Mid 40 year old looking to meet younger women. Can anyone help?
 

So I'm mid 40, and for many personal reasons (mostly due to lack of experience when I was younger) I do wish that I could still meet, date, have casual relationships, proper relationships with girls in their 20s. It's just that I don't know where in real life or online life I can still find these girls, I hope someone can advise me how to do this?

I want to be honest with them upfront, I won't lie about my age or what I do etc. (though I am young looking for my age) I want everything to be genuine. But I wonder how someone in their mid 40s can still meet girls early, mid or late 20s that are ok with a man my age or above.

I'm on sites like POF, OKC, I was on Tinder and Bumble etc. but I found that 20 something girls who have their partner age preferences up to 44-47 are incredibly rare.

So where else online would I find a larger abundance of 20 something girls looking for men my age? Any specialist sites of 'younger women looking for older men' or more generic sites that contain more open minded girls like this than what I'm used to. Does anyone else know any places on the internet to find such people?

Likewise as well as for real relationships, even casual hook up sites.

Also with real life, I don't know where I can find such girls. I don't go to bars or clubs really anymore but what types of bars are there where girls are more willing for this, like fetish clubs or places that are more specialist where the females are more open to my age.

I wonder where literally in the world to find such people. What countries where girls are more open to older men, Europe etc. Or what places in the world where holiday resorts are for this. is Ibiza, Thailand, Mexico but what places do other people here know about?

What other types of events or set ups like speed dating are out there that attracts younger girls for men my age?

Anyone with any knowledge of ways or places for older men to meet younger girls online or in real life do please let me know. Thank you for any responses you can give.

Just start by approaching girls in their 20's that you find attractive. Go to your nearest big city.

Hey man,

Just thinking straight onto the keyboard...

It's great that you want to be honest. That's a good foundation.

It's ok if you don't wanna go to clubs and that. What interests you? What groups or events are there for enjoying that interest in a non-solitary setting where the might be girls? Or just try out new things where you know there are girls, you might love it, become proficient in it and meet a nice girl who shares your interest. Not going to bars is whatever. But you must put yourself in the same places as other people in some setting you prefer.

It's not a fetish when a girl in her 20s is attracted to a guy in his 40s. Anecdotally, I can say that I think all girls that've ever told me about their sex life (and that have had one worth speaking of) have had at least one serious relationship with a dude in his 40s or 50s and banged several when they were in their 20s... or younger. I'm fairly positive others will have similar anecdotes.

I don't know what shape you are in or all that physical stuff but one should try to keep healthy, in shape and brush up well.

The rest is personality and even more esoteric tat after that which is more a part of your personal journey.


Peace,

kowalski

In my opinion, you need to go to bars. Girls go to bars to get laid. As long as you play it cool, smooth and mature, girls are going to dig it. Make sure you are dressed very well, groomed etc. Girls find mature guys attractive. Especially girls in their 20s since their experience is usually with boys their own age who are immature. Use your age to your advantage. I´m 28 and I get with early 20´s all the time. Obviously my age difference is less than yours BUT the same principles apply. When they tease me and say "Omg you are so old" .. (I know this is a shit test and they are trying to see if I´m confident in myself) , I just turn around lean in slightly and say "Well then you can call me daddy" with a cheeky smirk with complete eye contact. I ONLY do this when the conversation has started off well. It works like a charm.

Thanks for your reply here. I will go to bars and clubs if I have to, though right now I prefer not to.

Thanks for the stories of these guys that have banged 20 somethings and lower. It's a revelation for me that is a good shock of a wake up call to the possibility of this.

I'll think of ways to meet girls in real life outside of bars as you say though. Not sure in what ways however.

I'm in ok shape, planning on getting into fitness model shape in a couple of weeks time when I am ready to train again. After that as you say it's a matter of upping my Game.

I wonder if there are online sites that are the best ones for meeting young girls though.

It may take time but I will start to go to bars. Hard to do when my friends don't go out anymore.

I also wonder what are the best places/resorts/travel and backpacker destinations where it's easier to pull girls, the whole Girls Go Wild in Ibiza thing or something less full on?

I do wonder if I should even lie about my age. It's hard to do. I can't do it if it's for something more serious and with girls with depth and intelligence who I really like.

But for something more casual, I could get away with being 10 years younger in appearance and behaviour. I'm more comfortable doing that.

I just don't know if it's 'right' doing that.

Playing up to my age, that is something I could do if a girl knows my age it's true. Working anything with confidence is just a Win Win isn't it?

I just like to let them know I'm still a youthful at heart fit dude at the same time though.

Thanks man.

Just would be nice to know if a girl finds me attractive before I approach them.

I live in London so I'm in the heart of this place. Approaching girls in the day is tricky, easier at night.

I just find it nearly impossible chatting girls up in the day time though, coffee shops, stores, on the street. Would love to know the art of doing that though!

Mostly chatting to girls on a beach and something coming from that - that is one of my biggest girl dreams.

Hi, I got helped with getting more confidence with myself thanks to those guys: surgicalcoaching.net. Super helpful, You need to start taking action and even if you're not used to you'll get better both inner and outer.

Yeh I know what you mean, it's nice to know if a girl is interested sometimes. But then sometimes you'll need to build attraction. I'm intrigued by doing day game. So it could be one thing to consider. I've tried to give it a although thus far failed miserably. As in, the approach anxiety got me and didn't even approach! Anyway I'm going to give it a go again. Maybe in the Midlands where I'm based or in London (an hour on the train). Btw sent you a pm.

I spent a couple evenings with a PUA I know as 'D'. My friend suggested I meet him, but what I wanted to say was he is 41 and amazed me on how he was able to use his age to his advantage with all ages. I know he is natural but it does show age isn't a problem. I 'think' he approaches with a very mature 'father' like attitude, but quickly becomes playful? I don't know as he was focused on me but I watched his style and he commanded younger woman pretty easy by the looks of it without being weird or cheesy. Anyway, good luck

The OP is a year old

shops man shops! saterday night supermarket? pushing a trolley full of shaving cream and groceries=married with kids,carrying a basket with wine and chocolate=approach if she seems she wants u to you gotta learn body language. but shops are my fav im also pushing 40 if i find myself in a cloths shop i will ofton perv in a friendly way at woman who are buying underwear just be obiouse and if there smiling say hi and make a comment but most important thing is your smiling and being friendly and funny like i was once passing by a lady who was quickly holding up 2 night dress in front of the mirror as i past i grunted in her ear "the brown one" as she blushed i wispered in her other ear"it matches you complectoin" and walked off she walked away trying her best not to laugh

Definitely not creepy to date younger women. The age gap is great. Women in their late 20's love mature guys. And it's not only because the sex is great, it is also because guys your age are intelligent and have life experience.

Also, don't forget that women and men age differently! Plus, most people feel younger or older than they really are :)


Good luck man!

There are plenty of single women over 40 by the way who are still quite good looking. It can be hard if you are a man over 40 trying to get women who are under 30. I have done daygame though on a wide range of women of different ages. From mid 20 right up to late 40s. Some of the younger women did not seem that bothered about my age. But I was not able to get any day 2s with them.

I don't know what it's going to be like dating in my 40s, but dating in my 30s is, single moms.

Apparently, that's my type. I don't actively seek them out or anything. It just so happens that all the ladies I get with, are single moms.

I accept this, and I quite enjoy it. I'm not really the type for settling down and all that bollocks. I look at "families" and it confirms to me that I'm far happier with my life the way it is. The freedom is amazing. The last time I dated a girl with no kids was just over 3 years ago. Although, I believe she now has a kid.

I imagine the dynamic might change a bit when I'm in my 40s. I'm very much looking forward to younger-lady-older-man relationships.

When I used to use internet dating site many years ago most of the women I ended up meeting were single mothers. I suppose that was because single mothers found it harder to get new men than women without children did. So many opted for low value guys like me.

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But thats the thing i cant seem to stop it, but i have been told it shouldnt really be causing me pain so i was just wondering if anyone else did it or knew..idk

You are narrowing down your choice by looking online only. Online, even for 20/30 year old guys, is difficult so for you, it is going to be more difficult. It is possible for you to find younger girls, however are you in a position where they will be attracted to you. Do you have status? Do you have money? Are you in shape? Do you dress well? Have you experienced some cool things in life? All these things are going to benefit you when talking and interacting with a younger girl. Also, you dont have to go out at night to meet these girls. These girls also need to go to the supermarket, libary, shopping etc. You can see these girls everywhere. Talking to them will give you a good indicator if they are interested or not.

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older women are more pracical, and seam to be more easy going, less primpy and ALOT more experienced.

On the other hand the nicething about college cheerleeders are the older you get they still stay the sam e age. <-what movie was that from?

Also, the definition of older has changed a lot over the years.

Older for men now means someone over the age of 55, as I know guys in their early 50's who look in their mid-30's, as they take care of themselves and have access to better health/skin care. Remember, the gym culture only really blew up heavily in the last 20 years or so, and esp after Youtube/ Insta etc.

So this now means a woman in her mid-20's will be happy to even date a guy over 50 if he has all his shit together. But for guys, we still value fertility in a woman, so will typically date down in age.

Women and Men are different remember. Men value youth, Women value security.

I can understand the desire to meet people, but remember, relationships should be built on more than just age preferences. If you're set on pursuing this, honesty is key. Try exploring more niche dating sites catering to age gap relationships or attend events that attract a diverse age range. But also consider that seeking someone significantly younger may limit your compatibility. Are you sure this is what you want? Maybe explore connections based on shared interests or values instead of age range. What are you truly looking for in a relationship? That's the bigger question to answer.