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Originally Posted by kowalski
You say that like it is the only thing written 'man up' but it isn't a lot of words were written, then it is summed up in the phrase 'man up'. This accusation goes out a lot 'You can't just tell someone to man up / be yourself' but that doesn't actually happen. Those threads don't exist. People say more but then replies like this just focus on two words out of many.
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Admittedly I have generalized and there is some great advice, but there are times (not whole threads) where somebody like yourself or Phil will weigh in with great advice or a great take on a situation, cutting to the point and then other members will join the bandwagon. but yes I have focused on those 2 words because I showed some empathy to the OP and was told to man the fuck up.
Quote:
Originally Posted by kowalski
Are we reading the same thread? That isn't what happened at all. Firstly, you were telling him to meet her, which is terrible advice and means it wasn't unanimous.
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Looking back at the thread as a whole my perception has been slightly jaded by my latter exchanges with Saphire and Chillem.
I didn't advise him to meet her, but it's clear he's going to. We might as well give him a helmet for the car crash he's going in, even it's so that he can get a little closure and move on.
I am sorry though for tarring the thread with getting on my high-horse
Quote:
Originally Posted by kowalski
The worst thing about the internet is it is a place where anyone can find other people to say 'You are right, everyone else is wrong. You aren't weird, we like the same thing as you, it is everyone else who is weird.' I hate that and so should you, so man the fuck up, be yourself and stop doing it.
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I don't think it's quite as black and white as that K, When I suffered with depression, it was easy and helpful to find people who had been in very similar situations and how they dealt with it. But there weer also points where I had to step up and do things for myself.
But I wouldn't deal with the situation the way that the OP did, but I'm sure 90% of us here have been heart-broken and irrational at some point or another and although it might be seen as too cuddly, I personally think encouragement works better than derision