I'd like to add that often people act happy on the surface so a jolly fat man could be pure front.

You might, many deaf people choose to remain deaf despite having the option of a cochlear implant. Just because you wouldn't make that decision doesn't make it a wrong decision.

If it's not broke, don't fix it. If it is, get off your arse and go jogging fatty. Whether something is broke or not depends entirely on the mindset of that person.

The "jolly fat man = a front" argument is irrelevant, there are people putting up fronts in all walks of life for various other insecurities, this does not however mean that there aren't also many people that simply aren't insecure about those features.

...must...resist...joke...must...arghhh....resist. ..joke...arghhh...must...arghhh....resist...arghhh h....BANG.

See now I've blown up holding it in, thanks a lot Jay.

PS

inside a jolly fat man, an unhappy thin man in a fat suit is trying to get out!! :hihi: :vroam:

I still don't see the benefit to the guys on this sit saying don't bother being fit.

personality can help make up for being unfit. why have uht when you can have fresh?

It's not about benefit at all. This is the issue with the way many people judge others. It doesn't matter what you think or what anyone thinks, it matters what they think. If they're happy being like that then there's no reason they should change it. This includes the health counter argument because when I say happy I mean on all fronts. If you are worried about your health you're not happy with your body.

I'm not talking about the benefit of not being fat versus being fat, it's irrelevant anyway. If you're happy with your body, as with the health argument, you're not bothered about any potential negatives, you're completely cool with it. In true contentment with yourself there is nothing that you need to change at all. Changing something in fact invites unhappiness. When you constantly look at how you can improve yourself you are constantly re-judging yourself and searching for flaws. When you stop looking for flaws or ways to be better and just say "fuck it, I don't care anymore" with true belief... You finally escape the cycle of unhappiness that validation (yes including self validation) creates.

The first step to this was brought in with RSD's blueprint in telling everyone to self validate and stop seeking it from everyone else, this indeed makes you a stronger person and helps in attracting women. It can be taken even further although taking it further does not necessarily have any benefits towards attraction. Stop validating altogether and transcend the entire concept of a value judgement based system, by validating yourself you are still participating in a societal concept of judgement and value. By leaving the system altogether you escape any form of unhappiness such a system can create.

OK I finally get it, and now that I do I would like to thank you for your patients you are truly a great teacher. I'm still gonna work out but that has made me look at my own self-judging.

jay i never read anythin u write, i would like to, but i cant be asssed..

any chance u can bullet point for me underneath future essays. im not jokin either

Jay presented quite an in-depth argument.

Excellent and worth reading to appreciate the nuances.

Jay's argument and conclusion goes to the heart of what TV show like that recent C4 one Beauty & The Beast: Ugly Face of Prejudice - Channel 4 in which deformed people who are hyper confident and self-accepting would mentor a person who was massively concerned about appearance to point of obsession and unhappiness.

There is also a University research-approved test on C4 web state about body confidence at Beauty & The Beast: Ugly Face of Prejudice - Features - Body Confidence Test - Channel 4 which u might wish to give a whirl.