Hi guys, new to this so sorry if it's in the wrong section or anything.

Where do I start? I'm 20 from London and for as long as I can remember hopeless with women and have failed for a while to feel comfortable in social situations. I'm talking the lot: lack of eye contact, head down, leaving rooms/places out of awkwardness, saying the wrong thing and recently severe paranoia with regards to my appearance and what my worth actually is as a man. I do believe i'm okay looks-wise and of fair intelligence but I don't FEEL like I am, if you understand?
I've read a lot about inner game and believe this may be what I lack but have no means of improving it. I have also read the Neil Strauss book 'The Game' in search of inspiration and guidance and although I found it compelling and engaging, I failed to picture that being me. It made me feel more distant and less hopeful about meeting women and being confident in life if i'm honest.
This isn't to say that I haven't experienced women. I was in a relationship for 2 and a half years (all be it a terrible one) but we met at 6th form and it kind've stopped me developing any real form of 'game' or confidence in myself at all really.
So what I ask is this: Where do I even start? How do I get inspired?

- Jedi

You're in the best possible forum to handle this part of your life.

There's quite a few London guys on here, PM them to meet up, start from there.

Material wise, I'd say go for inner game type stuff, stuff about success, mindfulness, independence and self expression and self actualization.

Look through all the posts on here. I'll hit you up a few links to external stuff that I think are great for this kind of stuff.

But seriously the number one thing is to find wings and go out and speak to women, as often as possible and use ebooks/information to evaluate yourself as you're going out.

All about being around like minded people and pushing yourselves, having fun and learning about yourself.

As Tyler from RSD once said for those starting out. Year 1... GO OUT.

As for inspiration. Pussy?

If you feel worthless about yourself it's going to be hard to muster up that approach so maybe I'd suggest 2 things that I personally found work for me:

Firstly make yourself feel good - exercise and go buy some new interesting clothes that make you feeel good. Find a hair style that works for you and take care of your personal grooming. Basic things but they'll make you feel good (although you will never solve your problems with material things)

Secondly go out and socialize. The more the better. Talk to people who you don't know. Men, Women whoever. You'll increase your confidence with different situations and make new friends. Make conversation with people in queues, on the bus or colleagues. people really arent that bad

Hey man!

I know how you feel, i was in 2 relationships from 15 - 21 with about 3 months in the middle. i came out of them at 21 and didn't have a clue how to speak to girls that i didn't know. I felt like i was always a couple of steps behind the guys who developed game in those years.

I just tried to get out of my comfort zone as much as possible and meet new people & then went backpacking for a few months which helped loads and helped me develop skills in speaking to people i didn't know.

Good Luck , Keep us posted

GoodRebel

Had a bit of a confidence boost recently, just landed myself a new job with some actual career prospects, can only see this as something that will aide my confidence for the future. Still find myself lacking the actual ability to have prolonged or meaningful conversations with new people: after saying hello (usually initiated by the other person I might add) I start to feel as if it is the last thing I want to be doing and that I want it to end straight away and therefore I don't make eye contact, make short closed responses and come across as weird in these people's eyes. Think this is still down to a lack of confidence with who I am and what I feel a can bring to other people that's of interest. Annoying but hopefully some progress made, plan to go out with a friend of mine this coming Friday and attempt to just start some conversations with people, any tips for engaging people in bars at all? Or do you suggest other venues? Btw thanks for the help already, been busy with this work thing so haven't had a chance to log on and respond.