Been a bit of an uppy downy very rocky week this week cuminating in tonight which ill get to,but could do with some advice answers to do with that

Friday 16th December
I spent the day worrying about my date wid Phantom i decided to ring Giant from this forum and had a really good chat wid him in fact i was a half hour late haha but it took my mind of worrying about the date so good ill ill try again.I also borrowed clerks 2 from my m8 propper funny film and following the Jay and Silent Bob theme i seem to have going at the mo.
So i get to her door eventually and she opens it,i dont say anything just grab her a kiss her,she kisses back then goes on to saying cos im so late she didnt think i was coming and hugs me etc.
We end up getting a chinese and chilling out on the couch pissing ourselves laughing watching the film.Also chat a bit at some point i drop in "im real choosy wid women,i dont sleep with every one that throws themselves at me" and that "i dont much care about getting laid,and prefer to wait till the time is right" or words to that effect. Through out the night i kiss her deeply then stop and then do it again but just a little bit more,to the point where i have my hands in her bra and shes loving it.So about half 12 shes like i think its time for bed,which by the way she says it is like lets fuck!! So with all my will as im thinking i should be taking her upstairs to fuck?? i start getting my stuff and im like i better go if your going bed,she looks a bit dumb founded.But lets me out the door and shes like your on lates arnt u?? well ill text u you come over one night after work.
So im like its only half 12 ill head to town,towns dead.So im like ill drop in on backup,shes still up watching a dvd in bed so i join her,its a harry potter one:S.Were chilling getting cosy and her ex fiance from yrs ago arrives,hes an ok dude but feels like a cock block.Anyways usually id curb my talk but im like fuck it whatever,like at one point Ron weasely (in the film) is under the effects of a love potion,im like he looks like hes getting a bj haha shes like yeh it looks like u and im like well u would know what i look like getting a bj in front of him and things like that totally not caring and he didnt say anything.I end up falling asleep on bakups tits haha.

Saturday 17th December

I wake up feeling like shit
So i head back to mine,im spossed to be meet black cat a 12 but shes the last thing i need right now.She apparently stayed at a m8s the night before.Anyways i lie on bed till 4ish ignoring her texts and calls all day.I eventually answer to get her to stop fucking ringing,5 mins later and she woulda got on the bus to her dads.
I meet her in the pub,funnily enuff talking to one of my best buds in the world whos back from working away.
Hes like i knew ud be meeting her,points at black cat and shakes his head.We chill in the pub for a bit as black cat gets more and more annoying.Im like lets get sum pizza and go mine for abit its way 2 early!!
So we do,we all end up coming back at 6ish and low and behold the smoking hot goth chick that i subconciously left the convo with the week before and didnt get to open is in the pub wid all the peeps i was talking to for the other day,all playing pool.I say to my m8 who knows about my pua journey.Im like i get a boner looking at her!!. joke!!! "im gona fuck her before i die even if i have to drag her down a dark alley and rape her haha".
The good old boy sets me up with some awsome material etc (sat either side of goth chick) ie ,she applies black lipstick,he to me"damn i bet you like watching her do that" me "im getting a semi watching her" then i point to my neck "i think your gona have to kiss me before i go insane" she does!! (i end up walking round with a black lipstick mark on my neck all night).We play pool and have a bit of a laugh,but in the end after another hourish she leaves with her m8.I was still 2 nervy with her i think,forgot to get her number so fluffed it a bit.The next day on facebook said hi but she barely answered me and after 2-3 msgs stopped answering full stop,so not quite there yet.

Anyways some other friends show with a board game called "Munchkin" im not one for boardgames usually especially not in a pub but Black cats doing my head in and my m8 is like come on dude lets have a shot,im like ok.
So theres a table full of 8 of us playing this game.It very quickly becomes apparent that i and my friend seem to have the two strongest mindsets at the table as we fart about ganging up on people and back stabbing each other and making a lot of noise and having lots of laughs.I look round to see randoms hanging about our table to see whats going on as were obv having so much fun.
Suddenly i feel a tap on the shoulder,its not black cat as i sent her out for a fag she was pissing me off so much,i look round i see awsome legs,then awsome body,then pretty face then ulp blond hair noooo,shes grabs my arm and shes like u dont recognise me do you?? im like "yeh your my ex from 10yrs agos best m8,got to say you got a lot sexier now tho" (she used to be propper nerdy looking ) "im not sure about your blond mop tho what happened to the loverly black hair??" We talk a bit and shes like im heading to the beer garden,im like ill be out in a bit.
My m8s like whos that??? im like exs m8 hes like mmm u should go for it im like no shes blond!! hes like so if u only speak to smoking hot and single goths you`ll only open 3 times a year!! and you might miss out big time!! im like ok dude maybe i can talk her into re dying black at a later date haha.
So i get another dude to play my turn till im back and go speak to exs m8. Shes outside with her older m8 from work.So i sail in and sit next to her arm round her and after basic intro chat i say "im on a date tonight" (sort of was with black cat) "but its not going well,i wish i could just drop her and have a date with you instead!!" she is like "well maybe you should!!" "I was like the thing is she cant get home so she has to stay at mine tonight".
i end up making her pinky promise me a propper date and she makes me pinky promise her a dance which seems fair,plus i remeber the number this time.The upshot of the rest of the night is im juggling exs m8,black cat and the board game haha it was real fun actually,diverting black cat so i can get over to exs m8 for a snog haha.I think the funniest bit was when one of the guys playing the board game had obviously seen me snog the face of Black cat and as he came out the toilet clocked me with exs m8 doing the same to her,to see his face as he slowly figured out what was going on was a fucking picture.Unforunately black cat puts her bag down and wanders off chatting then wonders why it gets stolen!! then expects me to find it,my m8s like just tell her to fuck off!! shes a twat!! im like i cant im not a bastard hes like ur still way 2 soft!! so we cant find the bag and she bursts into tears making a massive scene then and there i decide shes gone for good in the morning ive had enuff!! So im pissed off cos shes wingeing about going at half bloody 12 when its busy for a change and im having loads of fun!!
I got to say goodbye to exs m8 and shes likea ru gona fuck her?? im like no way shes on the couch!!
I take her home and give black cat a pearl necklace to say goodbye haha

Sunday 18th December

I make sure the door doesnt hit black cat on the ass as she leaves
Later that day i ring exs m8 and we chat for a good bit,turns out shes a teacher which is good for the inteligent talk etc fit and clever haha
convo is good turns out shes been single for a week so i got in quick
and i arrange for us to have our date on saturday chrisitmas eve.


through the week update, Phantom texts me some utter filth for a few days saturday-sunday then nothing!!! i text her monday night saying "when did we arrange to meet as i cant remeber" even tho we didnt decide on a day.No answer.I takes all my will to keep from ringing her and tonight im like ill give "back up" a shout as theyre bessie m8s she will know whats going on.Thinking shes probs outa credit or sumat.So backups out in the pub with the nob squad :S i drop in in fairly good spirits if a bit tired after work shes had a couple but not pissed.Im like u spoke to Phantom lately.Shes like i speak to her everyday we work together.So i tell her about not having any answer shes like "well shes not into you like that i dont think,shes not looking for a full time relationship" i was like "i never said i wanted one?!" after a bit fo talk about her fucking someone else.This to me was a total kick in the balls!! she says " well she said i was better than you in bed when we were having that threesome!!" this fucking stunned me as i strived to make that a possitive experience for all involved,it made me think of the disspearing from the pub and leaving me,standing me up and of them laughing at me behind my back,it all sorta clicked in place.I thought of all the chats me and backup have had over the past few months and how she knows about my sexual hang ups and how she knew how burnt that comment would make me feel.Plus all the help and support id given her asking nothing in return nor expecting anything.I even before i did go on a date with Phantom, i asked her how she felt about me going on a date with her she said it was totally cool.I tried not to react or show anything at all to her.But after 20mins of stewing on it and saying nothing,i was like im tired and hungry im going home,shes like "u ok" im like "yeh",she like look at me in the eyes and say that,i ignore her and storm off.As i get in she rings me and thats it i fucking loose it on the phone cant really remeber what i said and it was a pretty stupid thing to do,but actually trying not to react made me react more

Questions

What do i do about these women?? i thought about dropping the lot!!
If Phantom aint got the balls to tell me she aint interested, so what shes gone as a shag interest,and back up also.The problem is in a small town you cant just drop people and never see em again theyre both part of the small alternative community in my town so i will see them sooner rather than later.Im thinking of being a bit aloof and not flirty or kino and not hanging at back ups flat all the time anymore and just being friendly when out but keeping my distance.I wish id been more careful what i told women as Alpha D warned me!! they`l use that shit against u!! i dont think mine and back ups friendship will be the same again again.

Thoughts

.Im down to no women again,so quickly:S well i do have my date with exs m8,but thats it!!

.I cant understand how what i thought was a date went well with Phantom went so bad for her.Maybe she just wants to fuck different guys and i got the wrong end of the stick maybe i shoulda went with my gut feeling and fucked her that night,maybe it might have panned out different??

.As shown on saturday still way 2 nice!!

.Not funny enough STILL!! need more laughs.Im gona put up a separate thread on the forum when i get a mo,as its deffo my main weakness from what i can tell.If im funnier im sure ill get further!!

.I plan to go out every night if theres anyone out and about every night from 22nd dec to monday 2nd jan apart from christmas day!! try to get more socal feedback.

.Ive always wanted to be the guy who people ring and invite to things and events etc i never have been.A load of friends went of to a bigger city sunday evening and i wasnt invited,it kinda irked me even tho i couldnt go as they were staying over,itd be nice for someone to ring me wantng to spend time with me rather than me always making the effort.I hope this will change as time goes on.