so i rarely go on dates and had the first one in probably over a year last night...

met up with this girl who had heard about me from her kickboxing gym, (im an mma fighter) so she added me on facebook and we started talking...i think its important to not however that i nearly completely fuked up everything whilst talking to her..she is gorgeous and i felt this stupid need to neg her....so we were flirting a way and i said "its a pity i only go for blondes.. :P" this was not good...

as it turns out her ex was very controlling and told her how she should be looking all the time and basically thought i was a full prick..

but turned it around anway and got her into me again and we met up on sat night. When i saw her in person she was even more stunning than in her pictures, amazing body too and straight away was so sociable and talkative. We went to a bar and talked for a while felt i made alot of good connections with her she talked about her family and looking after her baby sister and just alot of personal stuff i guess which was good. She also mentioned about how so many guys are always lusting at her in the gym and that she gets looked at alot, not trying to sound all stuck u or anything but just being honest about it. I did recognise how i seemed to be building alot of comfort but no real sexual tension...

we left and went to see a movie, she bought me popcorn i didnt really want it and said dont buy it unless u want some, i was asked salt or sweet and picked salted. I was a bit annoyed at myself the popcorn she got me i didnt even eat and she noticed this and also she only likes sweet popcorn so didnt want any..wasnt a great impression...fs. She loved the movie was really scared whole way through lol but a few things that i REALLY should have done..

1. there was a lot of people being loud screaming and laughing and being a bit annoying so i should of maybe said about going to get someone to chuck them out..

2. put my arm around her, she was scared ans kinda rested her head on my arm..instead of putting my arm round her i put my hand on her leg in a reassuring kinda way but really should of had my arm around her i think..


its unbelievable the ridiculous things i was coming up with as to why i didnt put my arm around her....listen to this shite... i thought well..if i put my arm around her its a bit cliched and it may be a bit childish? If i put my arm around her and its not comfy then im going to have to take my arm off her and may make her feel like im rejecting her for removing my arm...?

how fuking stupid does that sound..jesus i swear tho this shit was going through my head..


so still no real sexual escalation by the end of the movie...i told myself before i left for the date that its best to get a kiss before the very end of the date and now it was time to drive her home fs .. got her home had a bit of flirting going back and forth in the car..got to her house...i felt really nervous and didnt know the best way to get a kclose, so i said about getting something organised again cos tonight was fun..

her reply " oh sure i thought u only liked blondes :P"

didnt feel like she really wanted me to lean in for the kiss, she ended up leaning and giving me a peck on the cheek....

text me later to see if i got home ok tho so maybe i havent messed things up entirely.. problem was that she had actually talked alot about exs and that there was alot of guys after her.. she actualy said how she was out with a guy and he tried to kiss her in the cinema and she turned him down.. think that played in my head a bit..

so again it comes down to being able to sexually escalate...im not used to it and havent been on a date in so long, any thoughts?