Hi mate, welcome to the forum, you've mentioned that you don't agree with the whole approaching for the sake of it, and whilst to a certain extent I agree but there's a whole different side to it.

Often I remember that I would use the excuse that a girl didn't do anything for me as a reason not to approach, often lying to myself so I was already conning myself out of an opportunity before even trying.

Approaching, and sparking up a conversation with somebody even if you don't want to gets you out of your comfort zone and gets you a little more au fait with speaking to somebody you don't know and over time you grow some balls so that when you see somebody that you really do have an attraction to your not too scared to go up and say hi.

And don't be ashamed or embarrassed about the situation your in, we all start somewhere! Know who you are, and who you want to be, the most important thing is that you put your all into it.