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Default Saturday night - 04-07-2010, 10:37 AM

Ok so this is a field report and I need advice too.

I approached a couple of sets last night but that was about all. I still have bad approach anxiety and I felt really out of state as well.

I approached this one set which went like this.

Girl A: Do you have a lighter?
Me: Sure but it's not free. You have to answer a question.
Girl A and Girl B: Sure what question?
Me: So if a magician could turn you in to anything, what would you be? Don't say princess.

I saw this somewhere and instantly liked it. I use it a lot and then usually do a cold read from the answer.

Girl A: I'd be a transformer.
Girl B: I'd be a beef and horse radish sandwich on rye bread.

These answers threw me completely as they were easily the most bizarre answers I've ever had, and I ask this question a lot.

I laughed and said that they were crazy with a smile on my face and we talked a bit more. Then girl A left to go back in the club but girl b stuck around for a minute just talking before leaving.
I realise at this point that I should have transitioned in to a story with and opinion element or shown her a mind reading magic trick (I occassionally use magic in my game as a dhv because I like doing it).

I know where I went wrong with that set and can now correct the situation.

I want to ask how did you guys get over your approach anxiety. I feel like I could use someone to push me as I always do better when it's almost like a competition but I don't have a wingman.
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(#2)
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legend's Avatar
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Default 04-07-2010, 10:50 PM

Dont be too hard on yourself. You did well approaching the two set. Keep at it.

Do a search on the forum for this. A lot have been written about AA. Here's one example:
AA Is Normal.

Good Luck!


----------------------
I am LeGeNd...
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Default 05-07-2010, 10:03 AM

Everyone gets AA mate,
Like you i didn’t indulge in the company of other pua’s nor was I assisted by wings. So when ever out I would ask whom ever I was with to challenge me to open a set, if you’re like me and enjoy being challenged and thrive off competing, this will help motivate you to get over your AA.

The biggest tips I can give that helped me are:

Don’t go out solely to pick up, if you do and you have one of them off nights you’re bound to encounter, it will fuck your whole night up and lower your confidence.

Use the 3 second rule, ok It doesn’t have to be exactly 3 seconds but if you see a set and think about opening you have already fucked up, AA will start to kick in. So go out, recognize an opportunity to open and approach before your brain has time to process what it is you’re planning on doing. Before you know it you’ll be hooked into a set and enjoying yourself.

When I was training for a fight, I used to suffer from horrific anxiety, it got so bad that I thought about quitting and never training again, I didn’t want to fight and I could never get asleep when ever I thought about it. So I stopped thinking about the fight, just totally blanked it from my mind up until I was actually facing my opponent but then it was too late to let anxiety effect me, before I knew it, some guys fist was in my face.
Although this has no relativity to pick up, the principle is the same, if you think about it too much it can fuck you up mentally.


Aim high, achieve great things

Last edited by Wake; 05-07-2010 at 12:35 PM.
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Default 05-07-2010, 02:22 PM

Quote:
Originally Posted by rocknrolla View Post
I want to ask how did you guys get over your approach anxiety. I feel like I could use someone to push me as I always do better when it's almost like a competition but I don't have a wingman.
I know exactly what you mean with this part mate.

As far as getting over approach anxiety, there are no quick fix tips. Like anything, thoe more you do it, the easier it will become eventually, it will just take time.
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Default 05-07-2010, 06:20 PM

Thanks guys. It's good to know that everyone gets the fear.
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aofelix's Avatar
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Default 06-07-2010, 04:57 PM

Try watching Fresh Prince of Bellair lol.

See how smooth Will Smith is. He sees a hot girl and just goes up to her. He gets blown out a lot but does he care? No, he goes back for more! Born to be a PUA, that lad!
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