Interesting post, a lot of that is contrary to what I've seen in day gaming videos though.
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Originally Posted by tony77
Firstly dude let me say, good for you in going out and taking action. I understand only too well about anxiety and being in your head. Let me ask you something, before you approach, what is going on inside your head? Remember the girl is like your mirror so if you feel uncertain, nervous and scared she will just reflect this back.
If you're going to go direct, make sure you show some empathy "hey this might sound a bit forward/random" "i'm a bit nervous...." The reason women are walking away or blanking you is because you're putting too much pressure on them too soon to make a decision. Hence they're not comfortable. Your frame seems to be a bit submissive "please like me" Where is your masculine, dominant energy?
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From what I understand, the best way to show dominant energy is to get right in front of them and stop them dead in their tracks. At least that's what all the day game videos say.
I am not needy at all.
A bad approach is better than no approach! The chick that blanked me was just rude. I even gave her another chance by reapproaching but she didn't want to know.
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Also when you approach, do you smile and give women space? because you do not want to invade their space. This is why women move away because they don't feel comfortable. You have to think you're just a stranger and they just aren't comfortable talking to you yet because you haven't put them at ease. This is the problem with direct, most guys think that going direct will magically make women's panties drop but if there is even a slight hint you're not confident I'm sorry to say they will feel creeped out. This does not mean to say you're a creep but something you have done, your non verbals have made her feel uneasy.
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I find smiling weird, but I leave at least a metre of space. Often, I'll command them in a masculine way.
If that's not confident I don't know what is! I try to remain as dominating as possible.
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Look, in a shop I really don't recommend going direct. Lets take a supermarket for example. What is in a supermarket apart from people shopping? all kinds of produce, like fruit and veg, meat, crisps, chocolate, drinks etc! Anyone in there is carrying a basket or wheeling a trolley full of stuff, so it makes no sense to go direct! This is not a social environment. I'm not saying its impossible but just be smart here! You have an abundance of material to use in that environment if you open your eyes and use your observation skills!
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From what I've seen on the videos and in the comment sections, the general wisdom is that going indirect is "hiding intent" and thus sets off a massive "creep alarm".
The reason I've approached her isn't to do with her shopping, I could care less about that, I've approached her because I am attracted to her on an instinctual level.
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Think up some funny lines too if purely for self amusement. Its said you can open with anything but try using some cheeky funny lines because it will really help the flow of the interaction especially in the beginning. Something I use in a museum/art gallery if a woman is looking at a painting is I'll say "hey you like my work? it took me ages to do that and that little kid/old man kept moving" 9 times out of 10 I guarantee she will laugh. Just make sure you don't come across as too serious. If however she is not looking at a painting but say an old building (n.b I work in a big old city, lots of Historic buildings) so I might say "do you like my house, I would let you in but I'm sure you're house trained"
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One step ahead of you bud!
One of my favourite's is "I love you" or to gesture to her and say "Wow!". Or to blatantly say "I'm approaching you because I find you quite pretty".
It's the approach that counts, not the out come!
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Something else you can try on the street is ask for directions then go direct. So for example you can say "excuse me do you know where starbucks is?" so she starts to tell you then you can say "actually I have to confess I just thought you looked attractive and didn't know what else to say" then carry on talking.
What you're doing right now is too overwhelming for women. "hey you look incredible" what else do you want them to say? some may say "thanks" then the predictable walk away because they are not comfortable! Now if you had built some social comfort first, added some humour, maybe get to know them a little bit as well as sharing stuff about you then these girls might have actually atleast stayed for a bit.
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If you don't go direct, what is your reason for approaching her!?
Again, all the material that I've read suggests that going indirect puts you on a hiding to nothing. You aren't learning to be up front with a chick at all by going indirect.
Asking for directions is the oldest trick in the book and chicks lose a lot of respect for guys that aren't masculine enough to go direct. It's the definition of creepy!
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Something else I see missing from your approaches is Qualifying! This is a massive piece in the pick up! You have to screen whether a woman meets your standards and if she is worth your time. For example "are you cool" "I hope you don't just got out and get wasted every night" It might be a good idea to write down a list of attributes you like in a woman and not just physical but personality qualities.
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That's a waste of time because a lot of the women I approach seem to be married/engaged/in a relationship.
It hardly ever gets that far due to the above mentioned reasons.
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Out of interest dude where are you based?
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South east.