mood, and on the way home I see a couple of girls. I was feeling a bit lazy and made excuses not to approach. Then, I saw a Vietnamese girl with long boots looking all glam. More recently I've been wanting to tone down my direct approach, so told her she looked nice and left some intrigue.

Anyway, the thing I enjoyed about the interaction was I allowed myself to flow more. I was feeling more in the moment, and talked about random stuff I wanted to talk about, as opposed to thinking so much. This is what I've been missing, and I am now hoping to 'do' less, and 'be' more.

Thurs after hours

Again after a looong day at work I leave around 8pm and walk through town. I see a few girls and yet again catch myself making dumbass excuses. Do I not want some pussy?? Any one of these girls could be a nice fuck buddy for the Winter months.

I then see a nice looking Korean chick and go after her. She's only been in Manchester a week and is studying English. I speak carefully at first , but her English is good and we get into a nice conversation about football and music. Something I was better at today was eye contact. The vibe was really good, I could feel attraction on her part when compared to all the sets I've had in the past couple of weeks. I could sense she was swept off her feet by the whole experience. Nice.

I was buzzing from this, and it has reminded why I love talking to girls so much. However I am not approaching enough girls. The other thing, I am relying on my good experiences like today to plod along. I need to take more rough with the smooth and hammer some tougher girls who are gonna throw some shit tests at me so I can learn more. That means hotter more confident girls.

What happened in the end?

Why do you think you've started making excuses? That doesn't sound like you? A bit rusty after being away from it for a few months?

We exchanged numbers, it was a no brainer. I text her a couple of hours later and told her it was cool to meet her. Her response was ‘Me too, I was astonished!’. She sounds excited :P


While I might be rusty, I will make up excuses not to approach. Most of it is me protecting myself from negative emotions, or worse still protecting my self-image, so I will say things like ‘Oh I’m tired/I’ll do it at the wkd/she’s probably in a rush… etc. All bullshit. The main excuse is a much bigger picture and comes from me not even considering the hotter girls as I will not feel entitled to them and assume they will not be interested in me. With an attitude like that, they won't.

If it doesn’t sound like me, I guess it’s because now I am trying to face up to my fears more. Time get honest with myself.

Really? I read this whole thread start to finish and you've been doing this for yonks now with plenty of success - you still get those thoughts? I guess its always still in the background and never goes away.

I had a good run of success through the Summer months, but this was just the beginning of what I was capable of, so stopping when I did, I lost the momentum.

Only 4/5 years ago I barely believed I could get a girlfriend, and was always the 'nice guy' in the friend's zone. Changing this is gonna take more than a few months. This is a longer journey, but from what I've experienced so far, it's gonna be worth it!

Chilling in town

One of my old flames from the summer was back in the country for a few days so finished banging her this morning then headed to the art supply shop. I felt so ridiculously chilled breezing through the crowds and had a couple of girls check me out, but I couldn't be bothered approaching. This troubled me a little as today I intended to do more approaching.

Anyway, i get in the art shop and there's this mega cute Korean girl checking stuff out. This was a must. I went over and told her she looked pretty (she was gorgeous). Great eye contact and vibing. She'd just moved to Manchester from Germany to work as an engineer and likes her art, interesting girl. She mentioned a boyfriend when telling me about Christmas shopping, but it was passing comment within her list of friends and family. I had to stop myself asking about this, it's irrelevant.

I then thought I'd test to see how interested she was and we fell silent for a few seconds/vacumed while holding eye contact. She didn't make any excuses to leave and we continued vibing. We exchanged numbers, and she told me I should add her on Facebook.

This week I've maintained a healthy diet of fish and greens, no beer (except 2 last night), went jogging on Tues & Thurs, and managed 4 stints of meditation. I feel this is all helping somewhat with mood, sharpness of mind, etc. It will have to be more longterm to have a genuine effect though.

I arranged to hook up with this chick this afternoon so I naturally took her to Northern Quarter for an introduction into English ale. The vibe was chilled and she was receptive to me touching her hand, which later turned into me holding her hand between venues. Turns out this girl is a creative and loves photography, think we're gonna get along well. Her English was pretty poor though so coudln't express myself as freely as I would have liked, but it was a nice laid back affair.

We end up at the Christmas Markets and had some more beer and food, then I took her to the bus stop. She was a bit shy, plus I was rusty, so was tough creating a decent kissing moment but she was happy with all my other physical advances. No rush, next time.

Reflecting more on this date, I now need to admit to myself that I was playing it too safe for fear of scaring off the girl. Fool. This is totally the wrong attitude. I should have tested the water at least 2/3 times and tried to make out with this girl, as we were hanging out a good 4 hours. One moment in particular I had here isolated and was showing her the delights of the architecture in the Barton Arcade, I could have easily pulled her in and tried here.

There was sufficient comfort built up to have tried this, especially thinking back to the fact we were feeding each other food in the market. Doh!