In your credit, Linguisticsmartarse (ironically in light of your username, you should have used a capialised "S" - like PostScript did) you successfully screened hard on a fit bird, making her qualify hereself to you to get the date.

You weren't intimidated talking to that hottie or making it an interesting fun date.

But as for seduction - you've fallen short.

Serendipity's post is on the money for what you need to do with the next bird.

I suggest you visualise in advance of the date how you want it to go (focussing on the seduction theme, esp. your SNL logistics), and how you will lead her and locations to take her (e.g. wind up at a pub near your place, short hop to your place, is one of many possible approaches), in order to achieve that goal.

I've found that in most of the longer interactions I've had the girls start qualifying themselves almost as an automatic reaction. I'm not convinced it means a lot. Like I say it's an automatic reaction they have to a man hitting on them (if they don't immediately reject him).

Getting them out on a date is a major acheivement in itself. The scene is then set for you to take it somewhere. That involves taking the risk of losing her in the first hour of the date as you lead things forward but what I've realised is you HAVE to take the risk or you won't be getting laid anyway.

I've been total shit at dates so far and expect to be for a while yet. If you're total shit the good news is you can only get better with practice.

And where did you get?

Disclaimer: I haven't got anywhere yet & I don't claim to know everything at all. The below is just my opinion.

However I think you need to drop the word "qualifying" - is that how you speak to your friends about woman "Oh yea dude - she was totally qualifying herself to me". Its a stupid PUA term; even looking for or thinking about qualifying is bad, its not normal. If you want to think about qualifying - think about it in terms of drivers trying to get pole position in the Grand Prix, or your nation trying to win football games to get into the Euro Championships, don't think about it in terms of women.

And sorry Serendipity, that last post comes across as over analytical and out there waffle - it is a bit "out there". How is it a major achievement to get a girl on a date? Loads of people go on dates every day, its a normal common social occurance.

Broadsword is right about all this use of 'PUA' lingo is not useful.

My feeling is you only value the advice of 'PUA's you've seen online or read about. Why ? They're selling a product, no one here is selling their advice, it's free and honest.

I'd like to see you dropping all this PUA chat however I'm not hopeful unless the above changes.

Qualifiers are a total non issue, tbh I'd forgotten what they even were until it came up here.


No it isn't, it's just normal. You've not really done anything by getting a girl to agree to meet up with you. It's only important and/or a big deal if you've convinced yourself it is

This is the kind of hair trigger, impatient 'I should be doing something' mentality that prevents people from getting laid. You don't have to do shit in the first hour. I've gotten laid plenty of times from dates and I normally do fuck all within the first hour except have beer and chat. The opportunity to do shit can prevent itself organically at any particular moment. It might take you a bit of experience to pick up on when that is, but if you can't relax, be normal and take things as they come you'll never get it. The only thing assigning weird time restrictions or feeling an obligation to move things forward will do is prevent you from being chill and natural, causing you to miss obvious opportunities and act like a stilted sex pest weirdo.