AJay has it bang on!

Get to know yourself - know what you like and don't like so that YOU are comfortable with it, not ashamed and are happy with yourself!
Then when you go out it shows, the way you talk etc. that way you control the conversation because you have an opinion that you believe in. You tell people that we should go/meet in the bar/pub that you want because you want to go there, you like it. Confidence isn't about controlling people its about being comfortable and proud of yourself.

The other day I was talking to my HB10 about Smallville, yes it's geeky but she listened intently, giggled and was even talking about superman because I like it and I wanted to talk about it.