Faith, commitment and dedication - A journey of consistency
 

Hey guys, my name is Pete and I am a 28yo daygame newbie.

I'm based up North and I am going to start consistently daygaming!

A little bit of my background. When I was younger, I was somewhat social and was actually alright with talking to people. The thing is at 21, both of my parents died. Then I went to a very strong depressive stage that lasted from 21-26. Tbh, I had thoughts about offing myself but I thank God I never did it.

At 26, I moved from London to up north and started being a bit more social. I am currently studying at one of the universities. I got laid twice during my first year both were complete flukes. The girls lived in the flat underneath me and somehow, someway ending up hooking up with both girls on different days. They were just one and done, I was terrible at sex and basically didn't finish on both times. I was so drunk with both girls and they didn't call me back.

Covid started and I was stuck at home during my second year of study. This drove me almost crazy and I decided to do some daygame during the first lockdown.

I committed to approaching at least 1 girl a day for about 3 months. During those 3 months, I went on dates with 4 different girls I met doing daygame. I pulled all these girls back to my flat and my room but I didn't know how to escalate without alcohol and basically messed up at least 2 possible lays.

In my last month of daygame, I ended up meeting a Russian student while daygaming, we exchanged numbers and ended up going on 4 dates. On those 4 dates, we hooked up twice and fooled around on the other 2 dates.

I basically watched as many videos as I could on escalation.

Plus going out every day for 3 months, talking to people and being in the good weather really really boosted my mood up. I made a commitment to spend as little time as home as I could, I would just go out and do walking meditations. I would basically walk and keep my mind clear during the time. This helped me to be extremely relaxed when talking to people.

Two things that helped me so much was:

An eskimo kiss escalation that ToddV talked about in his product 'Daygame Mastery' (I think that's what it is called):
Play thumb wars.
After each round escalate a bit more.
Start with rubbing forehead.
Then second round, based on whether she's receptive ->
Rub noses and escalate into a quick kiss from there.

The concept of basically 2 steps forward and 1 step back when escalating. Whispering something in a girl's ear for a short period of time and then backing off to relaxing and laying back. Mixing up the different types of escalation, not just doing the same thing over and over again but of course being utterly respectful of the girl's boundaries and constantly gauging how she's responding to the escalation. If at any stage she shows any discomfort making sure to apologise, back off and going back to just joking around.

Well after the dates, I got lazy with daygame and thought 'I don't need to go out anymore!". I got needy and she stopped replying to my texts.

Writing this, feels like I am talking about a completely different person haha

Here I am again, restarting my daygame and hoping to get myself back out there.

I am basically restarting becoming social again and talking to people.
Right now my goal each day:
1. Talk to every single man or woman that I come across, talk to the first person I see whenever I come out of my house.
-Ask a question, make a comment on something interesting or offer a genuine compliment.
2. Talk to 5 women a day. 1 of these approaches should be a conversation over 2 mins.

For the first 3 months, I am not going to focus on collecting any numbers or any contact details.
I am just going to focus on talking to men/woman without any intention or trying to get anything. I have been doing daily meditation also.
I also want to commit to do approximately 6 hours of meditation a day. It really really helps me throughout my life.

Reiterate my goals:
1. Talk to every man or woman I see. First person I see as soon as I leave my house, I talk to.
2. Talk to at least 5 women a day. Even if it's just very short conversation.
3. One of these conversations have to be at least 2 mins in length.
4. No phone numbers or IG closes during these first 3 months. Just focus on talking to people with no intention or nervousness. Just chilling.
5. Meditate for 6 hours a day. Take the vibe I have when meditating. That feeling of contentment and not needing anything, take that feeling and use it when talking to others. Talking to other people from a place of contentment.

Thanks guys! Tomorrow is day one. This is a long term journey for me, an exercise really just to build my social skills and meet a great girlfriend.

Great stuff man!

It's cool how committed you are mate, i'm very curious how you're going to manage 6 hours of meditation per day!? Full on monk mode, are you not working atm?

Also would suggest to not stick hard to your rule of no closes although in general it's a good mindset to have. Don't miss out on the love of your life because of a hard and fast rule!

Thanks man, I appreciate the encouragement! :)

Thanks for the kind words man!

I haven't updated the FRs because I have been so busy with the release of software projects that I have been working on through summer. However this is just an excuse, I can always make time to go out and talk to people.

Right now I am studying a 3 year course. My course continues again in October. I saved money that I received during the year from Student Finance basically.

My free time usually consists of programming, studying software books and meditation/game.

You're absolutely right about not taking the rule of 'no closes' too seriously, thanks for that! I think got too focused on the whole not being attached to an outcome :)

Hi Luffy,
What you are doinv is great. Even though We are at different stage in oud life (I'm 44), your commitment inspires me. The only advise I would give you is to read personal development books. It does help me a lot. for the past four months, I read The concise laws of human nature (Robert Greene), The rational male Rollo Tomassi) and I am reading The game by Niel Strauss. All these books changed my life and I wish I would have read them when I was your age..
Your doing great buddy

Hi 99,

Thanks so much for the encouragement! I appreciate it :) All those books, I checked out briefly and I will give them a read in my free time :)

Alright guys, let's start with a report:

Over the last few weeks, I have:

1. Moved into a new student accommodation. I will stay in this accommodation all throughout my third and final year at university. This new accommodation is so close to the city centre and it's so easy to just go out and talk to girls. Plus if I ever have the feeling my breath isn't too fresh, I can just walk home and brush my teeth and go out again!

2. I have got a part time job. I only intend to do it, until my student loan comes in at the end of September. After which I will focus on studying.

3. I have started approaching again!

Ok so I have been going out for the last 2/3 days. The goal right now is just to get used to talking to people again and just being relaxed while doing it. Just getting used to talking to others.
Right now, it's going pretty chill. Got a few contact details, a few short conversation and a few long conversations. That's about it.

Let me tell you about this weird experience:
It's sunny outside and I'm walking down a hill. The sun is shining in my eyes so I don't really see to clearly people who are walking towards me. This will be important later.
I am just minding my own business and walking. All of a sudden, a woman appears right in front of me. She must have been walking towards me but with the sun in my eyes I didn't notice her whatsover. I almost walked right into her and had to swerve. She definitely noticed and looked kind of annoyed maybe, I'm not too sure.
Well we walk by one another and the conversation goes (I'm paraphrasing, this happened like 3 days ago):
Me: Man that was so awkward! (It was kind of funny especially the way I sidestepped)
Her: What was awkward?
Me: When someone's walking towards you and you don't notice so you have to shift to left/right
She bursts out laughing.
Her: I noticed the way you dodged me but I didn't want to say anything
We start talking, I find out way we go to the same uni and stuff like that.
She's walking up the hill and I'm walking down the hill.
I turn around and start walking up the hill with her.
Her: Weren't you walking down the hill
Me: Yeah but I'm gonna go Tesco and get a meal deal.
Her: Ok
-- I didn't do it smoothly whatsoever---
We continue talking and we get to Tesco and I am about to go in and get my meal deal.
You might not believe this, she actually asks me for my number.
I hand her my phone, she puts her number in my phone and then calls it.
We say our goodbyes and I go into Tesco.
Crazy stuff!

I have daygamed consistently for about 4 months in the past before this and in those 4 months of talking to on average 1-3 girls a day. I think only 3 or 4 times has a girl ever asked me first for my contact details. Looking back at those experiences, one thing that is common is that in all those times I was feeling good, just saying whatever was on my mind and not even thinking about getting the girls contact details. Man the key is to be like that all the time mannn.

We've been chatting and she's good looking but she takes ages to reply. I noticed when we were walking together that she is really confident and social. She was just talking to me as if she had known me her whole life. I am definitely sure I am just one of many, many guys that she is talking to but anyways. I went out again and I've been speaking to other girls and got a few numbers.

Right now, as I am in my final year of uni. This year I just want to focus on getting good at just talking calmly to anyone man or woman, no matter the circumstances. I dont want to focus too much on closing. The reason is, I have a remote software job lined up already and as soon as I graduate. I am moving to a place with a way cheaper Cost of Living and just gonna live nicely there and save my money to buy a house in the UK. I am building my daygame skills and being able to talk/approach people calmly so when I am in a new country, I won't have any issue being social.

Thanks all, I am going to update hopefully tomorrow!

Great stuff with progress Luffy.

As the Rational Male has been mentioned, you might want to check this thread out:
https://www.puaforums.co.uk/psycholo...o-tomalsi.html

Z

Thanks Dr Zed, I really appreciate the positive comments ������ It makes it so much easier to be consistent when others are supporting you :)

I started reading that book by Rollo Tomalsi, I had to take a break there's a lot to break down in it, wow. I will come back it to later ����

Not much to report gamewise, ain't done an approach in ages. Lifewise, I said before I got a new job. Right now just working tbh. Not a very exciting update :(

No probs,

Ultimately it's up to you what you read, though it's interesting to note that a number of "dating coaches" have reviewed the rational male and weigh up its pros and cons. Stein here mentioned Mark Manson's "models" as a more useful resource (I'm yet to read this).

Ideally the sooner you work on dating/game of some form, the better, even if it's just online dating. Still experience.

Are you meditating for 6 hours a day? I've heard of some folks meditating for 2 hours a day and that struck me as excessive, almost like they're trying to escape reality. There's no experience like the truth.

Z