I've just read your introductory post again. It strikes a few chords with me because I can now recognise the same thinking errors and limiting beliefs that have caused me problems (btw I'm only 2 inches taller than you are). Things are staring to change for me now. I feel as if I'm untangling that complex matrix of thoughts and feelings and moving forward.

I'm convinced what has made the biggest difference is going out more. From your FRs it's clearly made a difference to you as well. But it takes time. I go along with Tyler's advice that for the first year all you have to do is "GO OUT!"

Drawing on the pickup and self-help resource material to re-enforce your experiences in-field is also good. The wiring in your head was formed over a lot of years. It takes time to undo all that. Time, persistence and constant practice. But you'll get there. This is a fixable problem.