Well well, my first taste of Bristol sarging, and quite an experience it turned out to be. I'll start from the beginning.

I woke up yesterday morning with what can only be described as the worst temperature anyone has ever had. Ever. Needless to say, with a 4 hour train journey (and a lot of bag carrying) ahead of me, paracetamol were needed, and duly taken.

Anyway, fast forward to 7pm, when I met Stu (Hustler) for the first time. We sat for a while in Greenhouse, where my "no drinking due to all the paracetamol in my system" policy lasted all of about 20 minutes. We sat and had a good long talk about game, about each other and how exciting this coming year is going to be. We eventually moved on to the Pitcher and Piano where we met Sean (Summer Junky). Alas, he was working so couldn't get involved, but we all had a chat and he sorted us out with some cheap drinks (cheers dude ).

Upon leaving P+P, we had our first open of the night. About 5 girls who were completely fucking mental challenged us to a roly poly competition. In the middle of a busy street. Yes, really. Anyway, we teased them a bit for how they were dressed (fancy dress) and teased them a bit more about their frankly sub-standard roly-polys. Stu had good rapport with one of the girls (quite fit she was too), and I bagged a shorted, black haired HB7. Unfortunately, the gobby Mother Hen of the group came and took her friends away so we moved on.

Next stop was Agora, which was empty but for a few guys and a 3 set of stunning babes. Seriously, all 9s at least. They were sat behind us dancing a bit and taking photos, and feeling brave, I said to Stu "right, I'm going for a wee. On the way back, I'm opening." I didn't. In my mind I figured they were too spread out, plus one had fucked off outside and I didn't feel up to a two set. I know they can be tricky.

Without further ado we hit the Scream bar, whereupon I had a low point. I suffered really bad AA over a 4 set (3 girls), none of whom were above a 7. Stu helped me out though, and recommeded I ask a perfectly innocent question to get my confidence up. I did, and it felt good.

The next port of call was easily the best. Illusions. The magic bar. Boosted by the Scream bar, I opened as soon as we stepped into a very packed Illusions:

Me - "Guys, I need your opinion on this. I can't stay long, I need to get back to my friend, but what do you think of tattoos?"
Entire 3 set - "Ohhh no I don't like them they're not cool"
Me - "Well my sister wants to get her boyfriends name tattooed on her arm, you think she should do it?" (There is no sister).

This carried on for a bit but went nowhere.

After that, Stu got the drinks in and I opened a 2 set at the bar with "Guys did you know Elvis used to dye his hair black?" Worst opener ever. It worked though. These 2 girls completely bought it and there was some cool interaction for a bit. Again though, it didn't really go anywhere.
The best of the night so far came next. Near the magician's booth thing, I found a discarded cocktail, and opened a girl (who in hindsight was quite fit) by asking her to smell it and try to work out what it was. This led to very good interaction, we talked for a good 20 minutes or so, bits of kino, my gut told me she was interested but it gave me good social proof around the area. It ended with me sharking someone out of a seat so I could see the magician and talking to a black haired HB8 next to me. In hindsight, she might've been a bit grime. Fit, but ever so slightly rough if you know what I mean. Anyway, there was big interest there for 10 minutes or so, lots of kino and IOIs, but unfortunately, due to lots of pints and some cocktails I found, I was quite drunk by this point, and decided I wanted to watch the man do magic more than I wanted to pull this girl. I lost it. Shame.

The final chapter in mine and Stu's marathon night out concluded with a trip to Tube, an underground dubstep/D+B/electro club, on the one night it played electro (my least favourite out of the 3, but still good). Opened a couple of girls with the "Are you a shark or a sheep?" opener, but by this point I was so hammered I had disregarded almost every piece of advice I had gleaned from Mystery. I opened targets, displayed far too much interest, and then spilt red wine all down my white shirt. Fail.

However, the shark or sheep opener proved a success. One girl in particular (I can't even remember how hot she was) was intrigued by it all and there was good interaction until a massive black guy literally dragged her away. Other than that, I opened the fit (8-9) barmaid on the dancefloor with something about D+B, and how she was doing the dance wrong.

And then it happened. The Apocalypse came. I saw her coming and I knew...it was time. She was about an 8.5, in a patterned red dress thing, blonde, very my sort of thing, on the outskirts of a bit of a group. The apocalypse came out, and I held the line...and held it...

Then her friend came over. Bollocks, that's my game ruined. Not so (the girl actually said "erm maybe yeah" before her friend interjected), she actually turned to her friend and said "do you think I should go home with this guy?"

Unfortunately, they took too long discussing it and I thought I'd lost the set, so rolled off and went back to dancing like a prick. After that we went home chicken burger and doner wrap in hand.

So there we have it, a fantastic night out. Morals of the story:

1) Amount of alcohol consumed is inversely proportional to my gaming competence.

2) Pick up is a lot harder than it looks or sounds (I opened a LOT of sets in Illusions, some were unreceptive, some were just downright rude). The fact is neither me or Stu got so much as a number all night.

3) The fact the we had little success on the night is unimportant. The fact is, me and Stu had a wicked night, really got to know each other and I certainly gained a massive amount in confidence, so much so that I'm seriously considering doing a solo night sarge this week.

4) The shark or sheep opener is a good one, for anyone that likes the canned stuff.

5) Don't go out with 40 quid in your wallet. I should've known better. If it's there and you're drunk, you'll spend it.

6) Having a wing in field is going to be a huge advantage. Not only that, but in times of need (like in the Scream bar) they can get you back in the saddle and offer advice.

NB Shark or sheep explanation: My friend is a student of business studies, and pulled this quote out from somewhere

"Sharks are winners because they don't look back. They can't look back because they haven't got a neck. Necks are for sheep"

Essentially, sharks are winners. They act with disregard to what people think of them, and with utter confidence in their ability to be right. If people don't like it, fuck them. There's a slight arrogance and almost nastiness to being a shark, but mostly it's just about winning and not giving a fuck.

So that was our first proper night in Bristol. Now me, Stu and Sean need to round up some more lads and get a proper hub going!

Dude, Awesome report.

Can't believe I missed out, I was ll set for coming out but something came up at the last minute.
Then I left my phone on charge at home and didnt get back until 6 this morning

Looks like a good night, hopefully just the start of the Bristol outings.

Next time.

There's more to come Willy, next time we go out get on board!

Any more details on the apocalypse, mate? What did you actually say?

I'll find the post where someone put up a link. The guy who described the Apocalypse explains it really well, I don't feel I could do it justice! Essentially I did it exactly as directed.

Ahh, here's the badger:

PUA Openers, PUA Routines, Articles - Shock and Awe part 2: The Apocalypse Opener - PUA Reviews and Ratings

Enjoy!

Deffo! Nice one for getting the ball rolling, you won't regret it as Stu can tell you it's awesome when you get a lot going out. Hopefully others will join you now and you can get something going like we have here up in Manchester.

Why didn't you use Stu? I'm sure if you would have talked to them he'd have come over and taken one of the girls to one side or was he away wooing the ladyfolk?

This is a good mentality to have if you don't have fun and are completely goal orientated you're going to be robotic.

Sounds like fun times! Never been to this illusion bar, but i'm definitely gonna.
Glad to hear you got over your aa and had a decent night.

My pleasure

Ace report man, it really made me laugh at times!

I get really frustrated at times, because with some girls i really want to plunge into the depths of literacy genius i have been know to pull out. However from you're writing style you seem like you're good with words.

Any tips for how to get yourself on a role with the witt side of things?