Tony77, completely agree with you. In future I am not going to spend so much time & effort with someone at workplace who is already attached. Having said that, all I have done was had 3 coffee with her over course of 3 weeks, which one could argue isn't that bad. I have now left that job and on the last day, she said that she is sad that I am leaving as she will be losing someone she could chat with at work and will be sure to invite me for her wedding. Sort of made me laugh and validated most of what you guys were telling me. Phil did say in an earlier thread that women don't know diff between men who want to fuck them and those want to be friends, LOL.

Nova, isn't this one aspect of adding value? Being able to show that you have insights into her personality and blah blah. To be fair, it went down well so I am probably going to try it again and be the judge of whether it's effective or not.

Safe, I'm not disputing the power of insight if that floats your boat.

I can guarantee that the routine will not add "value" to you, whatever you interpret that to be. No well memorized or reharsed routine will make women think any more of you or be more attracted to you. A lot of them will see straight through the gimmicky bullshit, and will question your true motives.

What made you think it went down well? Did she smile? Did she seem intrigued? Did she look impressed? Yeah?! So what? Means nothing. Don’t mistake someone being friendly for more than what it is. They’re not IOI’s, you are not triggering some secret invisible attraction switches that’s going to cause her to fancy you. It's just someone being polite and friendly.

PUA gimmicks and routines are a dead end. It took me too long to realise that. Then a wise man who no longer bestows/inflicts his wisdom on us here anymore it seems (I miss kowalski) directed me to the e-book on the link below. You may find it very useful. It may have no affect on you at all.

The Seduction Community Scam | Attraction Institute

Just imagine for one minute that the things you genuinely want to talk about are of value. The things you are passionate about. You can harness this genuine energy to flirt with the girl. The value of which you speak can be equated to gold watches, i.e. trying to impress the girl and live up to her assumed standards. This is meaningless really, and if the girl is worth her while she will brush you aside.

I tried routine this and routine that for a long time, all I ended up with was a load of birds who thought I was some kind of magician, they'd ask for more and I became some kind of performing monkey.

I went traveling on my own recently to Borneo specifically to see Orangutans in the wild. When I came back I didnt have the slightest interest in picking up (still don't) but had a conversation with a girl in town and she was instantly wowed by my trip, and how confident I must have been to go alone - BAM instant value.

I'm not saying go look at wildlife in a far away country but on reflection of my own experiences both recently and years ago, to learn something specifically for impressing someone else indicates a lack of belief in how interesting I was. Learning something because I want to for my own good and then talking about it because it's part of my world is a different kettle of fish.

Well said. This is how value can genuinely be demonstrated. Not to show off and impress, but to self-amuse.

to be happy pursue and do things you are passionate about
- this happyness also makes you very attractive
- plus you potentially could meet a girl into the asme thing -- which is a great base for a soul mate, life LTR

BUT - it also helps if what you are passionate about is somthing that chicks like or do!