basically im 20 havent had sex, have good game, can get girls no.s etc np. have had the opportunity but turned down sex with a couple of girls because i didnt really find them that attractive. also bailed from a possibble f close situation with a a pretty hot girl i think because i wasnt sure whether i wanted to have sex with her or not as i didnt really feel anything for her. the fact that i have now waited so long and turned others down, means my virginity is more and more 'sacred' lol, it means that wen i do have sex it is with someone who i really like. theres one girl i wud like to have sex with but she is a friend, she has a bf and i dont think i can just wait around for ever. i think im just making excuses for myself, maybe im just realy nervous and anxious and am telling myself i can only have sex with my dream girl( who im never realsitically at this point going to get). the lack of sexual experience/ confidence means i am losing out on other hot girls cos they can sense my inexpeirence.


so anyway what was ur first time like with a girl?did u regret it? shud i just have sex with a girl or wait for someone i really really like..(who i may not ever find), its getting to the point were i feel im missing out on being young and having fun and it does depress me a little.

thoughts appreciated guys,

Not an easy one bro...

As someone who waited, my first time was important too, and it wasnt with who I wanted and it made me feel shit for ages.

It wasnt what I expected either and was like, is that it, was that what the fuss is all about - damn.

You just gotta look into your heart and see what is it you really want from all this and go with it.

And never forget - a good blow job is a very close substitute.

interesting...


it's definately a once in a lifetime thing. you only lose youre virginity once. so you should see it as special sure!

but dont put too much pressure on, my experience, and a lot of my friends is that, the first time, is kind of a 'trial-run' if you will? you may be unsure of yourself, you will certianly be nervous. Don't expect it to be amazing, take it as it comes, then learn form it. I can honestly say, that it wasnt until i'd shagged 3 or 4 birds, that i really started to enjoy sex and got good at it (or at least i tell myself that) hahaha

Relax, Focus, and Enjoy it when it comes!

Good Hunting!

Corrected.

Adam is right. I can appreciate the guys saying it's an important thing that should be carefully thought about, because that's what it clearly should be for you. On that front, I'd stick with Jaz's advice and wait until you find a girl that is right for you.

Personally, my first time was with a girlfriend, but a girl who I was only with for the sex. I knew she was a bit dirty and I wanted a piece of the action. As a result it meant next to nothing for me, but because I hadn't kidded myself in the first place about it having to be a momentous event I don't regret it at all.

What I'm saying (in a bit of a round about way) is that losing your virginity is whatever you make it. If you want it to be special, you're better off making it special with someone you really care about. And don't put too much pressure on yourself - there's no shame in waiting for the right person, and the majority of girls would be attracted to your unashamed honesty if you told them.

I never saw it as sacred. Like Adam I was pleased when it happened, but yeah, it's all personal opinion when it comes to this. I think you are making excuses to a degree. You say you weren't sure if the hot girl (you must have wanted to f*ck or else you wouldn't ahve found her hot) was 'the one' and questioned if you had feelings for her. This is a huge dilemma to bring into the equation. Are you planning on getting to know every girl first as friends? This is going to leave things as an uphill battle if you finally do realise you really like the girl, as she will see you as a friend and completely uninterested in her sexually. However you could take things to the bedroom and cut short at petting and foreplay until you are ready, then you can potentially build things up slowly from there until you really do think the deed is worth doing.

Will be sunning on the west coast of Africa this thursday Adam.

Want to get back into it, next thursday should be there.

Miss you too.

Xxx

Good point. Once you go through dry spells the old standards start to fall by the wayside! Things can get built up too much in your head with 'hot' girls and you end up talking yourself out of potential action. Get into the swing of things and you will realise that's it's no big deal.

My first time was when I was 16 with my then girlfriend who was 18 and hot

I wasn't planned and I had no condoms so I had to go out and get some. I went to a village pub none there then I went to a garage. It was a hot summers day and being a bit embarrassed about buying them over the counter I hung back and got an ice cream so I would be at the end of the queue.
I chose my ice cream (a feast I think) and got to the back of the fairly short queue.

In front of me were two old ladies who saw I had just an ice cream they insisted despite myself insisting it was ok. So I go first and ask the woman behind the counter for some durex too quite quietly, the woman then says "sorry what did you say?" loudly so I say "some durex" louder, "Oh condoms!" the woman says even louder.

I pay then turn round and see two incredibly horrified and shocked old women who thought I was a nice sweet boy buying an ice cream, when infact I was going to have sex all afternoon.

The sex was ok it took me ages to cum but It's been a lot better. I wouldn't recommend you be sacred about it, to me it seems a bit of a sentimental view.

I remember having to wait 3 months with my girlfriend at the time for full intercourse, she was 16 I was 18. It was her first time as well and she began to cry and cry more hysterically as the intensity grew. It felt sort of wrong, like I was raping her so I had to calm her down before I could continue.

It was quite an anti-climax really.

So my advice would be just wait until you are ready or just find a girl who gives good head, its less effort and in my view much more satisfying! and if she swallows there's no man-mess to clean up afterward!