Im 34, was with somone for 10 years -- i spectacularily crashed and burned and completely lost the plot.

You cant change the past you can only learn from it and move forward.

When i look back on Facebook at all the awesome people from school they have all turned into fucktards and i just keep on getting more and more awesome.

Midas think about what you want, who you want to become and plant those seeds and watch them grow.
Forget about the past