Hi guys,

I have an issue which I have put off for far too long.

I'm lazy. I'm a slacker. I only take interest in things that keep me happy for the meantime. I haven't bothered to get out of this rut, because I am indeed that lazy.

It's time to change that. It's time to upgrade myself and find direction and focus.

I want to learn something, study, work towards something, but I have yet, even at age 26, to discover what it is I want to do in life.

I know what I want out of life, I just don't know how to go about getting there and improving myself, for myself. The knock on effect would, of course, be beneficial for all those in my life, but I have been such a lost child for so long, I have yet to grow the f*** up!

I had a reality check yesterday, and reality is like dropping to the floor from a 20 storey building. It hurts.

How can I find focus when I am a jack of all trades regarding interests?
I have trouble completing anything because everything appeals to me to some extent. Even the things I have a passion for, such as cars and the industry surrounding them, for example, I cannot find a way to focus on it and make my interests financially feasible; that is, to have the things that interest me actually work for me, and make money doing it.

I want to change now, even more so because I need to do this to prove to myself that I can. I have been comfort zoned for so long I have diluted my passions. I enjoy life, yes, for the here and now, but it's the future I can't seem to focus on. I need to get my balls out and do something I really want to do, but first I need to journey, somehow, into finding out what that is...

Any help would be more appreciated than any help anyone could have received, ever... Trust me. I ask you guys because you don't know me, you have no preconceived notion of who I am based on my epic failure to grow up so far. I need to just know how to start the journey on finding myself.

If anyone in London, on this forum, is a success to themselves and is realising their potential, please share your wisdom and if it means meeting up for a pint to do so, I'll gladly grab you some beers!

Many thanks in advance.

Kind regards,

-Trent H

EDIT: Also, I am not sure if this should be in the Off Topic forum; please move if appropriate.

Dude, life is far from simple but I think you have cracked one of the hard parts.


Once you know what you want in life then the rest is a piece of pie. Being a jack of all traders is not necessary a bad thing. My interests are varied and have dabbed at many things over time, being a jack of all trades master of none. But that has helped me as an Accountant to be able to form rapport with many different people and networking is a piece of piss for me, and a very useful tool.

If you know what you’re interests are then just make the decision to follow one that you can make something out of. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes – you have to make mistakes to grow up and learn from. You have to make decisions first tho.

Also, don’t rush things, your goals will take time and its not how fast you achieve them that matters – it’s all about the journey.

Good luck!

Good honest report TrentHawkins and some good words of wisdom courteousy of the Dolphin!

I listened to a podcast last night with Matt Hussey as the guest on the show, for me it was profound listening. Matt is a confidence coach who works for PUAtraining, i'm not too taken by alot of the stuff PUAtraining produce but Matt is a real exception. He deals with not only confidence issues but motivational issues and will help you to lay the foundations of a meaningful and successful life, not just with women but in all other areas of life.

I would recommend you give it a listen go to http://community.pickuppodcast.com/i...yInterview.mp3

I'm in a similar position to you at the moment as well, i've began to lose direction and focus particularly towards my career. I'm disillusioned with the profession i'm in, there's alot of bullshit and restrictions involved and it's certainly not all it's cracked up to be. Therefore i'm begining to wonder if i'm motivated enough and cut-out to do the job. Ideally you should aim for a career you enjoy, if I decide I don't want to be a part of the profession I studied for, for over 6 years I know this is going to cause conflict with some people, particularly my parents.

However we must live and die by our own swords. In life you only have sole control of one thing...that is you. Don't let the thoughts or opinions of anyone to try as they might to take control of your life. Only you can steer it in the directions you want to take it.

Dolphin and Hustler,

Many thanks for your replies.

Indeed I can see you get where I am coming from.

Dolphin: It is a hard task to know what you want, but essentially I know what I want out of life, so this is good, but indeed I have no clue on how to get there.

But guys, I have to look at everything with a fresh approach now; I have to make opportunities happen, and take them!

When I was younger I used to crumble talking to a girl I found attractive, and if I can pull within 20 seconds of seeing a gorgeous girl in a PVC Catwoman outfit with a whip, as I did on Friday (my gf and I are no longer, by the way), I must be able to apply similar "DO IT" tactics to my professional life, and sort myself out financially...

Time to stop this laziness; I will definitely check out that podcast Hustler when I can download it at home; much appreciated.

I hope that every effort you have put in guys has paid off.
I hope Hustler, that you find the right direction for yourself also. You have a great basis of experience by now I'm sure to help you!

I want that confidence in myself to become professionally AWESOME.

And indeed, it is by my own sword I must do this.

To be honest TrentHawkings as i think Dolphin was getting at, your allready half way there, I am also in the same kinda situation (There are thousands of us in the uk, you aint alone mate lol), but you have something i dont, you seem to know what you want but you dont know how to achieve it... Thats more than halfway there...

I used to do car mechanics when i was about 18 because i also loved cars, its a steady wage (minimul but still a wage) and i got my hands on some really tasty cars, why dont you do something like that, you aint too old, plus if its something you enjoy thats more valuable than the wage...

Really hope you get ya shit sorted man, make sure you keep me informed, it would sper my up to here that you got it all on lock!

P.S were abouts are ya in London, I recently moved out of Kingston Upon Thames (surrey) but im allways going back to see my daughter...

-Clipper

My mind isn't very hands on with stuff like mechanics, it seems.
I am more interested in the passion and industry surrounding the cars, and driving them!

I have an E30 myself

I'm NW London, near Wembley.
Used to be in Kingston 8 years ago for uni!

I'll see what happens; feeling very low at the moment, need to do something to sort that out!

I need to find a hustle at this stage. A calling that brings me out and gives me something extra to talk about; only so much I can talk about my current line of work - it's not that interesting!

Outside of that requirement, I just want something that develops me and gives me a focus... of course, something interesting...!

I would love to hear what made people sit up and go "AHA! That's what I wanna do my whole working life!"

Guys, quick update. I'm getting married next year, but working in sales at the moment so trying to transfer skills learnt here to that game. Been a so-so two years working in sales with some great highlights and some slightly more dismal times.

Picked up a flat with the missus, her family love me, I'm an all-round happy chappy except I still need to find that one thing Dolphin/David spoke of. I need to change my main contact email as I can no-longer access it, but will keep in touch from time to time.

I'm also writing a little bit now but not as much as I'd like. A few articles and blog posts here and there and in the background working on a longer story... Fingers crossed!

Hope you've all been awesome!