So, whilst im a mudda furkin king ! i still get hounded by fucking flakes, aways annoyed me most of anythin LET DOWNS.

it seems ive broached a solution to the problem... and its workin for me

Text messages.

so after making dates, i would just be cool and not bother textin or gettin in touch up untill the day or the day before or somethin.

i recently started just keepin in touch via text, just funny banter up untill the date... never mentioning the date, just teasin & fun text...

then on the day of the date carry on, then after a few texts say, so ill assume we are still playin out tonight.

its like out of site out of mind.... texts i find have been workin on this front.

I have a low flake rate probably cos of my texting like this.

plus I don't make it a traditional date.

i have a low flake rate too because i have no one to flake me

That's changing soon lad. You'll have flakes comin outa your ears.

And plenty more besides

Phil, what do you think is causing girls to flake in your opinion and why do you think not mentioning the date until the last minute and just keeping familiarity up that time works?

If i arrange a date with a girl and she txts me on the day saying 'are we still on for tonight'
ive usually arangesd to meet somone else already either that or i flake on her on purpose for not keeping in touch --

surely the real reason somone will flake on you is becauser you are not high enouch in value for her and she has other options who are just as good or usually better

Agreed. Balls to texting constantly until the date. Say what you need to say when you meet her! I find most people I know go f*cking mental texting every 5 mins looking for validation and then saturate the whole thing making them look needy and boring the girl to death. I've had a few flakey pastries myself as a result

Seriously?! Why does she need to keep in touch with you for you to keep to your word on an arranged date? What is there left to say?

I agree with Nova on this point. Your word is your bond?

Reflex, did u write your post from POV of a girl last-minute flaking on a guy?

As I've read it again and it looks like YOU have adopted a pseudo-female role on this -- if a girl doesn't text me constantly then it can be a good thing in my view. We all have our own lives to live, I can't be assed having my phone beep regularly, text received, me get up off sofa / take phone out pocket / walk to next door room where phone is (etc) only to find its another text I'm not interested in. e.g. one of the current birds I'm fucking texted me THREE times in a row without reply (she texted about trivialities/chat). Needy.

I think Phil's hit the nail straight on the head
Not going overboard by texting every 5 mins but not leaving it until the 11th hour to text because you'll come across as "the player"

I'm quite fortunate that I hate phones, if it wouldn't effect my social life and game in such a detrimental way i'd sack it off. When I get a girl's number I tell them straight - I hate phones! So if I take a while to text its because its outta battery/left at home/left at work/temporarily misplaced/outta signal(I work in the countryside) which is pretty much true.
But when I do have my phone and the time i'll send a few texts back and forth but then she might not hear from me for a few hours/ a day or so. It means I'm congruent without being needy.

See im the opposite to you guys i love a bit of txt banter and phone banter.

With girls i am just after fucking -- having a major horny txt build up to the first date has got me in situations where i have virtually been raped on walking through her door.
Girls that i am fucking but not arsed about --then i agree with you guys and i dont usually txt them much.

But girls i am interested in as potential long or short term relationships ive found if they bite when you txt them and you both end up txting a lot --things usually develop pretty fast.


IM happy to try all methods though its just a big experiment to me