# closed, now on to text game
 

Hi Guys,

so i was out sarging this weekend and long story short i number closed a girl (my first since this PUA thing... thank you, thank you, im proud of myself too lol).

We're now texting eachother and its going pretty slow. how do i spark her interest and get her to open up a little with her replies...

also any help and advice to get this picking up some pace would be much appreciated. Thanks.

Y45

Firstly. Don't text her all day. I made that mistake and lost a HB8 from doing so. Was pissed...But you live and learn. Even if she texts you back instantly with a question or this or that. Leave it for a while...Your busy. Another thing I found is that I would be waiting for her to reply and then over thinking shit. Again, bad...So yeah. Don't be texting her all day.

You want to be setting up a date of some sort but you don't want to come across as free all the time either (Even if you are). You want to be meeting on your terms. A way that I find easiest to ask a girl on a date without sounding needy is having a place I want to go drink at or visit that I haven't been before (Or may have, but like it...She doesnt have to know that though). I would simply send a text like this "Have you checked out (name of place) before? Im off on (day your free) and plan on seeing what its about. You free?". If she says yes then game on. If she says no but shes free another day, don't go with the day shes free. Say your busy and YOU pick another day. Remember it has to be on your terms.

dude thats awesome! thanks.

how soon after do i start to arrange something with her? i met her on Saturaday and called her Sunday evening (she didnt answer but texted) so i texted her back and i always seem to be the last person to text. givng her the power im assuming?

It really depends on when your free. You have already made the first contact so thats not a problem anymore. Don't contact her today if you haven't already. If she contacts you, usually asking how you are (boring), thenreply with something like "Hey, Im good thanks. Really busy though! Hope your well. Ill text you tomorrow or something when less busy" By saying something like that it's giving you the power AND your not going to be thinking if shes going to reply or text you cause you've told her you would when you can.

Your next message should be to the point though. You could text with something random first and after the reply ask her out or with a "Hey, hope your well" THEN go into the asking out part all in your first message.

I've already contacted her and it died with me asking her a question :s . There's always the worry that she'll never contact you if you dont make the effort. So i guess i'll wait and see if she either replies to my questio or initiated a text conversation.

i'll let you know how i get on...Thanks again.

There's no such thing as 'text game'.

If you make a strong impression, in-person, when you first encounter her.

A simple text: "Hey, Let's go for a drink next wednesday or thursday x' is ALL it takes. She'll make time for you.

Text/Phone game doesn't turn shit into gold either.

I would be talking about meeting up almost straight away after a few texts back and forth. I remember at first I felt nervous about asking girls out but its no big deal.

I dont like to think of it as 'text game' but generally I just try and be flirtatious and tease a lot in texts. Then i'll get straight to the point and sort out the date, its likely that she is waiting for you to ask.

I think you can game a girl no matter what way you may be communicating with her. I've purely got a girl into bed through mainly texting, A couple of phone conversations and a brief (Like 5 min) coffee meet (I was 'busy'). The second time I met her she ended up in my bed. Good times. Thats just one example...

whistleblower is spot on though. Ive learnt that I only text teasing a flirtatious things. As well as random. Never the boring same old crap. And I like to meet them asap.

Guys here's an update:

So I went against ur advice and said hi to her on facebook... she took the piss replying so left my computer on and just carried on with what I was doing. When I came back she had replied asking me how i was but she wasn't online by the time I saw it...

So I text her something random like " what are u thinking right now, don't think about ur answer just reply with what ur thinking about" (she takes her time replying) and replies. She then asks me what I'm thinking. I tell her "I'm thinking the song I just finished producing is going tobe a hit, butt I need a singer, can you sing" she says shew rubbish . I then show my disappointment and move straight into telling her I'm going out towards the end of the week for shisha which she enjoys. She says she can't make it but she's free on Saturday. I obviously said I'm busy Saturday (which I'm not) but offered to re arrange at which point the txt conversation died a death :(

Advice/ thoughts? Maybe help? Lol thanks

Did you provide a specific day in order to go out or did you just say end of the week? How did you say you were busy? What did you say in regards to rearranging it? And by 'died a death' do you mean she didn't reply to you?

Suggestions/thoughts:

I never say hi first to girls on facebook unless Im talking to them for the first time. All other interactions made by us over facebook are started by her, period. I hate talking over IM to be honest so try and avoid it.

In future tell the girl you are busy 'this day' 'that day' 'this day' etc and leave a max of 2-3 days left where you are actually 'free'. Preferably in the evening.

I personally wouldn't have text her something as random as you did. It comes across as if your TRYING to create conversation rather than just letting it flow or it being spontanious, thats why I suggested texting something that would relate to her in particular as it adds a reason to why your texting her and not because you just want to 'create conversation'.

You should have took the Saturday!

I am going to disagree with En1gma's earlier point about it all being on your terms. If she offers you a day and you would like to see her that day then I say go with it. It means she is willing to meet up with you, isn't that the point?

You've got to know when to hold em, know when to fold...

im really feeling the loe here! thanks guys! this forum is awesome!

ok let me begin by updating some more. so im at work and just as i get in and im sitting at my desk, i get a text from her... she replies to the text i sent her last night! I dont reply until 4 ish and when i do, i ask her a teasing question to which she replies...(its small tlak so im not going into detail). My next text goes stright into travel arrangements, as shes never driven to my area... so i make it easy for her and tell her to get the train to me and then i'll drop her home ;) (no complaints) she agrees and i then rearrange for Saturday. So i took the Saturday she offered. i did feel abit none alfa about it to be honest but hey unless she cancels on me, Im seeing her! Ok lets move on to your comments and questions.

En1gma:
i didnt provide a specific day. i just said "lets arrange something for another time cz im busy Saturday, have you driven to my area before?" ... at which point i didnt get a reply, and yeah by "died a deadth" i meant she didnt reply.

i'll take your pointers on board though. i agree its much more clear, direct and Alfa to say 'this day' 'that day' 'this day'. so noted for future gaming.

the thing is, because there is so less interaction i know very little about her and so i guess i was "trying" to creat conversation. all i know about her is she likes shisha and i dont want to over use that subject cz its what i wanted to do when we're out together... lets see how this turns out.

Wistleblower:

lol, i did, eventually! but the way i did it may have not been the prefered way because it now looks like i rearranged my plans around her.

Midas touch:

Please elaborate...

Y45

Good work, and dont over analyse the alpha male stuff. I agree its good to appear in control of the interactions and all that but if you get an offer you should take it. She may even be impressed that you re-arranged your plans to see her, its a statement of interest.

Good luck with the date, let us know how it goes!

Obviously be strong and don't let them control you but sometimes just say "fuck it" and fold. Just give in and go with your heart now and again. I don't like to chase after women, but I've been in that situation, thinking should I call her, or should I just wait for her to call me..? and once in a while I've just folded and called her. And sometimes, it's worked out for the best and I've actually been glad that I did.

I folded and called a girl the other night, when I was waiting for her to call me. It was 02.30 in the morning, so she didn't answer, but she texted me first thing the next morning. Then she messaged me on facebook, actually taking me by surprise and telling me how she feels about me. She said she wants to see me soon for dinner. I said, "Hmmmm, I don't know. It depends if you are going to waste my time or not. If you are going to play games, I will accept nothing less than complete and utter surrender ;)" She responded, "Okay, you win darling." (I said this because she LMRed me last time).

Whilst I can see the logic in seeing her on your terms, I'd say don't be difficult on principle. If you actually did have some plans on Saturday, fair enough... but if you didn't and she wants to see you and that's the best time for both of you, fuck it. Pride is not always your best friend.

Thanks guys! i will keep you posted. i need some advice on something this girl has done for the second time now.

So when i was texting her yesterday i told her to let me know when she's free so i could speak to her on the phone (we havent done that yet!) i made some excuse about hearing her telephone voicem to which she said she sounds like a 5 year old. So later yesterday its approaching the evening and im thinking " she should have called" ... so i call her instead. No answer. about an hour later she text saying she was out and didnt hear it. this is getting tiring i tried calling her twice and the first time she made some excuse up about having a power cut in her area and her battery is low so she doesnt want it to die.... maybe that was true but i doubt it! lol.

So now i want to text her about it but i dont want to be like "you bitch! i tried calling you twice and both times your fob me off...Bitch! lol" cz thats not my style. i kinda want to be playful so i was hoping you guys can shed some light on what to text her about not answering my calls. she could be really shy about talking to me...HELP! :D


Y45

UPDATE... (please note im doing this for educational puposes)

so i reply back to her text last night apologising for not hearing her phone ring when i called with the following.

[ME]
"its ok, i forgive you for not picking up. But i;ve nevr had my called missed by a girl so often... what do i have to do to get you to answer"...

[HER]
"Dont call ha, hows work? i dont know if i can come on Saturday now so may have to be after christmas! x"

are you serious?! she cancelled on me! what the hell? im trying to figure out why this happend. i suspect that i didnt generate enough comfort what are your thoughts...

That comes across as a bit needy, I'm afraid to say. There are two ways you could have played it. You could have acted completely unaffected; as if you hadn't even noticed or remembered that she hadn't picked up, or you could have called her on her shit, but with words that make you sound less hurt, for example: pick up the phone next time, or I won't call again.

I would have probably gone for option one because it's a bit early to be calling her shit.

It definitely sucks when girls cancel on you, it happens so dont beat yourself up too much. It may not be down to anything you did wrong.

Best thing you can do from here, move on and meet some new girls. Get in touch with her after Xmas if you still want to see her by then. Hopefully by that point you will have other options and you wont give her a second thought.

Take the positives, your first # close. Learn from it.

Thanks guys im trying to not to beat myself up over it. Im definately better off then where i was when i first got into this. so yeah much to take from it and much more to learn! This has been a great journy and im glad you guys have coached me through it!

what should i reply back to her? i want to sound uneffected by her cancelling. i was thinking...

[HER]
"Dont call ha, hows work? i dont know if i can come on Saturday now so may have to be after christmas! x"

[ME]
"Cool no worries just let me know, have a nice christmas.."

what du think?

That's true; there are often many things out of our control and then we start to over-analyse, wondering what we could have done better.

"Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can, and
the wisdom to know the difference."

I like that!

Fox - Im just going on what has worked for me bud. I'm not saying its the law...Just 90% of the time when a girl has suggested a day and time to me it's usually been changed by her...So I just wipe the problem from the equation. Plus, it make's me feel more in control of the date. Also it comes across to her that I'm a busy person who doesn't sit on my ass all day. A guy that's sociable and active...A subtle DHV.

Y45 - What you've said is fine. You can't do anymore. If you do try then you will come across as needy which am sure your aware of. I personally would say something along the lines of "No worries, another time...I've got a busy couple of weeks coming up so I'll hit you up at some point and then I can make fun of your 5 year old voice in person. :P Merry Xmas"

You done good though mate. If she ends up as a loose end then it's all a learning curve. The more you practice the easier it becomes. The easier it becomes the more of a challange you want!

Interesting Fox, I get you. Show that you DO care and are disappointed, but not to the point of neediness or irritation. Something like, "That's a shame, I was looking forward to it, but not to worry, I'm sure we will meet again soon."

I like this!

I've always said what Y45 has txt in the past, (pretty much to the letter, conincidentally!).

I'll have to give your suggestion a try sometime :)

Thanks guys! You've all been really helpful!

would be nice too meet you guys and go for a sarge if your in London. PM me your contact details if your interested...

Y45