Originally Posted by Adam Lyons

"I'm walking down the street this morning in Santa Monica heading to the American Film Market to meet with a film company I'm talking to about a show I'm pitching. When all of a sudden I notice a cute girl walking in the same direction.

She's got short black hair with dark red highlights, long legs that are covered by her patterned tights and a short mini-skirt.

And I'm wondering to myself, "should I talk to this girl?" I mean. It's not like I'm single.

Heck, I get laid a few times a day. I don't need to bother talking to this girl. It would be a lot easier to just walk by, keep listening to my Pandora station and head on to my meeting.

But I remember something.

I've got balls.

And I like them.

I approach her, not because I want to get laid, not because I want a girlfriend. I approach her because that's where my balls come from, and I don't want them to go away.

The more you practice the better you get at approaching and talking to girls. Once I started talking to her, the conversation flowed easily, we walked for about 5 minutes before we "realized" we were both going to the same place. (She "realized." I knew it for a fact, as she was too cute to just be randomly walking in the same direction as an international film market.)

The three things I wanted to make you aware of are:

1) It turns out this girl works at the exact company I had scheduled a meeting with. Coincidence or not, it wouldn't have happened if I didn't approach. My 10 minute meeting became a two hour one with the CEO as a result of the girl talking me up.

2) I approach because I want to maintain my skill of approaching, not to get a girl. In this way I'm completely outcome independent. I approach for the sake of approaching.

3) By repeatedly doing that which scares others, I maintain my confidence (testicles) and ensure I'll never be afraid to meet a girl (or potential business client) again.

Start approaching. And if you are afraid of approaching due to wondering how to keep the conversation going once you start, watch this video

Comfort Building

Adam

Originally Posted by broadswordsjw

Just 2 things I wonder about this:

1.Aren't you married?

2. Being outcome independent & approaching for the sake if approaching. Aren't these 2 awful mindsets to have? Being outcome independent forces you to act in a way you wouldn't & puts unnecessary pressure on you surely, and approaching for the sake of approaching is stupid isn't it? That's like applying for a job or going for a job interview your not really bothered about, or buying a car your not overly keen on?

Surely a better idea idea would be to approach because you think she's hot, you want to get laid or because you want to talk to her & that the only outcome you should have to start with is to strike up a conversation & see where it goes from there?

Originally Posted by Amanda Torres

Hey BroadswordWSJ, thanks for the message to Adam!

1. Yes.

2. Worrying about the outcome of something usually makes your behavior change. ie. You get nervous, anxiety kicks in, get flustered, forget what to say, makes you self conscious, etc. We find its better to not think about where you want it to go and instead just enjoy the process.

Hope this helps!
--
Thanks,

Amanda Torres