I've got the impression a lot of girls online are searching for longer term relationships, maybe needy and maybe having unrealistic expectations (partly due to social conditioning maybe). You want different things so like you said, fair enough if she ended it. The last girl I was with who was like that, I deliberately acted like such a dick it forced her to end it. I was coward at ending relationships. That's something for me to address.

I finished reading models recently. It did make me think a lot too. It's one of the better books I've read. I had to take a rest at various points and ask some serious questions about myself. This is a good thing, so don't shy away from it. At the same time don't over-analyse yourself.

There's a lot of underlying issues that need to be addressed if you want to build an unshakeable confidence in yourself. These should start to fall into place with experience. It's not about being perfect, it's more about changing what you can change and accepting that the aspects about yourself that you can't change don't necessarily have to present an insurmountable obstacle to acheiving your goals. In fact the trick is to turn them into advantages.

Just being comfortable with that as a part of your identity is good. The main thing is being comfortable with yourself. Liking yourself. If you have that down it makes it much easier for other people to like you.