If you're not too interested in settling down with one lady right now, there's nothing preventing you from experimenting with different types of relationships. You may think this may not suit you, though you're not going to find out unless you try. I believe there are no limitations to the variety of relationships we can have, other than in our own minds.

I had become engaged at the grand age of 21 yrs old to Sally. I had been going out with Lucille, a stripper before her who was planning to move in with me though she was working away for the summer & although she was writing to me weekly & visiting me every two weeks, I got bored waiting & dumped her to go out with Sally. Sally was a hot, horny, blonde Cockney & worked as a model. She quickly became pregnant & so I sold my beloved guitar to pay for a termination. We were together for 18 months though we had different values. I was a little wild & was happy to be that way at the time though she was more interested in trying to tame me, so she had to go too.

I had found that monogamy could sometimes feel claustrophobic, so I did not want to go straight into another similar relationship. I liked being in relationships, though & fun, variety & sex were priorities. The commitment thing wasn't pushing any buttons for me, so I wondered what else I could do.

At that time, where I worked I would listen to some of my work colleagues at tea-breaks in the canteen chatting about their ‘bits on the side’ that they were seeing. Several of these guys were married & had children. They were lying & cheating on their partners & risking everything just so they could have more sex with someone else. Some of these guys were not surprisingly paranoid & worried about what the consequences would be if their partners found out about what they were doing.

I listened to them & thought to myself that certainly wasn’t the answer I was looking for. It sounded far too complicated to me & it grated against my values so I thought they surely must be a better way. Then one day it came to me. I thought to myself, “What would happen if I went in the opposite direction to what these guys were doing? What would happen if I found a girl that I was attracted to & was completely open & honest from the word go? What would happen if I told her exactly where I was coming from; what I wanted & what I didn’t want in a relationship?

A short while later I met a girl who I was attracted to. I liked her in many ways & she was fun to be with. I told her that I found her attractive & would like to begin seeing her, though I also told her that it wouldn’t stop me being attracted to other girls. I made it clear from the start that I did not want to be in a monogamous relationship because I wanted to have sex with more than one girl. Even though I did actually think I might get a slap around the face or told to go to hell, I asked her to go away & think about it in her own time, no pressure either way. I wanted her to choose what she wanted.

She phoned me the following day & told me she would be happy to go out with me & said that she appreciated me for being so honest with her! Of course I said that she was free to be her own person too so she could see anybody else she wanted to see as it had to be on equal terms for it to work properly. If we truly don't think we can handle that, it's best to put this idea to one side & stick to one girl as we have to be comfortable & secure within ourselves to do this successfully & in a positive way.

A couple of months later I did meet another girl. I told her that I would like to see her, though I said I already had a girlfriend who I was very happy with & did not want to stop seeing her to see this new girl. I told her to go away & think about it as I wanted her to choose. I told my first girlfriend what had happened & as she was happy with me & I had been straight with her, it wasn't a major issue & accepted it.

To cut a long story short, within 18 months I saw five girls at the same time, by using the same approach. It didn’t cause any problems for anyone & it certainly was no more challenging than being in a monogamous relationship for me. No mind games, up front & honest from the start. It had to be to work well.

Looking back, like in any relationship, I guess there must have been an element of luck involved, though I do believe it had worked so well because I was being straight. P.s. I saw the five girls for around one yr then decided to pick the most stable one to be with. We lived together for four yrs. This was still an open relationship built on trust & it was cool until she had sex with another girl behind my back & the relationship finished within weeks. It just goes to show that you can't trust everyone all of the time.

I've been doing the exact same thing. Works like a charm. You've just been doing it longer than me so...

Kudos.