I ask this question because there has now been a few occasions over the last month or so where it's become apparent that I don't know what makes an IOI or how to read them. So now along with my approach anxiety, I recognise this as another huge weak point in my game. The 3 main occasions are these:

Occasion 1: There's a girl at work that I have been gaming but not with the intentions of closing. When I first read 'the game' I wanted to see if all the methods, theories etc actually worked and she was kind of like my guinea pig at the time. Since then I've continued using this stuff on her without thinking about it and it's now quite natural to me.

Recently she got a new boyfriend and I later found out from her friend that she liked me. I was totally suprised. There was nothing I can think of that would give me clues of this. IOI's or otherwise. Big opportunity missed.

Occasion 2: This was new years. We had a houseparty and invited loads of friends and family. I got absolutely legless and ended up f-closing one of my sisters friends. On one hand this felt great. This is now my second f-close since finding the community and since I was starting to doubt my skills, this was a massive boost for me.

But on the other hand I can't think of a time that she showed interest in me and therefore, like occasion 1, I failed to read any IOI's. At the end of the night it was just me and her awake in the dining room. She suggested we played poker and whoever lost the hand, drank. I kept losing so I turned the game to something else. I told her that if I pick out a king she drank, if not, I drank. Using controlled shuffles and fake shuffles I forced a king out every time. She drank. I went to the kitchen to get water before I went to sleep and she followed me. She hugged me but didn't let go. It wasn't until started kissing my neck that I actually realised she was in to me. I had no clue up until that point.

Occasion 3: Knowing I had a problem with reading IOI's I went out with my friends last weekend to a club. My aim was to look out for IOI's. Two girls my friends knew came up, I started to sarge the hb7. She touched her hair whilst talking to me. She laughed at my dumbest jokes. I used complience tests. When we were on the dancefloor, when I looked in her direction she was dancing like it was just for me, when I looked away she would dance normally and with less energy. I took these as IOI's. One of my friends could see what I was doing. before I could go for a close he told me she had a boyfriend and that they've been in a 5 year relationship. Correct me if I'm wrong but was she not giving me IOI's?



Do you guys have any suggestions/ opinions? is there any books/ articles that can help? Should I even be looking for IOI's? As well as AA, this is something I need to fix big time.

Firstly girls with boyfriends: The amount of times I've seen huge interest from these girls is untrue....I even K-Closed a girl in front of her boyfriend. These girls seem VERY eager. This is extremely common.

As far as IOIs are concerned. Your first priority is to ASSUME ATTRACTION. Don't get hung up on "IOIs" As a guy you are DESIGNED to be attractive to girls. Just by being there and talking to her, if she talks back or just interacts with you ASSUME she is interest.

However, VERY IMPORTANT POINT!!!!!!!! You can misinterprate IODs (indicators of disinterest). For example, if you are talking to a girl, she could say FUCKALL to you, but just be there with her head turned towards you, not speaking much initially. A lot of guys are well put off by this. They interperate this as the girl not being interested at all. If a girl does this to you, it is actually a MAJOR IOI!!

So the overall lesson here is..if she is close to you in proximity and talking to you, you can easily assume attraction, then just chill the fuck out (like you did with that poker girl)

Happy days!

All this surprise you are experiencing is a result of you doubting your attractiveness to girls, not a lack of your recognition in this. At the end of the day why should you be looking for the girl to give you approval?

It’s time for you to switch roles in your head and start considering that when you see a girl that you like that you are going to be the one giving her the IOIs… but not in an indicative sense, far from it, by taking the initiative and escalating - so I guess you’d call it EOI/ Escalation of Interest

Oh and nice work digging out those classic quotes Kowalski.

Kowalski's like the Dj shadow of PUAforum

Cold(cut) & Paste.

The quick answer to that is screw looking for IOIs. Go after what you want instead. Which reminds me of a lovely article, because I want to save you guys all the things I´ve been through.

http://www.attractioninstitute.org/h...-with-anything

It goes through how to start going after what you want instead of waiting/looking for IOIs, doing routines or anything else remotely simular.

It is much more rewarding in the end, trust me.

as soon as they look me in the eye its ioi