HAHAH

the book isnt about this.

Basically the story is.



He calls asking for help, claiming he needed help with this girl, he really liked her and wanted to tell her. Ill just do a dialogue

Him : Ive been dating this girl... few dates... kissed her and tha, but i dont think she is that keen. I just wanna shout from the rooftops that i like her

Me : NO!! Dont fucking do that, You dont actually want her to know, The only reason u wanna do that is so she says it back.. Why do you need to hear it?

Him: So i know she likes me

Me: But she is going on dates with u... if she didnt like you why would she

Him: Well i don want her to think i dont like her and it fizzle out.

Me: Well ur taking her on a date, im sure its clear u like her.

Him: i text her alot but her replies are not really much

ME: Ok, first of all, Stop texing her all the time... and stop putting questions on the end of texts so she will text back... which i know u are doing without u telling me...

(he sniggers)

Me: Delete her number from your phone now....if she never texts again, she wasnt interested. If she does, Cool... dont write an essay, but try and get a funny text in, make it fun. I usually create a role play, like we are married with a dog, or im a spy or superhero... somethin u can create funny banter with.

Then make sure after a few texts, when its in its fun part... end the text with ... gotta dart ill text u later. Then leave it.

Also, dont be afraid to make fun of her... u need to be willing to piss her off to make her laff.

Him: ill try it all mate.

So he does, and 2 nights later i ask him how its going, he said she is being really keen. She is going out that night what to do if she texts.

I said "just text her back somethin like "i bet u and ur mates are doing spice girls routines. They are not as cool as u think. Anyway, why are u texting a boy on ur night out u loser... go have fun xxx"

She then texts him saying "come meet me"

he rings me in a panick

I told him NO!! text her, say "that sounds boss, id like to see ya but im just really tired, but we can catch up next week one night when we are both free... have fun.

she text him saying "NO COME MEET ME"

i told him to ignore her... she text again "cant believe your jibbin me x"

the next day, they wer both due to go to a party... she calls him

"can i come with u my cousin is running late"

Now, he didnt consult me here, he should have played the knight in armour but instead he said no for one reason or another... she didnt end up at the party.. no damage, he could have banged her that night...

but alas... sunday day... she sent him a pic of her boobs.... she obvs wants smashin now.

She will be saying to her mates "he has started playin a bit harder with me... i like it"

coz people like rare objects.

funny how little it takes to get girls hot 4 u

if u can trim that down into 1 or 2 dates... u will smash it.