12-06-2010, 10:43 AM
Try to not take what someone else says about you so personally. If someone throws an insult at you and it's affecting your state it's because you're being too self conscious, and you care too much what other people think about you.
If you wanna be successful in most things one of the first obstacles you have to cross is being indifferent. You WILL get a lot of shit from other people if you are hitting on random women, mainly from other women but occasionally from guys. Try to imagine that they're actually you're friends but are just having a little dig at you for a laugh. In fact I would say that the one thing that really helped me from being a self conscious chode to being indifferent was my ability to give people unconditional positive regard, or that is, I fell in love with other people because I realised that they are the same as me, they have the same problems and issues and needs as me, and they are just trying to deal with the absolute absurdity that is life, just like me.
I never get shit of guys any more cos of the unthreatening vibe that I give off. I walk up to a group of people and am genuinely interested in them, because the more people you meet, the more that you learn about people which is really what this stuff is all about any way. Once it all becomes familiar territory, it is a much friendlier place, which allows you to have the confidence that you want to have.
It's only technique in its conjunction with meaningfulness that you get a work of art
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